Some time ago, an Asian boy named Yuan Qiaochu, a master's degree graduate of MIT, sent 35 tweets in a row to accuse his parents of raising himself into a giant baby.
He tweeted under the screen name "Magnificent Adult Baby." Graduated from a prestigious school for three years, with sound limbs, no job, no friends, no purpose in life, and infected with the vice of drug use.
The content of his accusation is striking:
"My parents used money to create a world for me and protect me from harm, they didn't even let me do housework, I was spoiled, and in retrospect, it didn't do me much good."
"I have recognized that the law of social survival is to make a living through labor, but I have never done it, and I feel extremely ashamed."
"I've been avoiding the fact that my parents are the breadwinners, and my dad is angry because I'm going to postpone retirement and my mom is giving me a $100,000 birthday present, and they're reminding me of that fact."
"My relationship with my parents is maintained by money, and the most important thing for me is not to make my parents unhappy, so that I will never be short of money to spend."
"I want to go to a psychiatrist, and I want to make sure that 'My parents give me money because they love me.'"
……
While enjoying the superior material life provided by his parents, he complained that his parents manipulated themselves with money. Even if his father delayed retirement because of this, he did not thank Dade, but doubted whether his parents loved him. It's unbelievable.
The child that the parents have worked so hard to raise thinks that they have given him the best of everything, but the child is full of resentment towards the parents while eating the old man with peace of mind.
What a sad parent, seeing such an accusation, will the parents vomit blood?
But who is to blame for all this? Every nibbler and white-eyed wolf is something we have worked so hard to cultivate.
How many parents in the process of raising their children, afraid that their children will suffer a little, afraid that their children will do something. Many parents save money themselves, but they give everything to their children.
They think that we have worked so hard to create all this in order to make our children live better? What's wrong with that?
For more than ten years, more than twenty years of life, all the trivial things in life have nothing to do with children.
How many parents believe that in their children's lives, in addition to learning, or learning, everything else will not let their children interfere. Good grades are king, nothing else matters, and even for the sake of grades, you can do whatever it takes.
However, as the child grows up, the parents find that if they want the child to do something, they can't move at all, and they are too lazy to be surprised.
More and more children are unwilling to go to work after graduation, more and more children do not want to do anything, they take it for granted.
There are even 29-year-old men who have sued their parents, hoping that the state will introduce laws to make them feel at ease and let their parents have the crime of not supporting them.
There is a social psychological effect called Babe's Law, which states that when a person experiences a strong stimulus, the stimulus given again becomes insignificant.
If giving is a stimulus, then blindly giving, the other party will feel taken for granted. Whether it is between parents and children, or between husband and wife, we often see this phenomenon.
One party is willing to give unconditionally, and the other party will turn a blind eye and be insensitive.
When it comes to letting children do housework, many parents are very dismissive, does this kind of thing still need to be learned? The student's main task is to learn, and when he grows up, he will naturally do things, as if it were a matter of course.
Learning such a complicated thing will be done, will there still be housework? Some people even feel that what to do by raising their children so diligently will be the loss of their own children after they become a family.
If all parents think like this, then after the two children become a family, who will do the housework? Everyone is used to the days of clothes to reach out and eat to open their mouths, who wants to bow down to serve others?
Some people say that you can ask for a babysitter, you can go to a restaurant, order takeaway? Young people have just stepped into society, how many people are financially strong, where is the spare money to hire a nanny?
Isn't this forcing the children to eat the old? Isn't the end result asking parents for money and making them their own free nannies?
In the process of raising a child, it is necessary to properly summon the child and arrange for him to do things. From an early age, let him do what he can and develop the habit of taking the initiative to do things.
Learning to use children and let children do housework is actually beneficial.
First, exercise the ability to take care of life and develop good living habits.
Children who do housework from an early age generally have strong hands-on ability and strong self-care ability.
Pack your own school bags, tidy up your room, don't lose everything, and do things more organized. When I go out to study and live in school in the future, my adaptability is also relatively strong.
Second, self-confidence is fostered.
Children gain self-confidence in their labor and feel that they can do anything. Parents allow their children to try to do their own things from an early age, and he will feel that it is a recognition of his own ability.
Third, learn to be considerate of parents and be grateful to parents.
In the process of doing things, children will know the hard work of doing things, and can they understand their parents' efforts for themselves. Only then will you know that life is not easy, making money is not easy, and learn to cherish.
The more you do the hand-shaking treasurer, the more you don't know that the other party is hard, and it seems that everything is easy. Slightly unsatisfactory, but complained.
Fourth, proper housework is a combination of work and leisure, which helps to improve learning efficiency.
As parents, they often deceive themselves, thinking that if they lock their children up in school, in training classes, and in the study, they feel at ease, thinking that they are studying seriously, "ignoring things outside the window with both ears, and reading only the books of the sages."
However, all day long, up to more than ten hours of learning, children may have been so efficient learning? Can you do it yourself?
Properly doing housework is actually a kind of adjustment, so that mental work and physical labor are combined.
Fifth, proper housework helps to cultivate a sense of responsibility and is conducive to the harmony of children's family relations in the future.
Many mothers complain about widowed parenting while letting their children do nothing, do you want your future daughter-in-law and future son-in-law to continue their own life patterns?
Housework is the business of each family member, and in each person's efforts, there will be a sense of responsibility for the family and will cherish the family relationship.
Sixth, let children develop the habit of doing things down-to-earth, rather than being ambitious.
Some time ago, there was a statistic that nearly 70% of the surveyed post-00s thought that they would earn millions of dollars a year within ten years, and they did not know how many people had reached this standard by working hard for a lifetime.
Start small, so that you don't expect pie to fall from the sky, and you won't have a low eye. Don't think that our children are all people who do big things, there is no need to do small things, and most people end up being ordinary people, like you and me.
In addition to letting children do things, we must be moderate in the material aspects of children and cannot blindly meet material needs.
Now many people believe in the concept of "rich children", "rich support" mainly refers to spiritual enrichment, rather than material people do not refuse, there is a response. Loving children is not an unprincipled spoiled child.
All in all, children are made big, not spoiled. Big children are talents, and spoiled children are wasted talents.