01
The hearts of the people are like a ruler, and the ruler is calm and righteous.
People interact with each other, eat and drink in the mouth, the appearance is in the eyes, and the character is in the heart.
True friendship is to exchange hearts for hearts, to compare hearts to hearts, and if this is not the case, it is better not to.
However, in life, we will inevitably meet people with very bad hearts and eyes, who laugh and talk to you, but they have been blocking you, making you very uncomfortable, and they do not know how to refute.
In fact, if you laugh too much, it becomes a joke, that is, "the knife is hidden in the laughter", which needs to be guarded against.
Generally speaking, in society, people with bad hearts and eyes like to make the following jokes.
02
First, provoke the feelings of husband and wife: create the trouble of "jealousy".
There is a story in the "Yu Shi Mingyan": During the Song Dynasty, in the Zaoshu Alley of Kaifeng Province, there was a man named Huang Fusong who married his wife Yang.
A monk with a crooked mind admired Yang's beauty, so he wrote a love letter and entrusted someone to give it to Yang.
Before Yang shi could open the envelope, Huang Fusong snatched it up, took a look at it, and immediately became angry and interrogated Yang Shi.
Huang Fusong believed that he was on an errand in the official palace and often went out to run errands. Maybe when he wasn't at home, Yang didn't keep his duty and invited people from all over the place to come to the house for a drink or go out on a date.
"The public is justified, and the mother-in-law is justified", the husband and wife can not argue, and the contradictions have become more and more intense. Emperor Fusong was angry and gave his wife a letter of resignation, and the fate of the husband and wife ended inexplicably.
Tu Lei, a love mentor, said: "Jealousy is because I still like it, angry because I still care, quarrel because I am very serious, and sad because I am about to lose." ”
Any couple or couple, whose love is pure, cannot accept a grain of sand, and cannot have extra people appear. If it appears, it means that the vinegar jar has been overturned and trouble ensues.
Even couples who are convinced of it will be annoyed because they often hear rumors, and the effect of "three people becoming a tiger" is also applicable to them.
Talk about the feelings of husband and wife, do not say too much, and according to the emotional characteristics of the husband and wife, to decide whether to say it. Some people are suspicious by nature, and once outsiders say the wrong thing, they will bring unnecessary trouble.
As a person who understands, we must understand that the person who provokes the feelings of husband and wife is not at ease, and it is right to stay away from him, and do not "ask anything".
03
Second, make fun of your child: make ugly "hints."
The "suggestive effect" tells us that if you tell a lie in front of your child, your child will take it seriously; if you instigate your child to do something, they will really do it.
The "butterfly effect," on the other hand, tells us that a butterfly flares up its wings, bringing about a flow of air, and over time, a tornado. That is to say, what the child did when he was a child, and then continued to do it, will lead to his life, going in this direction.
It is not difficult to find that the child's cognition is limited, and his future is inseparable from the guidance of adults.
If you make fun of your child at will, you will change your child's three views. Wrong jokes can ruin a child's three views and are difficult to correct.
Let's say an adult gives a dime to a child and lets the child steal the taillights on a bicycle. Later, the child believed that stealing could make money and went astray.
The child does not understand things, has made outrageous behavior, and the adults are very happy. But happiness is based on "ugly", which is very shameful.
04
Third, tease strangers: watch others get ugly, and then rejoice.
The Ming Dynasty writer Feng Menglong wrote a story of "Yueming Monk Du Liucui".
During the Southern Song Dynasty, Yin Liu, the governor of Lin'an Province, preached and convened a gathering of local celebrities, but Yutong, the abbot of the Shuiyue Temple, did not come. He harbored a grudge and asked Wu Honglian, a woman in the Qinglou Building, to look for Yutong and get evidence of breaking the ring.
There is a way that people's hearts are untainted, and where there is dust.
Originally, the two people who could not hit each other with eight rods were hated because of Liu Xuanjiao's behavior.
Between strangers, well water does not violate river water. However, some people want to obstruct it, hoping that the other party will be ugly.
For example, on the street, strangers come to ask for directions, and local people randomly point the way, letting strangers take a long detour and circle around.
When we meet an acquaintance, we can deliberately point out the wrong path and test his ability to discern, but we cannot do this to strangers, but to help sincerely.
In life, we inevitably have to deal with strangers. There is a way that one is born, the other is ripe. If you are reunited, you are very embarrassed with each other, and you really don't have to "tease" people.
05
Fourth, which pot does not open which pot: find the pain of others and use it as a joke.
In the entertainment program "Ace to Ace", Liu Jialing told Cecilia Cheung that she had a husband who played the emperor, and the husband and wife were very affectionate.
At the time, Cecilia Cheung was in a state of divorce. If you fight husband, she will definitely be sad. Therefore, Cecilia Cheung replied that she had two sons.
Liu Jialing has a husband, but no children, Cecilia Cheung has children, but her husband has left. They pinch each other's weaknesses by showing their strengths.
In the plot, there can be jokes about each other, but in life, we can't do that.
Looking at people's strengths and not revealing people's shortcomings is the minimum standard of conduct. Everyone has scars, and if you want to expose them, they are as hateful as pouring salt on them.
For example, when you meet a divorced person, talk less about the topic of marriage; when you meet someone whose parents have just passed away, don't talk about filial piety; when you meet someone with leg problems, don't talk about running.
At any time, we must avoid the shortcomings of others, let alone joke. Behind your smile are the tears of the other party, what is the meaning?
06
There is a ruler in speech, and there is a degree of ridicule.
Many times, you can't find a topic, just go silent and sit quietly for a while.
If you have to say something, think about it and then speak. To make jokes, you must grasp the scale, do not talk about it.
With people, the most frightening thing is that you joke, but he is serious; he jokes, but you are broken.
If you are friendly, then jokes will also have tenderness, and lies are also beautiful.
Really not, because a joke offends a person.
A person's heart is very bad, others know, don't be clever.
Author: Cloth coarse food.
Follow my words and go into your heart.
The illustrations in this article come from the Internet.