Children are the most precious treasures of every parent, they show their love for their children, inject emotions and expectations, and are eager to give all their beauty to this child, but with more and more people in contact with the baby, many parents will have a feeling of "falling out of favor" in front of the baby, and will be "jealous" because the baby is closer to the mother or father.
In fact, the dependence relationship between the baby and the parents needs to be established through the efforts of the parents, and for the mother, it may be simpler, because the attachment relationship between the mother and the baby is generated when the mother is pregnant.
From the moment she learned she was pregnant, both physically and psychologically stimulated her motherhood. When the child is born, the mother will naturally inject her love for the fetus during pregnancy into the child who has left her body.
For the father, it may be more complicated, because the conception of the fetus is borne by the mother, and the father's feelings about the existence of the child are indirect feelings rather than direct feelings. The same is true after the birth of the child, because the mother has the ability to breastfeed, so the fathers often have a feeling of no way to start, do not know what needs to be done for the baby to make the baby feel the love of the father.
But both father and mother need to put in the effort to build a strong attachment relationship with their baby.
How do you build an attachment relationship with your baby? These 3 periods before the age of 2 are critical
1. Lactation
When the child is breastfeeding, the brain development is not complete, and there is no ability to speak, and many novice parents do not know what the baby's needs are.
In this period, the baby's understanding of the world mainly relies on touch and taste, where the mother has a natural advantage and occupies the field of taste alone, and if the father wants to establish contact with the baby, he needs to start from the touch.
Hold the baby more, touch the baby more, especially the hands, stomach, cheeks, which feel more sensitive parts, you can also gently pat the baby's back, let the baby know that you exist.
2. Discourse period
When your baby is past breastfeeding, it quickly enters the feeding period. During this period, the baby cannot yet perfectly master the skill of speaking at the beginning, and relies on repeated repetition of words or overlapping words to express his needs.
This is also a period of rapid establishment of a good relationship with the baby, fully understand the needs of the baby, in the case of the child using incomplete sentences can still grasp the child's expression of the key points, so as to give the child a parents know him very well, to him very attentive feeling
Encourage the baby more, when the child finds that the parents are not alone in the world, it is easy to take various behaviors to stay with the parents, especially during the discourse period, the child has the ability to control for the first time to attract the attention of the parents, and will continue to "harass" the parents through language.
In the face of the baby's constant harassment, parents first of all can not show bored emotions, do not have to deal with a perfunctory attitude, you can first encourage and praise the baby, and then patiently explain. Even if the baby makes a mistake, he must first affirm the baby's courage to admit his mistake before having a conversation afterwards.
Babies who grow up under encouragement will not have the phenomenon of "surprise and surprise", and when they make mistakes, they will take the initiative to take responsibility instead of trying to cover up. And they have more trust in their parents and talk to their parents, because they know very well that their parents will not blindly criticize, but will really help them solve the problem, which is also a great help for parents to get along with the rebellious process of puberty after the child.
3. Free expression period
Once babies are able to use sentences almost completely, the previously unexpressed desire to share will have an explosive tendency to share with their parents the big and small things that happen throughout the day.
Parents must look directly into the baby's eyes from time to time when listening to the baby's story, let him know that you have been listening carefully, and after the baby has finished speaking, you can appropriately comment and express envy, so that the child has a sense of accomplishment.
At the same time, you can also share the interesting little things that happened during the day with the baby, so that in the baby's heart, you will exchange secret good friends with your parents, and the relationship will be closer.
Children are very sensitive because the environment in the mother's body is very closed and quiet, just as patients undergoing closed therapy will become sensitive to the senses after the end of treatment, and children will be in this sensitive period until the age of two. They are able to notice very accurately from their parents' words or actions perfunctory and boredom that they may not even notice.
This is why many parents feel that they have not caused any harm to their children, but the children are not close to them. So if you want to establish an intimate attachment relationship with your child, before the age of two is a critical period, use sincerity to impress the baby, don't feel that they don't understand anything and pass by, this is the right way.