Hello everyone, I'm Cuckoo Mama~
I saw an 11-year-old boy on the Internet who, as soon as the alarm rang in the morning, immediately got up to wash, fold the quilt, and clean up the room. Then cook your own food and wash your own dishes after eating.
After a set of procedures, the boy packed up his school bag and went to school. This self-consciousness simply made the old mother feel so relieved that she did not want it.
Reminiscent of the article issued by the Ministry of Education, it said that primary and secondary school students should learn to cook rice and stew soup, repair home appliances, and grow vegetables and raise poultry. This is probably to let parents cultivate self-disciplined and independent children.
George Bernard Shaw once said, "Self-control is the strongest instinct." ”
A child with strong self-control and high self-discipline does not need the spur and supervision of the outside world to do anything in the future, and he can consciously do things well and become a strong person.
Such a child, in the future, is excellent that you can't imagine.
Many parents will ask, how to judge whether a child's self-discipline is strong or not? We can observe from life to see if the child has the following signs.
One: The child has 3 signs that indicate that he is a highly disciplined person
If the child can usually do the following points, it means that his self-discipline ability is leveraged, and parents can steal the music.
Stick to a good routine
When it comes to self-discipline, the person I admire the most is Haruki Murakami.
He gets up at 4 a.m. every morning, writes for 4 hours, and runs 10 kilometers. This kind of work and rest allows him to always be in a full mental state, which is also a large part of the reason for his remarkable achievements.
Although we don't require the kids to get up at 4 a.m. and run 10 km. But if the child can insist on going to bed early and getting up early, and has a good routine of work and rest, then he is also a self-disciplined baby.
Because of a good routine, it is easy to stick to it for a day or two, but it is difficult to maintain a good habit for a long time.
Everyone is inert, and when there are various reasons that make people sway between laziness and persistence, if the child can still choose to insist, do not open a gap in inertia.
This choice preference will slowly become a habit of the child, making him a highly disciplined person.
Make plans and goals
In psychology, there is a word called "recently developed zone".
It refers to the fact that there will be an area of potential in the child's existing abilities, and this area is the "recent development zone".
For example, a child jumps rope, he can jump 100, but his potential can jump 150. Just between 100 and 150 this process, too tiring. The child thinks, forget it, or give up, jump 100 on the line.
But if the child can make a plan, saying that it will take a month to reach the amount of 150 jump ropes per day.
So how?
He thought, jump 2 more a day, slowly add up, the goal can be achieved, not tired.
If the child can make plans and goals on a regular basis, he will push his potential step by step to reach the "recent development zone".
Such a child will become more and more excellent, throwing away from others by a long way.
Reduce unnecessary waste
The waste mentioned here refers to the waste of time.
Everyone's time and energy in a day is limited, and if the child wastes a lot of time on useless things, such as brushing the mobile phone, then he will definitely shorten the time on other things.
The child's childhood can be playing games.
Because in play, children can increase social connections and socialize. You can also vent your emotions in the game and heal your emotions. Games can also bring children to think and learn, so that he knows some of the basic rules and skills of getting along with people.
A child's childhood can also be a fantasy.
Fantasy can use the child's imagination to satisfy his curiosity and desire to explore.
A child's childhood can also be reading, making friends, and exercising. These are activities that are beneficial to physical and mental health and can help children grow.
If a child can focus on beneficial activities from an early age and reduce some unnecessary waste of time, he will get a huge fortune.
Two: the key to self-discipline
A mom friend mentioned her baby and said that as long as you don't pay attention, he is secretly brushing his mobile phone there. Want him to consciously read books and do homework? That's when the sun hits the west.
And as soon as the holidays came, he was like a little beast that was put back into the mountains, which was called a lazy free. Don't sleep at night, don't get up in the morning. What school bags, stationery, homework books, throw them away, and find them when you need them.
As soon as this statement came out, many parents expressed their agreement, saying that this was simply a portrayal of their own babies.
What should parents do to cultivate their children's self-discipline?
Children are highly malleable before their personalities and habits are stereotyped. If parents can guide and help their children from the following aspects, then they can also cultivate a high degree of self-discipline.
Accumulate in small steps
In the book "Cognitive Breakthrough", there is a "growth-opportunity" curve. It says that everyone has to go through a long period of accumulation before jumping to the next stage.
If you think about it carefully, we often say such things to our children.
Eat faster;
Wash quickly;
Hurry up and do your homework;
Hurry up.
We are constantly urging our children to "hurry up", but the result is that the children are getting slower and slower. That is, we pay too much attention to efficiency, so that we want our children to meet their expectations quickly, but forget that it is difficult for children to do it in one step.
If we want our children to master an ability and jump to the next stage of life, we must pay attention to gradual and small steps of accumulation.
Psychology has a "threshold effect." That is, to first put forward reasonable and acceptable lower requirements, and then gradually put forward higher requirements.
For example, do a little better this time, do a little more next time, and do a little more next time. Don't eat into a fat person in one breath, in the way of "climbing the threshold", gradually explore the potential of the child, let him slowly accumulate, and finally reach the goal.
Develop good reading habits
Don't want your child to waste time and life, then in his daily schedule, he should schedule a period of time for reading.
We cultivate children's reading habits, the sooner the better.
From an early age, you can take it with you to read picture books, and when you grow up, you can read children's books, world famous books, history, essays, etc. In books, children can see the vastness of heaven and earth, expand their cognition, experience a different world and life, and learn to think from multiple angles.
Once the child has developed the habit of reading and cultivated an interest in reading, he will not indulge in "garbage happiness" that day and let himself do beneficial things.
Good reading habits can affect a child's personality throughout life and can also help him cultivate a high degree of self-discipline.
Maintain a regular rhythm of life
Many children, as soon as the holidays come, they completely relax, and their lives are irregular, even black and white upside down.
I don't agree with this kind of routine.
The book "Why We Sleep" points out that sleep is not a "debt", and the sleep owed at night will come back after making up for more sleep during the day.
Conversely, once sleep is lost at night, your child's memory and brain may be affected in the coming week, even if you sleep more during the day.
In addition, regular sleep and rest can also reduce depressed emotions and keep children in a positive state of mind.
Getting up early and living regularly will bring positive psychological cues to the child and maintain self-confidence throughout the day. Children can also arrange their lives rhythmically, reduce tension and anxiety, and cultivate a sense of time.
Therefore, as parents, we ourselves should take the lead, maintain a regular rhythm of life, and let children develop the habit of self-discipline. Even on holidays, children are not allowed to be excessively "indulgent" and have chaotic schedules.
In this way, the child can be more free in self-discipline.
Is your child self-disciplined?
【Picture from the Internet, invasion and deletion】
About the author: Cuckoo mom, a good observation, thinking, method of the mother. Focus on children's psychology, read children's easy parenting, like to pay attention to it~