Someone said, "Whether you are related by blood or not, there is only one kind of relative in this world, that is, to care for you and hurt you, and vice versa." ”
Not all are related by blood, and not every loved one is worth cherishing.
Some people look good on the surface, but in fact they are pulling you back, you have to learn to identify, away from the "good face and black heart" of the 4 types of relatives, in order to make life more smooth.
01. A meal for the New Year, see the faces of relatives
Zhao Peng was unemployed near the end of the year, and when he returned home, he did not take a plane, but bought a hard seat on the train.
He has three brothers, as the eldest, he used to buy vegetables and Chinese New Year's Eve meals for the New Year, and he would buy back a bunch of fireworks and give each child 800 years old money.
Life has a good year, there will be a famine year, the company's business is not good to lead to his unemployment, is not expected, back home Zhao Peng is in a depressed mood, the family is still waiting for him to do Chinese New Year's Eve dinner, see him for not moving, the younger brother blames him for not having the demeanor of a brother, the sister-in-law sees that he does not look good.
Only his parents will feel sorry for Zhao Peng, and his mother will take out the money he gave himself before to subsidize the family to Zhao Peng, Zhao Peng refused, he is difficult, and he does not want his parents to suffer with him.
Chinese New Year's Eve rice, or Zhao Peng bought vegetables to run, did not buy seafood, but chicken, duck and fish meat is not a lot.
The second brother said to him: "Brother, it is not me who said you, who runs Chinese New Year's Eve and rice is so shabby, it is no wonder that the work is not good." ”
The third brother also said to him: "Brother, you promised to borrow me 50,000 yuan to buy a car, when can you give it to me?" ”
They obviously knew what happened to Zhao Peng, but they still unceremoniously tore open each other's wounds, making Zhao Peng unable to bear it, standing up and leaving the dinner table.
In addition to the indifference of his brother, there is also the differential treatment of relatives, before visiting relatives in the New Year, everyone saw that Zhao Peng would reach out to greet him from afar, this time he saw him walking over, some relatives did not want to stand up in nagging.
Zhao Peng feels that his relatives are all rich, and the momentum of the chat seems to have received hundreds of millions of large projects, but from the logic full of loopholes, it can be seen that they are all bragging.
He did not understand that he had only encountered difficulties, and did not open his mouth to borrow money from others, why many relatives would snub him, perhaps this is the inflammatory situation.
In the face of economic strength, it is best to see a person's true face.
02. The four types of relatives should be kept away, and no matter how close the blood is
When people reach middle age, they must learn to stay away from the following four types of relatives.
1. Relatives who climb high and step low.
Some relatives have average abilities but will treat guests differently.
Zhao Peng met, he went to his aunt's house as a guest, the aunt and the little aunt were in a village, he first went to the aunt's house.
When the aunt saw him coming, she simply said hello and played with the mobile phone, and Zhao Peng stood bored, so she resigned and went to the aunt's house.
The aunt left him to eat, although there were not many dishes, but the aunt knew that he liked to eat dumplings, and specially wrapped a portion for him, which made Zhao Peng very moved.
He used to go to relatives, rarely ate at the aunt's house, the aunt will prepare a table of hearty meals, he will naturally stay in the aunt's house, now I know that the aunt is a very real person, although the family economic conditions are average, but she is sincere to everyone.
After he left, the aunt brought out the meal to entertain another group of relatives, and also let Zhao Peng see that when he fell, even the relatives would be snubbed.
Some relatives will surround you when you are lucky, and when you have a bad time, they will pour cold water on your head to let you see the cold and warm of human feelings.
Never overestimate your place in the other person's heart, and don't underestimate the evil of human nature.
The only thing you need to do is be self-reliant and stay away from these people who climb high and low.
2. Relatives who value their interests very much.
Some relatives take money very seriously, say a lot of good things when they ask you to borrow money, and when you go to ask for money, they turn their faces and don't recognize people.
Zhao Peng originally lent 20,000 yuan to his uncle's eldest cousin, and 5 years have passed, and the other party has never taken the initiative to say that he will repay the money.
If he can live a good life, Zhao Peng will not urge him to pay back the money, but he has no income, considering the child's tuition, he will call his eldest cousin to discuss and ask if he can repay part of it first.
As a result, the eldest cousin became angry and asked, "Why are you so snobbish?" Such a little money urges you, you don't want to think, when you lived in my house when you were a child, my mother asked you for money? This little money should be a filial piety to your aunt. ”
Zhao Peng was very depressed, of course, he remembered his aunt's kindness to himself, but filial piety to the elders was a matter from the heart, and could not be forced, and when his cousin borrowed money, he did not say that he would not pay it back, and now it was obviously a strong word.
In life, people like cousins are not alone, he takes money very seriously, squanders when he has money, looks for relatives to borrow when he has no money, and says very well when he borrows money, but you want him to pay back the money, there is no way.
You get too close to him, there is no benefit, when it is beneficial to him, it is a relative, once you ask the other party to pay back, even if you offend him, such a relative, it is better to stay away.
3. I can't see your relatives
Keigo Higashino said, "There are two things in this world that cannot be looked at directly, one is the sun and the other is the human heart. ”
There is a kind of relative around you, who is not good to see you.
Mo Yan encountered such a thing, he and his cousin have a good relationship, after the work won the award, he went home to tell this good news to his relatives, originally thought that he would get everyone's blessing.
Unexpectedly, the cousin's face was full of disdain, indicating that Mo Yan had just gone a long way, and if he participated, there might be nothing for the other party.
He also went around telling people about his cousin's previous troubles and elevating himself in this way.
The human heart, like the abyss, cannot be looked at directly, and the closer the person is, the deeper it will hurt you.
You are not having a good life, he feels relieved, you are living well, but it will cause the other party's jealousy, such relatives can not be reasonable, only to stay away.
4. Relatives without integrity
We are not afraid of distant opponents, afraid of relatives without integrity.
People like you tend to commit a lot to you and swear to unfounded things.
If you trust the other person, you are likely to disappoint yourself.
I met, came home for the New Year, I washed the car in advance, ready to go to relatives to use.
On the second day of the Chinese New Year, my cousin came to borrow a car and said that he was going to my mother-in-law's house, knowing that I was returning to my mother-in-law's house on the third day of the first year, I wanted to use the car first, to ensure that the money would be sent back at 3 p.m., and promised to add 200 pieces of oil.
Seeing that he was so serious, I believed him, so I gave him the car keys, watched him drive out, and the mother-in-law came back from outside, regretting that she was late and did not stop borrowing the car.
At first, I laughed at my mother-in-law for being too nervous, and she told me, "If you don't understand him, he's just a dishonest person." ”
Sure enough, until dark, the cousin did not come back, called him, and shut down. The next day, I could only take a taxi back to my mother's house, not to mention how angry I was.
I think of the words of a writer: "I was originally enthusiastic, but the world is cold, people's hearts are unpredictable, and finally I ended up being deceived." ”
Write at the back:
Life is the process of gradually recognizing oneself.
We treat others with kindness, but kindness must have a bottom line in order to better protect ourselves.
Some relatives are with you, and they don't know how to treat others with sincerity, put interests in front, and leave feelings and righteousness behind.
Smart people, who know how to do subtraction, spend more time with sentient people, and stay away from those relatives who are kind and dark-hearted.
First talk about love and righteousness, and then talk about relatives, life will be more and more comfortable.
Give yourself a thumbs up! Have you gone to relatives for the New Year?