Children and parents as the closest people, parents always hope to be able to understand the child's inner thoughts, the latest dynamics, but the child is more and more resistant to communicating with parents, parents in the complaint of children at the same time, should also reflect on whether there is a problem with their own communication methods, resulting in children prematurely closed the door of the heart.
This is also the case with the friend's child Lele, some of the things about Lele are known to friends from other people's mouths, and when asked about Lele, the child does not say anything.
Friends don't know why lele's relationship with his parents is so stiff, and he doesn't need his parents' help even when he has difficulties.
Friends want to change their relationship with their children, but they don't know where to start.
01 Why children are reluctant to communicate with their parents
Every time a child communicates with his parents, he will hear the voice of his parents criticizing and scolding, and he will never get equal communication, causing children to be bored of communicating with their parents, and they would rather tell their hearts to friends or strangers than say more to their parents.
Every day when I come home, I shut myself in the house, never come out except for eating and going to the toilet, no matter how my parents ask, my children will not tell my parents about my recent situation and heart.
As parents, you should reflect on the way you communicate with your children at this time, and what causes serious problems.
02 Do not have the patience to listen to the child, and are accustomed to ignoring the child's thoughts
Children in the young age, very much like to communicate with their parents, but why with the increase of age, there be began to be a situation of not loving to communicate with parents, the reason comes from the parents themselves.
Children's thinking is relatively simple, and they like to repeat one thing, especially the love to ask the truth, which is a huge test for parents' patience.
If parents do not have the patience to communicate with their children, then it will discourage the child's interest, which will open up the distance between parents and children, and the child will begin to no longer love to communicate with parents.
This is the biggest root cause of children's lack of communication with parents, and it is precisely parents who have no patience for their children and often ignore their children's ideas, resulting in a growing gap between children and parents.
03 Children are always wrong, parents are always right
In addition to the problems of communication between parents and children, the arbitrariness of parents is also one of the important reasons for children not to love communication, children's ideas and cognition in young age are very naïve, and parents always feel that their ideas are correct, and children's ideas are ridiculous.
This is the root cause of discouraging the child's enthusiasm, destroying his ability to think independently, and making the child refuse to communicate with his parents.
Although the child is still young, his ideas are also very naïve and ridiculous.
But every child grows up from this process, and we, as parents, will also go through such a process, so respecting the child's ideas, respecting his opinions, and guiding him correctly on top of his ideas is an effective way to solve communication problems.
04 Do not empathize with the child's sore spots
When children communicate with their parents, they usually carry their own questions and incomprehensions, and need parents to give guidance and analysis, but many parents are mechanically answering their children's questions and cannot form empathy with their children.
How parents should get along with their children
Parents and children have a good relationship, can cultivate children's good character, children grow up in a loving environment, in order to have the ability to love themselves and love others, parents should learn to get along with their children, so that the parent-child relationship can be more intimate.
01 Be a listener for your child
The real meaning of communication with children is first of all based on listening, only parents listen carefully to their children's ideas and understand their children's needs.
Only in order to enter the child's heart and form empathy with the child, the child can also understand the relevant truth through communication with the parents, and learn to think independently and solve problems.
02 Communicate with children on an equal footing
Parents should pay attention to their own attitude when communicating with their children, all communication should be based on equality, even if the child's idea is very wrong, but also to recognize the child's cognitive limitations, only such respect, can form effective communication.
Although the reason is simple, many parents have difficulty controlling their hearts.
Therefore, as a parent, we must take every communication between children and themselves seriously, and it is best to let children realize some truths in each communication.
Parents think that the child is their own biological, even if the parent-child relationship problem is temporary, this idea is not correct, when the parent-child relationship has a problem, not repaired in time, will lead to the relationship more and more rigid.
To the point of irreparability, it makes parents even more sad.
Parents as elders, when getting along with their children, they must also respect and understand, only in this way, children are willing to communicate with parents, and confide in parents about their hearts and problems, so that the parent-child relationship can become more and more harmonious.
| Proverbs 22:6|
To raise a child, to make him walk the path of the profession, even when he is old, he will not deviate.