What are we striving for? Many people will say "to train children to be a good person". Indeed, we are proud of our excellent children. So, what is excellent? Do you have to be a pillar of rarity? Or do you want to become the big boss of a rich country? Not really. Children who can do the following 3 points are very good:
1. Have a healthy personality;
2. Have a skill, you can easily support yourself;
3. Have a positive personality, and life will always have hope.
It seems simple, and it is not easy to do well. Excellent children are not fed by the great truth, but are cultivated by the influence of many details in life.
The following 3 things, if parents do a good job, the child will be better.
Parents love and make children feel safe
Du Jiang and Huo Siyan once caused a hot discussion in the show, because the two often kissed in front of their son's hum. In the relatively implicit expression of feelings of the Chinese people, this form is somewhat unacceptable. However, careful observation of hum, in fact, a warm man: will take the initiative to help their mother pick out clothes, wash their feet, and often express that they love their parents very much. It can be seen that this Bourne love show is really wonderful!
In the face of "being fed dog food by parents", young babies may be jealous, older children may be shy, and older children may give a small white eye. However, these reactions are irrelevant, and most importantly, children living in love have a very sufficient sense of subconscious security, a healthy mentality, and a relatively high emotional intelligence, which are essential for a good child.
In the book "Intimate Relationship", it is mentioned that the subjective happiness of the child is the highest in the complete family of parental harmony; in the family with a very high parental conflict, even if the child's subjective happiness is reduced to negative.
Therefore, children need not only a complete family, but a complete, parental loving family!
Professional advice:
1. Show affection appropriately, so that children know that their parents are harmonious;
2. In front of the child, try to avoid disputes; do not say bad things about the other party with the child;
3. Guiding children to take more care of each other can improve children's sense of responsibility.
Support your child's dreams and give your child confidence
"Some people have dreams that seem impossible to achieve, and they never give up. They overcame all odds and finally achieved their goal." This passage comes from the British zoologist Dr. Jane Goodall. The female scientist from an ordinary family had wanted to study animals in Africa since she was a child, but there were no women in that era for such adventurous work, and her family was not wealthy, so many people laughed at her dreams. Fortunately, her mother has always said to her: "If you have a dream, you must work hard to achieve it, so that you will not regret it!" ”
Later, Goodall not only realized his dream, but also won many awards, and her mother's support was indispensable in her legendary story.
Although some of the child's dreams are childish, ridiculous, and even whimsical. But, from the child's point of view, this dream is sacred.
As the saying goes, "Thirty-six lines, lines out of shape." "It doesn't have to be a lofty dream to have meaning, and it doesn't have to be a dream that looks far from reality is a fantasy, refuse to be ironic, and guard it with heart, in order to make children full of confidence."
1. Don't rush to measure children's dreams with adult eyes, but carefully ask the reason and guide it;
2. Lead children to make plans to realize their dreams;
3. The child's cognition is expanding, and the dream will also show stages, without criticism, on the contrary, each stage can be patiently guided;
4. If the dreams of young children are really too weird, there is no need to deny it, you can use picture books, stories, homes and other ways to open up your child's horizons.
Be positive and fill your child's heart with sunshine
Parents' attitude towards life directly affects the child's three views, although "there are old and young, and there is no mortgage", but in front of the child, we must create a "positive" image.
If we always lie on the couch and play with our mobile phones in our spare time, but we blame the child with a righteous face for why we are not self-motivated, or if we get by and tell the child that "we should not be used as waste firewood", will such education be effective?
Therefore, parents must continue to create a positive atmosphere in their daily lives and influence their children in a subtle way. Positive children have a stronger sense of sunshine in their hearts, stronger ability to resist setbacks, and are more likely to succeed.
1. Parents should enrich themselves and avoid "indirect hesitation and ambition, continuous mixed eating and so on";
2. Positive does not mean that there can be no negative emotions, but to guide children to learn to channel emotions;
3, "positive" and "accept the ordinary" is not in conflict, tell the child to "do their best", but also "obey the destiny", sunshine and calm mentality in one, the child can become a big thing in the future.
Raising children is a big project, if the foundation is solid, even if there are setbacks and difficulties, children can fly against the wind. The above three things can make children "have love, dreams and sunshine", and naturally they will be better than ordinary children. Parents, got it?