For children, we must do "three not accustomed to two disregards"
In this way, the child will have a future appearance
Educating a child is not an easy task
It is not a good practice to regulate too tightly or too loosely
As a parent, we must keep in mind the principle of "three unaccustomed and two disregarded", so that children can grow up healthily
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Some people say that parenthood is the easiest thing in the world
But being a qualified parent is even more difficult
There are always some parents who like to pick and choose their children, but forget that the real problem may be in ourselves
Most parents inevitably "picked sesame seeds and lost watermelon"
Stuck in small things, but confused on big problems
The result is that the child grows longer and more crooked
Teacher Li Meijin, a famous educator, once said: "Parents should not always manage the hard management, and ignore the management"
Parents keep in mind that "three is not used to two cares", and the child will have a future appearance
01
The child doesn't know how to be polite, leave him alone
Only those who know how to respect others can gain the respect of others
When the child is always angry, he will swear and talk a lot, and he will confront the teacher everywhere
He always shouts at his elders, and his younger siblings are domineering and selfish compared to his own younger siblings
There are guests in the house who do not know how to say hello at all, and there is no big or small talk
At this time, as a parent, we must correct him in a timely manner and strictly discipline him not to resign ourselves to him
Once a child forms this habit and lacks respect for people, it will be difficult for him to get the respect of others in society in the future
How to guide children to learn to respect others? An educator summed up a three-word mantra
These three words are: qing, show, and sample. That is, clear language, correct demonstration, and the power of example
This requires parents to learn how to teach their children how to call others
Behavior should be a good example for children, exert the power of example, and use their every move to influence children
A polite person in life will often win the favor of many people
Conversely, if a person behaves rudely, he does not know how to respect others at all
So there is a high probability that people around him will be full of disgust for him
The child does not understand politeness, which can easily affect his communication, which in turn affects the child's mental health
It even affects his future and future
The famous philosopher Carlisle once said: Politeness is more powerful than law
Remember, courtesy is a person's best calling card
02
The child is good to eat and lazy to do, regardless of him
The more independent the child, the more he will have a future
And those children who grew up surrounded by their parents and were spoiled by their parents
Often, due to a lack of self-care, nothing is achieved
A person who eats well and is lazy will not only not take care of himself, but also drag others down
If you don't know how to cultivate your child's independence, one day, you will regret it
I once watched an interesting video about an international student named Ian at a party with friends
He was asked to complete a specialty from his hometown, just to be on the safe side
He chose very simple scrambled eggs with tomatoes
However, when he got started, he found that this seemingly simple recipe was not simple
He didn't know whether to scramble eggs or tomatoes first
In a hurry, he had to temporarily hold his feet and dial the phone of his parents who were far away in China for help
To help their son, his parents got up from the bed before five o'clock
The mother herself got started, explaining while stir-frying, and the father carefully recorded the whole process on the side
In the end, Ian finally finished his own scrambled eggs with tomatoes under the guidance of his parents
The video, titled "The World Is No Bigger Than a Bowl of Scrambled Eggs with Tomatoes," resonated with thousands of netizens
Countless people sighed:
"Only parents are good in the world"
"I miss Mom and Dad so much"
"Really crying"
But they overlooked the fact that it was
A boy in his twenties who can't even make the simplest scrambled eggs with tomatoes
When there is a problem, they will only blindly look for their parents
Isn't such a child a "giant baby"?
The so-called pipe is like sand
As a parent, we must learn to cultivate their children's independence from an early age
Good eat lazy children, don't get used to him
03
The child is unreasonable, leave him alone
You often see such a picture
In the mall, in the play area, some children are lying on the ground desperately
Either crying or making trouble, the parents are asked to meet his requirements
Many times, parents will give in to face, and as a result, the next time, the child will still die in the face
The more indulgent the parents are, the more selfish and domineering the child is
Over time, it will become a "bear child" that everyone hates
As parents, remember to adhere to their own principles when their children are unreasonable
Don't get used to your child, only then will your child understand what can be done
What is not, instead of blindly following your own temper
When the child is young, if you don't know how to discipline
Then when he grows up and you want to discipline, it is often too late
The reason why Sun Xing in "Sweeping the Black Storm" has come to the end of the road step by step
It was because his parents connived and ignored him
You know, it's hard to teach a child well, but it's easy to raise a child
04
When the child can face difficulties on his own, leave it alone
As the saying goes, life is not as good as it should be
No one's life is completely smooth, on the road of life, we will always encounter such setbacks and difficulties
As Hemingway said, "Difficulties are not terrible, terrible are hit by difficulties"
A person's ability to deal with difficulties often determines his later life
As a parent, you must understand that one day, your child will need to face everything independently
This requires us to cultivate children's ability to bear difficulties independently from an early age
Only by letting him stand up on his own again and again in setbacks, and encountering big problems in the future, can he face and solve them on his own
Instead of blowing the wind lightly, it fell down.
Professor Li Meijin once shared such a case in her lecture
A child who was arrogant by his parents from childhood, when he was twelve, just because his mother criticized him a few times, turned around and chose to jump off a building to commit suicide
And the reason why he is like this is entirely because his psychological endurance is too weak
Psychological studies in children have shown that:
The more well-protected the child, the more vulnerable he is, and the more likely he is to give up on himself in the face of setbacks, or even to extremes
And those children who are accustomed to dealing with problems and taking on difficulties from a young age are much stronger, have a much higher ability to regulate emotions, and face setbacks, they are easier to come out
As a parent, remember to be able to bear difficulties when your child is able to bear it
Don't easily step in and let him become an optimistic and strong child in exercise, more important than anything else
05
When your child is able to do things independently, leave it alone
Many parents like to nag their children, and the more small things, the more they like to nag endlessly
Eating, dressing, and sleeping
There are even some mothers, whose sons are already adults, and they have to take care of him to bathe
I'm afraid he won't be able to wash it clean, I'm afraid he'll catch a cold
As a result, children become more and more lazy
Yi Lai stretched out his hands and opened his mouth, not only wanted to rely on his parents all the time, but also did not know how to be grateful at all
The more the parents refuse to let go, the less the child grows
Frank Clark once said this:
"The most important lesson that parents can teach their children is how to survive independently without their parents."
Don't underestimate the child, he is much more capable than you think
Educating children is undoubtedly a university question, and when in charge, parents must give their children guidance and help in a timely manner
When it should not be managed, parents should also learn to let go at the right time
Good parents must keep in mind this principle of "three unaccustomed and two disregarded"
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