Since the two-child policy was fully opened, many parents have put the two-child plan on the agenda. However, the second child is not to say that it is born, and we must also consider more about the big treasure in the family.
Under normal circumstances, if Dabao is older, it is not recommended that Bao's mother fight for the second child, so as not to suffer from herself and her children in the future.
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"When I came home from the winter vacation of my junior year, I found that I had an extra brother."
Lily's parents are in their 40s, and the couple has always wanted to have another son and make up a "good" word with their daughter.
Just when Lily was about to go to college abroad, the second child was fully open, and the couple immediately wanted to catch up with this "hitchhiker", but they were worried that their daughter had ideas in mind, so they found a time to explore their daughter's tone, and the feedback they got was naturally not good.
In Lily's view, the parents' current health is not as good as that of the young people, and the burden of having another child is not heavier, and they are all in college, and they have a brother or sister, which is a little difficult to accept psychologically.
The parents did not mention this matter again, and Lily thought that they had given up the idea of having a second child. During the winter vacation of her junior year, she thought that she had not returned for more than a year, so she quickly bought a plane ticket home to see her parents.
As a result, her parents gave her a huge "surprise" and she had a younger brother who was not yet a full moon. Lily was very angry, and she asked her parents why they were hiding from themselves, if they had not come home this time to find out, they did not know when they would be hidden.
"Isn't it just an accident, the last time we discussed with you, your face didn't look very good, and your father and I didn't dare to tell you... And you are alone in a foreign country, and you are worried about your blind thoughts! Mom said with some emptiness.
At this point, the younger brother was born, Lily naturally not very good at saying anything, but looking at the mother because of the child, the appearance of the old man, she is not very tasteful, with the big self has made the parents suffer a lot, and now there is another brother, how many years to survive!
Around us, there are many second-child age differences like Lily's family, especially after the opening of the second child, many middle-aged parents are eager to try, hoping to seize this opportunity.
However, from the perspective of eugenics and family harmony, the second child cannot be born at any time.
The age difference between the second child is too large, and it is not recommended that the mother fight for the second child
Expert advice: If Dabao is more than 15 years old, it is not recommended that Bao's mother fight for a second child.
First of all, the average woman is around the age of 25 to give birth, and so dabao is over 15 years old, the mother has passed the age of 40, this is already the category of advanced maternal age, although the development of medical technology, but there are still many risks of pregnancy and childbirth at an advanced age.
For example, the risk of pregnancy problems and the risk of poor fetal development after childbirth increases. The study found that if two births are separated by more than ten years, the maximum risk value may be 2 times the lowest value.
Secondly, when Dabao is more than 15 years old, the age difference with the second eldest is actually relatively large, and the interests and hobbies and schedules of the two are too different, and they do not have a common language with each other, and it is often difficult to get close.
Finally, there is also a practical question: if the age difference is too large, who is responsible for the parenting after the second year.
Especially after ten years, when the second eldest grows up, his parents face a "retirement wave" and his earning ability is limited, and the burden of parenting may fall on Dabao's head.
If the relationship between family members is harmonious, the eldest is willing to raise a younger brother (sister) is fine, if not, in the future, most of them are prone to family conflicts, and parents and children will suffer.
In summary, the age difference between the second child is best not too large, but if the age difference is too close, there are also hidden dangers.
Dabao is at this age, and it is more appropriate to have a second child
Some parents want to have a second child, maybe they want to let Dabao have a companion, and the family will be lively. However, did you know that the age difference between the second child is also exquisite!
Under normal circumstances, when the age difference between the second child is 4 to 6 years old, it is relatively happy, that is to say, when Dabao is in the age group of 3 to 5 years old, the mother will prepare for the second child, which is often just right, and the parents and children will suffer less. Here's why:
1, from the perspective of eugenics, the mother gave birth to the first child, the uterine environment and endocrine function are somewhat damaged, it takes time to recover, if you can slow down for a few years, the physical condition is better, and then give birth to a second child, the baby's health is better.
The world's authoritative medical journal "New England Journal" once found that the time of pregnancy of the second child is one and a half years to two years after the first child, the risk value of the birth of the second child is the lowest.
2. From the perspective of postpartum recovery, after the mother gives birth to the first child, there are quite large fluctuations in psychology and physiology, especially in the first three years of raising the eldest, which requires a lot of energy and time. At this time, if you fight for the second child, it is more unfavorable to the recovery of the body and psychology.
3, from the perspective of Dabao, the child within 3 years old, is the key period to establish an intimate relationship with the parents, in this stage, her dependence psychology is more serious, need enough love from the parents, if at this time another person "competes" for the love of the parents, they will have obvious "hostility".
【Today's topic】How many years do you think it is more appropriate for children to be separated?