Book Review: Open the way out of happiness

China Xiaokang Network Exclusive Article

Wen | Qingfei

The book "The Way Out of Happiness" is a collection of articles on love and marriage launched by Sanlian Life Weekly. The book is divided into "History of Love Marriage Entanglement" and "What is the Story of Your Love?" Marriage is a daily necessity, not an ornament" This first, middle and second part of the three main parts, contains writers in different professional fields from the perspective of philosophy, psychology, sociology and other aspects of the analysis of love and marriage rules.

If you want to get the "panacea" or "martial arts cheats" of happy love and marriage by reading this book, it may disappoint you. But if you want to understand the origin of marriage and love, recognize the many myths and fantasies attached to love and marriage, and truly understand the true meaning of marriage and love, then this book is an excellent way.

The "Love Triangle Theory" model identifies the three elements that make up love: intimacy, passion, and commitment. The different combinations of these three elements constitute a variety of love relationships, but complete love must be a combination of the three. It's just that this theory can't answer some of the more critical questions about love, so Steinberg gave the simple but meaningful answer that "love is a story."

Since love has become a kind of story narrative, then each story must have a preset theme, as Chen Sai pointed out in the text, "the themes that have the deepest impact on us are often the most personal experiences (usually painful experiences)". This is also why some people always attract the same type of bad men/women, because they have never changed the preset theme of their love story, and have been looking for the same type of people to interpret their preset love story, so the story becomes a reality.

Understand this, you will understand that love will always face tests and temptations, because you will be like a bear breaking corn, always expecting that the next person will be more in line with your love story, or there will be a better love story waiting for you in the future. But positive psychology tells us that the success of love is not whether you find the perfect other half, but to water and nurture our love tree with your heart, share the details of each other's lives, share your joys, sorrows, interests, knowledge, humor, etc., and give each other the things that have vitality.

This puts forward a relatively easy way for us to manage intimate relationships, as long as you clarify the preset theme of your love story, clear the fog, scatter illusions, understand your own story, and adjust your story in a timely manner, with a "more pragmatic, healthier, non-instinctive" attitude to manage love and marriage, you can really find a happy way out.

New book information

"Southern Expedition and Northern War - Guo Songmin Film and Television Review Self-Selected Collection"

Author: Guo Songmin

Publisher: Sanchen Film Library Audio-Visual Publishing House

Price: 96 yuan

The author uses the perspectives of historical materialism and dialectical materialism to analyze film and television works.

《Qingcheng》

Author: Xu Zechen

Publisher: Beijing October Literature and Art Publishing House

Price: 39.8 yuan

The novel collection "Qingcheng" includes two novellas created by writer Xu Zechen, "Xixia" and "Juyan", and the short story of the same name, "Qingcheng".

First Person Singular

Author: Haruki Murakami (Japanese)

Publisher: Flower City Press

Price: 56 yuan

Three years after the publication of the novel "Assassination of the Knight Commander", Haruki Murakami's latest collection of short stories in 2021.

("Xiaokang", China Xiaokang Network Exclusive Special Article)

This article was published in the late December 2021 issue of Xiaokang