Meng Meng's mother traveled for two days, went home and opened her daughter's bedroom, she was dumbfounded: the child's room, is this robbed?
Clothes and socks were thrown all over the floor, books and stationery were scattered on the tabletop, and open snack bags were scattered all over the floor... Seeing this, the mother was so angry that she didn't call a place, and when her daughter came home, it was a bit of a nagging.
"Two-graders, won't they all clean up their own houses?" Do you want me to take a photo and send it to your class group, so that teachers and classmates can see the sloppiness under your beautiful appearance? ”
Listening to her mother's rebuke, Meng Meng did not have a little shame, but instead righteously said back to her mother:
"Don't you usually help me clean up?" I can't clean again! Besides, Dad is also at home, so why can't he clean up? ”
Looking at her daughter's words, her mother was suddenly dumbfounded by the question.
First, the psychology of mothers to know: no child is born to love to clean up
This scene actually happened in many families. Many parents are sighing: Why do today's children not do housework at all?
In fact, no child in this world is born to love to clean up! Especially for today's children, the living conditions are generally superior, a child six parents are painful, pampered family environment, more let the children become lazy and do not love to clean up.
To sum up, children do not like to do housework, there are two main reasons.
1) Not loving to clean up is innate inertia
Inertia is a temperament that everyone is born with, and children are the same, unwilling to put their energy into labor. This is not only because tidying up requires manual labor, but also requires constant summarization and thinking, testing mental work.
Compared with "play" can make children feel happy, snacks can satisfy children's taste buds, "tidying up" this thing is too boring for children. If the child does not get the "benefit" from it, he will naturally show a lazy appearance, which is the fundamental reason why the child is unwilling to clean up.
2) Don't like to clean up, stemming from the habits developed from childhood
Just like meng meng in the text, her mother has arranged her bedroom from a young age, and Meng Meng has not had the habit of cleaning up since she was a child, and naturally she will not think of taking the initiative to clean up during her mother's business trip.
If the habit is formed, not only will she not clean up when she is seven or eight years old, but when she grows up to eighteen years old and sees that the room is messy, she may not think of cleaning up.
In fact, the responsibility for this problem is not in Meng Meng, but in the mother.
Second, don't be reluctant to use children, it is very important to do housework from primary school!
When it comes to "doing housework", many parents are like family treasures:
"When we were as young as you, we washed dishes, washed clothes, mopped the floor, cooked, and did everything!" What are the good conditions like you are now, you don't have to do anything, as long as you study, you still can't get the results, is it worth us? ”
In order to let the child concentrate on learning, many parents take on all the housework, parents think that by trying to buy their children time to learn, the child can do good results, but the facts will tell you: if you want your child to become an elite, doing housework is a very important way.
The famous education reformer Wei Shusheng once mentioned in his speech that the first thing he did when he became the director of the Panjin City Education Bureau was to implement the educational measures for children to do housework: children have time to do more, no time to do less, but they cannot do housework.
Many people do not understand that Wei Shusheng is the director of education, why is it not the study of examinations, not further education, not scores, but doing housework?
However, after listening to Wei Shusheng's statement, he deeply believed it.
Wei Shusheng proposed: Enhancing children's sense of responsibility is the top priority of education. A child who can do housework is a child who can love his parents with practical actions. To cultivate children to do housework from an early age is to cultivate a sense of responsibility, love for parents, love for society, and love for the country from an early age.
To this end, Wei Shusheng introduced his own method of educating his son, that is, to be a father who "manages small things". He taught his son from an early age that he had to do what he could do, and his son learned to wash things from a very young age, and when he was three or four years old, he asked his children to wash his feet.
The child did not understand at first, and asked in a milky voice: "Daddy, you can't wash your feet?" ”
Wei Shusheng encouraged his son: "Daddy, where do you wash well?" How good your little hands are kneading, there is a set! ”
These words coaxed the child to fart upside down, especially love to wash his father's feet.
Thanks to the housework training done by the child from an early age, the son will especially feel sorry for the father from an early age. Once, Wei Shusheng went out with his son and prepared 3 bags. He had wanted to take a backpack, but his son said no. As a result, the son carried one on his back, one in his left hand and one in his right hand. Wei Shusheng looked at his son's back, admired his son's maturity, and tasted the fruits of his education.
Wei Shusheng said that to cultivate the habit of doing housework, it is necessary to introduce the child to the right path when he is not very sensible. Therefore, when the child grows up, it becomes a matter of course to think of the parents.
The benefits of raising children to do housework from an early age are far more than that. In the process of doing housework, children gradually cultivate a sense of responsibility for home, parents, and even themselves. Therefore, Wei Shusheng's son went to high school, read liberal arts or science, and did not ask his father a word; after graduating from high school, what school and what major he took, he did not ask his father a word; after graduating from graduate school and participating in what work, his son still did not ask his father a word.
Wei Shusheng laughed and said that if the child did not ask himself, it showed that he had the ability to decide things on his own. He appealed to parents not to underestimate the matter of doing housework, if the child knows how to do housework every day, it will hurt the parents; the child will bear all kinds of trivial things in life, and will cultivate family responsibilities; such a child, wanting him to learn without effort, is an impossible thing.
The Chinese Academy of Educational Sciences has done a similar survey, and the results show that children who love to do housework are 27 times better than children who do not love housework.
Education is never limited to textbook knowledge, and the independence, self-confidence and self-improvement that children learn in housework are their life's wealth.
[3] It is not difficult for children to learn to clean up
Teaching children to live independently is the responsibility and obligation of parents, how to guide children to learn to do housework, three suggestions to parents.
1) Let the child taste the "affordable"
Children don't like to clean up because they haven't tasted the "benefits" they get from tidying up. Going against the grain and letting the child taste the "benefits" of cleaning up the housework can effectively enhance the child's awareness of cleaning up.
When my son was a child, he especially liked to fight Lego, but he didn't like to clean up. Once, just as he was about to finish, he couldn't find an important part. The son rummaged through the boxes and cabinets still fruitlessly, and even cried urgently.
As a result, just as he was sleeping in the bed at night, his son bumped into a piece of hardware and touched it to find that it was the Lego part he had been looking for for a long time. For this, he happily jumped three feet high. After such lessons, he gradually learned the habit of playing with toys to clean up.
2) Parents hold back, don't meddle!
Many children will not clean up because they have been cared for by their parents for a long time. Don't have to do it yourself, there is always someone to help clean up, and over time, the child will develop the habit of not loving to clean up.
Parents can't help but intervene, and children will gradually learn to do it. Once there is a cleaning, there will be a second and a third time, and the child will gradually become a habit in the hands.
3) Parents set a good example
The role model of parents can make children feel affected by what they hear. A parent who does not love to clean up, their children are also difficult to develop the habit of loving to clean up, so parents must lead by example and set a good example for their children.
Parents love their children for far-reaching, compared with the learning of knowledge, life ability can make children more independent to go further. Let go of your hands and let your child embrace their own life, starting with doing housework.
I am a Nuo mom, focusing on parent-child growth research, talking about parenting dry goods, writing parenting tips, paying attention to me, growing up together and improving ah~