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How many lovers in life are separated because they can't talk about the bride price when they get married? Many people may feel that it is a pity that such a situation has occurred, after all, two people have been together for so long, and they have reached the stage of talking about marriage and marriage, and they must have feelings.
But in fact, if there is no consensus on even the bride price, it means that two people are not suitable at all. Whether the love is deep or not, whether the personality, three views and family are matched, it is a potential hidden danger.
If you forcibly get married, sooner or later it will break out again.
Marriage is not a matter of two people, but a matter of two families, if the door is not right, there will be differences and contradictions on many issues, so that two different people get married, it is difficult to have real happiness.
From this point of view, those who find that the two are not suitable before marriage and choose to separate decisively are actually avoiding risks for the future, which is a rare vision.
Liu Jia once talked about a seven-year-long love, her love with her boyfriend from campus to society, and when she reached the age of talking about marriage, she was bent on the future of a happy life of joint efforts.
Who knows, when the two sides talked about the dowry and the bride price, there was an irreconcilable contradiction.
Liu Jia knows that her boyfriend's family conditions are not rich, compared to the dowry of more than 300,000 people around her, she only asks the man to give 100,000, and she also has a dowry. She felt that she didn't want much, and if they weren't willing to give, they could only say that they had no sincerity in wanting to get married.
However, the boyfriend said that his parents did not agree, and helplessly advised Liu Li not to pay the bride price, after all, the two will live together in the future, the most important thing is the feelings, he also said:
"My mother said that talking about money hurts feelings, you don't want to be so materialistic."
Talking about money hurts feelings, it is these five words that end their seven years of love.
Because Liu Li felt that from this incident, it could be seen that the feelings between the two people were not as deep as she thought. Moreover, if the boyfriend has no opinion on this matter, it means that in their family, the mother has the final say, then he is likely to be a mother treasure man.
Can such a person protect himself completely? Even if you are really married, can you really be happy after marriage?
Later, Liu Li frankly told her boyfriend that whether it is a bride price or a dowry is the common property of two people, she can understand your parents' hardships, and hope that you can understand her parents.
Liu Li was bent on considering the marriage between the two, but was considered by the boyfriend's parents to have many eyes and love to calculate, and finally the marriage was not resolved.
One: Money, to a certain extent, can measure a person's sincerity
If women endlessly extort money from men, they will be labeled as gold worshippers by the outside world, and if they do not skimp on giving money to men, they are also eager to be cherished and respected by the other party.
Money is only a part of the setbacks in love, if the two can't even handle the problem of money properly, even if they are barely married, the small things in the future will be unbearable.
The famous writer Yi Shu wrote in "Xi Bao":
"I want a lot of love, if there is no love, then a lot of money, if there is no two, it is good to have health." 」
It is difficult to find a partner in this world who satisfies their own requirements one hundred percent, and both men and women, if they want to find true love, they cannot help but compromise and understand.
Two: Two people who are really suitable will have three views and equal thoughts
True love is to love without preconditions from the perspective of the details of life and the heart, and to love each other irrepressibly.
The two people who are really suitable for marriage must be three views of the same, the ideas are equal, they have common goals and pursuits, and they can reach consensus on many issues.
Not only that, but there will also be mutual respect, tolerance and understanding because of deep love for each other.
In this case, no matter what kind of thing you encounter, you can think calmly and judge rationally, so as to clear the obstacles on the road of feelings and have true happiness.
Maugham wrote a very philosophical passage in The Veil:
"I never know why people fall in love with another person. Maybe we all have a gap in our hearts, it's a hollow, whistling cold wind into the soul, so we desperately need a heart of perfect shape to fill it.
Even if you are a perfect perfect circle like the sun, the gap in my heart may be a crooked and jagged shape, so you can't fill it. ”
In his view, true love is the fit of the soul, that is, to find the other half that fits his heart, which requires two people who love each other to understand each other and respect each other.
Otherwise, no matter how reluctant you are, it will be difficult to harvest true happiness.
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