Author | There is a book in mind
Source | There is a book (ID: youshucc)
Anchor | Fan Deng Reading · Smell delight
The hit drama "Little Minjia" has finally ushered in the grand finale.
This urban emotional drama adapted from The novel of the same name in Yibei focuses on the theme of middle-aged marriage, which has aroused heated discussion as soon as it was launched, and has been frequently on the hot search list until now.
In the emotional story of Xiao Min's family, it seems that every middle-aged person can see his own shadow from it.
Liu Xiaomin, who is crisp and neat, cannot forget the trauma of a failed marriage, she longs for love and is afraid of marriage.
Li Ping, who is competitive and competitive, rejects mediocrity and desires to be brilliant, and actively strives to live but still fails to achieve her wishes.
Liu Xiaojie, who is spontaneous and naïve, loves warmly and hates boldly, and walks through the ups and downs, only to find that the original plain and plain is the truth.
Leaving and compounding, troughs and bravery, the encounters of everyone in the play are all the epitome of our adult emotional world.
Among them, the 4 hidden truths of marriage are even more vividly analyzed by the emotional reality of middle-aged people.
Young people do not know the taste of sorrow, and middle-aged people know that everything is difficult.
When people reach middle age, life will inevitably have uneven folds, and marriage will also encounter cross-currents and shoals.
Whether you can cross the bumps and smooth the bumps depends on whether the parties are willing to hold on.
As the soul of the whole play, Liu Xiaomin and Chen Zhuo's marriage has been twisted and turned, which has touched the nerves of many people.
On the day after receiving the certificate, Xiao Min hummed a small song and looked at the marriage certificate of the two, and Chen Zhuo quipped:
"Pinch me, and I'll see if I'm dreaming?"
Don't look at the two of them now sweet and sweet, but before this also experienced many ups and downs.
Because most middle-aged people carry heavy bags on their bodies and carry weights forward.
Like all middle-aged couples, remarried XiaoMin and Chen Zhuo are also facing many pressures in life.
Children are about to take the college entrance examination, in order not to affect the children, they can only put away their feelings and do "underground work".
Although Liu Xiaomin has been single for many years, she has never stepped out of the shadow of the original failed feelings.
She was afraid of marriage, and she didn't want to have anything to do with the people of the past.
Chen Zhuo's middle-aged entrepreneurship is extremely difficult, so busy that he has no time to eat a serious meal, and can only use instant noodles to make up.
Coupled with the overlap of each other's social circles and intricate interpersonal relationships, their feelings are even more stinging.
Fortunately, Chen Zhuo did not give up because of the difficulties, but tried his best to eliminate contradictions and resolve conflicts.
When Xiao Min is not ready, he can wait and persevere with patience and patience.
I can also go downstairs to Xiao Min's house in the middle of the night to directly express my heart.
And Liu Xiaomin is also brave enough, hearing that Chen Zhuo's career needs, she offered to help.
Mutual support and companionship along the way have also made the feelings of the two people deeper and deeper, and they have become each other's "comrades-in-arms".
As Tu Lei said:
"Marriage is not based on light talk, but on long-term behavior and giving."
A truly long-lasting marriage relies not only on love, but also on perseverance.
Of course, the persistence in marriage is not to die, but not to leave regrets for yourself.
Proper persistence is the fuel of feelings, but also the glue of marriage.
There was a hot topic on the Internet:
"Will you maintain an unhappy marriage for your children?"
The comments section has an answer that impressed me:
"Knowing that marriage is a grave, do you still want to pull your children in for burial?"
It is true that children may be a bridge of feelings, but they are by no means the shackles of marriage.
The most scolded person in the play is Jin Bo.
He was once the "little prince of Jiujiang" that everyone envied, but after his father's factory closed, Jin Bo's career plummeted.
After the investment failed and owed a debt of 400,000 yuan, he defected to his ex-wife Liu Xiaomin in the name of sending something to his son.
When he saw that Liu Xiaomin had a stable career, a good income, and a small house, Jin Bo began to think carefully.
He wanted to use his son to tie Liu Xiaomin tightly and achieve the purpose of remarriage and repay debts.
Therefore, Jin Bo coaxed his son to live in Liu Xiaomin's house with a dead face, saying that he would move out when he found a job.
But he never seriously looked for a job, but constantly lobbied his son, brokered them to remarry, and even instigated his son:
"Your mother has strong self-esteem, you have to go from far to near, slowly, and layered..."
Unfortunately, the son was very sober and refused: "You are no longer on the same road." ”
Liu Xiaomin is not confused, no matter how Much jin bo pleases, flatters, and sells misery, she always looks at each other coldly.
In the adult world, in addition to children, there is love and responsibility.
I remembered a sentence that Yang Lan said:
"The strongest bond in marriage is not children, not money, but the common growth of the spirit."
When you are helpless and weak, give you the strength of love and a warm hug.
When you are depressed and depressed, accompany you to share the wind and rain and watch for happiness.
And this is the true meaning of marriage.
The British writer Alain De Botton once said:
"We're always obsessed with finding the perfect partner and starting a satisfying relationship.
When getting married, there is no readiness to put up with differences. ”
Yes, love can be picky, but marriage needs to be understood and accepted.
If you blindly pursue perfection, you can only hurt yourself in the end.
Li Ping has been competitive since she was a child, admiring vanity, and always wants to find a rich man and live a glamorous and beautiful life as Mrs. Kuo.
Ex-husband Chen Zhuo was originally a bully and had outstanding abilities, but he longed for a simple and ordinary life.
Unwilling to be mediocre, Li Ping decisively divorced and married Hong Wei, a businessman who was also ambitious and dared to break through, and she also became a director of several major companies.
Hong Wei satisfied all her beautiful visions of marriage, status, identity, money, romance, Li Ping all had.
The only fly in the ointment is that they have no children, but Hong Wei said:
"We don't want children in this life, and I can't see you suffering from that sin."
Li Ping was touched, loved Hong Wei wholeheartedly, and spared no effort to help him fight for his career.
But no matter how gorgeous the robe, it is inevitable to climb on the lice and get dirty.
After Hong Wei was imprisoned for tax evasion, Li Ping was told that he had a 5-year-old illegitimate child abroad, born not long after their marriage.
For a time, Li Ping's career collapsed, her marriage broke down, and her relatives and friends rebelled, and only her ex-husband Chen Zhuo reached out to her.
At this point, she truly understood that it was not that her ex was not perfect, but that she herself was too demanding.
As Fu Lei said:
"Is there any perfect person or thing in the world?"
Ask yourself, how perfect are you? ”
People to middle age, whose marriages do not have a few emotional garbage.
What really makes people uncomfortable is not the emotional garbage itself, but the inner non-acceptance.
Only by learning to understand can we hold the hand of our son and grow old with it.
Only by knowing how to accept can we be willing to win the hearts of a person, and the white head is not separated.
When I was young, I always thought that the love that was stirring was the starting point of a happy marriage.
When people reach middle age, after years of vicissitudes, the love of the long stream is the sweetest touch:
"Don't eat cold chestnuts, take the warm wind and blow it, eat cold stomach discomfort."
"If you're in a bad mood, come and give me a hug, and I'll take you somewhere."
"Don't rush downstairs, it's windy today, you don't freeze"
"You can't stop eating when you're angry, and when you're full, it's warmer."
……
Chen Zhuo and Liu Xiaomin get along with each other, simple and simple, without too many surprises, but inexplicably make people comfortable and warm.
There is no youthful enthusiasm for young people to fall in love, but more of a daily companionship.
Middle-aged feelings inevitably stumble, and chen zhuo and Liu Xiaomin's feelings have been shelved for a while.
At the time of separation, the eyes of the two were red and red.
Two people have long become each other's spiritual pillars, and neither can be separated from the other.
Although life seems to change day after day, they care about each other and pay attention to each other, making every day different.
As a netizen in the bullet screen said:
"Life is like a left hand, but who's to say it's not another romance."
Because, under the eaves of the earthly world, the heartbeat can only be maintained for a moment, but the heart can stay together for a lifetime.
All we pursue throughout our lives is a marriage of peace of mind:
Do not seek the ups and downs of the vigorous, only the left hand touching the right hand of the steady keeping.
Do not seek the earth-shattering mountain alliance sea oath, only the ordinaryness of chai rice oil, salt and vinegar.
Do not seek passionate ears and warm feelings, but only look like water for years.
I've seen a story.
The Zen master asked the disciple how to get rid of the weeds in the clearing.
Some use shovels, some scatter lime, some burn, and some simply uproot.
The Zen master laughed and said nothing.
In the autumn, the disciple found that his field was still overgrown with weeds, and the Zen master's field was a golden crop.
It turns out that the best way is to let the heart not be barren, and the weeds have nowhere to take root.
In fact, the land is like this, and so is marriage.
The beginning of every marriage is a vibrant wilderness.
But after years, there will always be weeds and wind and rain.
Especially when people reach middle age, shoulder their careers and carry their lives, perhaps there are constant disputes, and perhaps there is an undercurrent.
But as long as there is perseverance in the heart, there is the belief of compromise, there is the trust of understanding, and there is the confidence of not abandoning, the wilderness of married life will never be weeded and full of love.
The recommendation of "Little Minjia" reads:
"Marriage is far from defining our lives, but love can."
There is no happy ending in life, and there is no perfect choice for marriage.
The important thing is to recognize the truth and still love it; to endure the storm and still be brave.
Even if the future of marriage is unknown, at least it can be said without regret:
In the present, I cherish; in the future, I do not regret it.
Click "watching", may you have the courage to cut through thorns in your thorny middle-aged life, hand in hand for a lifetime, and grow old!
Typography | Zheng to the north
Image | The pictures in this article come from the stills of "Xiao MinJia", which was invaded and deleted
Music | "Piano Song of the Night" three inches of paradise