As George Herbert put it, "A good mother is worth a hundred teachers." ”
Indeed, a mother who is wise enough does have the potential to change a child's life.
Trevor Noah, the popular American talk show host, is such a lucky child.
Because he was born in South Africa, where apartheid was severe, his original hopeless life was completely changed by his mother.
In his memoir, Born Guilty, Trevor tells how her mother used her vision and wisdom to change and shape her life.
First, the world is not only as big as slums
In Born Guilty, author Trevor recalls that when he was a child, his mother always took him to the ice rink, the drive-in theater, the picnics, and other activity areas that white people went to.
Others said that under that system of apartheid, he could not leave the slums for the rest of his life anyway, and what could he do to take him to those places.
But his mother said that even if he could not live without the slums all his life, I would let him know that the slums are not the whole world.
It was because of his mother's vision and unusual education that Fred was later able to leave South Africa and come to the United States, and broke out of his own world.
As the saying goes, "Even if you are in the gutter, look up at the stars." ”
Yes, the meaning of looking up at the starry sky is that it can give us strength, and it can also make us see higher and farther than others, and we can go further.
Second, don't always grieve over the past
Trevor's mother used to tell him a phrase: "Don't grieve for the past." ”
This mother is really wise, because grieving for the past has no positive significance except to make us more sad and negative.
As Tagore's poem says, "When you weep about missing the sun, then you also miss the stars." ”
When we grieve over what has already happened, we just indulge in grief and may miss out on more.
I remembered a case I had seen before.
A foreign mother lost her child in a car accident, and this mother was sad and thought that her child was in a car accident because the driver drunk.
So she put away her grief and spontaneously organized an "anti-drunk driving" public welfare organization, hoping to help more people avoid losing their lives in drunk driving.
Today, the organization is getting bigger because it, every year, saves thousands of people from being killed in a car accident caused by drunk driving.
So you see, this mother, through this sad thing she encountered, made herself stronger, better than before, and thus made the lives of tens of thousands of people better.
Pain makes you strong
Trevor's mother told him the third sentence: "Pain makes you stronger." ”
No one's life can be smooth sailing, and no one can live a life without suffering.
The difference between those who are powerful and ordinary people is that they have different attitudes in the face of pain.
Those who are positive, powerful, in the face of pain, will find positive meaning in it, rise from it, and eventually let pain become a greater force to move forward.
Those who are negative, weak, will be immersed in pain and unable to extricate themselves, and eventually stumble through the years and achieve nothing.
As Charlie Munger said, "People should not sink in self-pity, but should use each blow to improve themselves." ”
Sima Qian, a famous thinker and historian in history, was originally a red man in front of Emperor Wudi of Han, and he followed Emperor Wudi of Han on tour three times.
Later, once, because of the intercession of Li Ling, who was captured for the defeat of the soldiers, emperor Wu of Han was enraged, and he was sent to prison and sentenced to palace punishment.
At that time, Sima Qian's "Records of History" had already been written in half.
However, in the face of such inhuman torture, Sima Qian even had the courage to live faster, let alone write books.
But in the end, Sima Qian overcame the physical and psychological pain and completed this huge work of tens of thousands of words.
Because some people are able to become stronger and more indestructible under the blow of pain.
Sima Qian is such a person.
At present, the "History of History" has long become the greatest historical work in Chinese history, ranking first among the twenty-four histories, illuminating the thousands of years. Sima Qian himself also became the object of worship by many historians in later generations.
If Sima Qian had stopped creating the "Shi Ji" because of such pain and blows, then no one in later generations would have known who Sima Qian was, and there would not have been a great work in the world.
Therefore, pain and blows, if dealt with a positive attitude, not only will not weaken us, but can help us become stronger, let us surpass ourselves, and make greater achievements.
As the popular saying goes on the Internet: Those who can't defeat us will eventually make us stronger.
Write at the end
Gorky said: "Loving children is something that hens do, but to be good at educating them, this is a big thing for the country, which requires talent and profound knowledge of life!" ”
For parents, the best way to educate their children is to improve themselves.
Only by making yourself good enough and wise enough can you give your children a better education.