Bao Ma Xi xi came back from work, the moment she opened the door, she felt that something was wrong at home, changed her slippers and went to the bedroom, her good mood was instantly disrupted by the broken cosmetics on the ground, her favorite lipstick and foundation liquid were not spared, and her anger had reached its peak.
She took a deep breath, turned her gaze to the baby who was kneeling on the carpet, and immediately asked the child: "Can your destructive power be stronger?" ”
In other words, she had experienced this experience more than once, and Sissi felt that if she did not teach the bear child a lesson, she would definitely make more mistakes in the future. Just as she was about to do it, her husband, who had just arrived home, quickly stopped her, and the husband said, "How do you think that the baby did it?" What about the evidence? ”。
Sisi was overwhelmed by his words, self-proclaimed hot mothers of the new era, not the kind of people who indiscriminately punish children.
The anger that had just rushed to the top gradually stopped, and after calming down, he came to the baby and asked his little baby in a pleasant and gentle voice: "Cub, who broke my mother's cosmetics?" Tell your mom that there is a reward. The baby lowered her head and said to her fingers, "It's Dabai, when I was playing hide-and-seek with it, it accidentally broke!" ”
After watching "Martha and the Bear", it brought a warning of parent-child education
After sorting out the causes and consequences, Sisy punished Alaska White, and also told the little baby not to go to the bedroom after playing hide-and-seek, although Sissi was very distressed about those cosmetics, but more than that, he had palpitations, fortunately, his husband stopped himself, otherwise he would definitely hurt the baby's heart.
This reminds Sissi of the cartoon called "Martha and the Bear" that he watched with the baby last time, and in the episode of "Strange Footprints", there is a similar parent-child education warning: Don't underestimate your child's ability to perceive.
The general plot of this episode is about the little protagonist Martha insisting that the footprints left behind are the rabbit's, but everyone does not believe it, but fortunately, it turns out that little Martha is right.
For most of life, parents are always susceptible to phenomena seen by the eyes. They think they have tasted more salt than their children have eaten, so they are blindly confident when they are older, but they ignore a lot of information outside of vision.
Like distance, like smell, like intuition, and so on. Don't underestimate children, their perception is very strong.
And there is often a more detailed ability to observe things, so parents encounter things when accompanying their children to grow up, do not arbitrarily draw conclusions from the perspective and point of view of adults.
In short, we must uphold an objective and neutral attitude, not an absolutist statement. This point should also be educated to children, which is conducive to cultivating and perfecting their personality development, please trust the child's perceptual ability, so as to help the child grow up smoothly.
So, in what things are parents prone to misunderstand their children?
Parents always think they know their children very well, but in fact, as their children grow up, they have their own little secrets. There is not only one side to the growth of personality. So parents must not be self-righteous, and do not misunderstand them with assumptions.
Misunderstand children in their learning
The friend's son is in junior high school, with a serious phenomenon of partial subjects, the friend feels that the son is in love early and has two hearts and two uses, resulting in a decline in academic performance.
In the middle school of adolescence, there is a strange paranoia, unwilling to explain, unwilling to reveal their inner thoughts, no matter how the parents scold and misunderstand, he does not explain, until the child's grandfather can not see it, do not want the relationship between friends and sons to become more and more rigid.
So I personally went out on the horse and chatted with my grandson for several hours, which made it clear why.
It turned out that the pressure of the key class was high, and it was facing the critical period of junior high school, and the child was unstable, and he fell into a pimple without a good exam. It is difficult for young children to control their thoughts, and it is easy to enter a dead end if they are not careful, coupled with the subjects that have not been tested well, and the endless cycle of more and more inability to learn, resulting in a sharp decline in grades, thus refusing to communicate with their parents.
As a parent's position, without understanding the facts, do not hurt the child's heart. Therefore, in the face of children's learning and achievements, it is advisable to give encouragement and affirmation.
In addition, parent-child communication is very important, and misunderstandings that may rub into each other should be avoided as much as possible.
Misunderstand children when it comes to spending money
The girlfriend takes the child to the supermarket after work, and after buying the things on the list, she is preparing to check out and go home, but the child does not know where to take out a bag of snacks, and refuses to put it down.
The girlfriend felt that the child's eating too many snacks would hurt her teeth, and she did not agree to buy it, but under the child's various tricks and rolling on the ground, she finally chose to compromise.
Like a similar experience, I believe that many parents have encountered, in the face of their children's cuteness, always comfort their children are still young, do not understand things, and when he grows up, he will naturally be able to understand the truth.
But this is not the case, because the desire of the child will become more and more inflated as the parents give in and compromise again and again.
Maybe parents will feel that they don't think too seriously about things, buying snacks and toys is just what all children like, and it doesn't have to be too harsh.
But you don't realize that what if a child's desires are too great to satisfy? Children who are accustomed to taking what they can get will also do whatever it takes to achieve their goals. Ordinary people have limited wealth, while the desires in people's hearts are infinite, and where can limited wealth satisfy unlimited desires. Therefore, parents should warn their children when they are still young that they should not be greedy and learn to be satisfied.
Another reason why kids are passionate about play
Sixty percent of boys are passionate about playing games and have a natural fondness for games, so they spend a lot of time on it. However, parents are most unaccustomed to their children playing games, afraid that they will indulge in online games, and from then on, they will delay their studies and become a waste of firewood.
In fact, parents may wish to change their concepts and regard games as just a kind of adjustment in their children's lives. Just like hobbies such as watching movies, traveling, singing, etc., it can be used to relax in leisure time. Just arrange the time for the game, as long as the children are at ease with school.
So, don't easily label your child.
In this era, whether it is an artist in the entertainment industry or an ordinary person in life, he always wears a mask and walks in the world. The so-called "human design" is forced to be helpless, because the people around them will label each other.
It's a strange circle, and each of us involuntarily walks into this strange circle. Once, my mother made a braised pork dish. Because the oil was too much, I didn't eat a bite while losing weight.
A month later, we went to my grandmother's house as a guest, and my grandfather was also preparing to make braised pork for me to eat, but my mother stopped us. The mother said, "Don't bother, she thinks the braised meat is too greasy." Because of a simple sentence, braised pork has never appeared in the family since.
The power of language is no less than that of words, especially when parents label children with some kind of negative label of "no", those children who have not yet formed the ability to think independently will be particularly easy to accept, and it is likely that they will find a sense of belonging according to the labels posted by their parents, which is very incorrect.
If you are in a bad mood and are not willing to greet a stranger introduced by your mother, then the mother will explain to someone that "this child is shy and does not like to talk to people", so the child is likely to be shy for life. I hope that parents will understand that every child who is labeled by his parents is an elephant tied by a string.
As a parent, you have to figure out the nature of your own children
Some people have said that children are a blank piece of paper that parents need to use their hearts and brains to describe. But a professor of preschool education disagreed and strongly disagreed.
The professor believes that we have no right to treat children as a blank piece of paper that adults need to describe, and we cannot control children's lives at will because they are given by their parents.
When the fetus is detached from the mother, it is an independent person. Children are born equal, and children should also receive the most basic respect of their parents.
Respect for children requires parents to observe and think about the meaning behind their actions from a more equal perspective. As a parent, you have to figure out the needs of your own children.
So, how can you really understand the psychology of your child?
How to truly understand the psychology of children, in fact, as long as you can see it from the bits and pieces of life. Parents have plenty of time to spend with their children before they go to secondary school.
As long as you have the heart, you can use patience to know the child's character and preferences, and it is recommended that you get the child's real psychological behavior in the following points.
No matter what you do, there will be a motive. Man's fundamental motives are roughly equal to his needs, after all, how can a man live a life without desire or desire? Most lay people living in the world crave love, which includes acceptance, praise, respect, understanding, affirmation, and so on.
Therefore, there is a certain fundamental purpose behind the child's wrong behavior. It may be driven by interests, physiological needs, or emotional needs. From this point of view, there is no need to be too harsh on the child.
If a child lives in a large family full of food and clothing, then their hearts will be very calm and full, and they will not cause any big trouble.
As mentioned earlier, parents should not always treat their children from a high and high perspective, hoping to give their children full respect, accompany their children, be a parent who makes their children respected, and do not lose their temper. Over time, children will be very resistant to communicating with their parents.
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