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The feelings of middle age have long bid farewell to the ignorant period of the initial opening of the love sinus, and have also bid farewell to the stage of your and my love. From flowers and roses to tea rice oil and salt, the feelings of middle-aged people are permeated with the bland authenticity of glitz and fading, and they are also mixed with the pressure and responsibility of the old and the young.
Therefore, the love of middle-aged people is a more mature love and a more rational love.
Young people do not dare to talk about money easily when they are in love, and they must conceal and modify each other's family situation and economic level. Because the love of youth is too green, fragile love, it is difficult to withstand the challenges and torture of reality.
When people reach middle age, most of them already have a certain amount of savings, and more than the collision of two hearts, they must consider the integration of the two families. Therefore, money has become a factor that must be considered in the face of love, and those who dare to talk about money are more rational and wise people.
After all, there is nothing wrong with loving money, and there is nothing wrong with caring about money, this is not the market, but the guarantee and confidence of life.
One: Talking about money is the touchstone of feelings
In the hit drama "Xiao Shede", Grandpa Nan Jianlong, played by Zhang Guoguo, wanted to add Huan Huan's name to the real estate certificate for the sake of his granddaughter Huan Huan's schooling.
According to the procedure, in addition to his signing consent, he also needs to get the signature of his wife, his second wife Cai Juying.
After communicating with her daughter, Cai Juying hopes that her name can also be on the property deed.
However, the old couple quarreled over this. From Nan Jianlong's standpoint, this is his premarital property and should not add Cai Juying's name.
But from Cai Juying's point of view, she has served this person for most of her life, and once this person is gone, the house is gone, and she doesn't even have a place to live.
From the beginning of the matter of adding a name to Fang Ben, it later evolved into Cai Juying's feeling that she had been an outsider for so many years, so she was discouraged, ran away from home, and cried sadly in a small hotel outside alone.
In fact, this problem comes down to the end, because the old couple has never talked openly about real estate and money, Cai Juying has no sense of security, and Nan Jianlong has not respected her.
When people talk about feelings in middle age, they often have to face the combination of two families, so the different economic levels and living conditions between families should be mentioned in the front. This is both a responsibility for each other's family and a responsibility for feelings.
People who dare to talk about money are often sincere and frank, and he is not afraid of the other party to know his "bottom line", because no matter how much money is less, this is the beginning of the two people creating a happy life together in the future.
When people reach middle age, they have long bid farewell to the innocent years of "sentient drinking water".
Each other has parents to be kind to, and may also have children to raise, and it is wiser and more far-sighted to take money, which seems to be the most difficult thing to talk about, to discuss in advance and put it on the table to communicate.
The road is long, and what is needed for a lifetime is the most sincere love.
But people's hearts are complex, and between "true" and "unreal", there are too many distractions of human nature. Therefore, bravely talking about money is a measure of each other's view of money, and it is also an assessment of each other's real conditions.
In this era when everything advocates fast-paced, talking about money is both a responsibility for each other and a test of feelings.
Two: Talking about money can make feelings concrete
Maybe the love of young people is still addicted to the wind and snow of you and me, and the feelings of adults have long been specific to "who picks up the children after work today", "where to go back to the New Year next spring" and so on, these small things.
Adult feelings have always been plain and real, and they will not float in the air to make people suffer from gains and losses, and they will not be buried deep in the seabed so that they cannot be touched or caught.
Therefore, the love of middle-aged people needs some specific things to pull love off the altar, and needs some things to land to ensure that they can stay together for a lifetime.
Among the many options, there is no doubt that talking about money is the best one.
I often hear people joking about "don't talk about money, talk about how vulgar money is", middle-aged people laughed, because most of the people who said this were young people who had just fallen in love.
What love is, love is Cupid holding the arrow of love, shooting two strange souls together, making them intimate and hand in hand. But who is Cupid, he was a child in ancient Roman mythology.
Letting a child decide whether the love of two people is going to happen or not is in itself wonderful and illusory.
No matter who it is, it should make the illusory love into a concrete life, especially the middle-aged people, and they should embrace love rationally and maturely. Of all the actions that make "I love you" concrete, talking about money is the most direct and effective.
Each other's savings, what kind of gifts they hope to receive during the New Year's Holiday, the financial habits they have been, the family's economic conditions, etc., these details in getting along can not only make the two people close the distance between each other, but also make the deep love that has been suspended in the air before become more realistic and more grounded.
The famous Russian writer Dostoevsky once said a famous quote about love:
"Love concrete people, don't love abstract people; love life, don't love the meaning of life."
I hope that each of us can love rationally, not love romantic fantasies, but love real life, which is meaningful and worth pursuing.
END