Text/End Of Little North
The intensity of contemporary young people's love can be described as shocking to me, like fast-food love, which has become the mainstream of people.
In this relationship, the relationship between the two people is established quickly, the separation is also rapid, the points are combined, and the reason for the quarrel is also inexplicable.
Sometimes, looking at the love and separation of the people around me, I can't help but think, am I old? Can't keep up with the pace of young people?
Is it that the concept of love is updated and iterated too quickly, or is people's concept of love biased?
The most critical thing is that there are now more and more people who cannot treat their feelings correctly.
Some obviously like it, but never dare to take the first step; some obviously don't like it, but they still have to watch each other pay for themselves.
Love is instinctive, but love needs to be learned.
01: People with a trial-and-error attitude have a very poor character
As a maternal solo for more than twenty years, I seem to have seen through the red dust, what love and hate, what sea oath mountain alliance, in front of the cause and bread, it is not worth mentioning at all.
In life, there are people like me who don't want to fall in love, and naturally there are people who are keen to fall in love every day.
I have zero experience in the history of feelings, and sometimes I am curious, why do I talk about so many loves, but I don't feel tired?
Xiao Jing told me: Before getting married, all the love affairs were just the cost of his trial and error.
What is the cost of trial and error?
Like it is tired of being together, and when you don't feel it, you quickly separate, looking for the next person who makes your heart move.
Anyway, in a relationship, he only needs the superficial emotional needs and echoes, in fact, there is no loss at all.
Of course, he was also collectively called "scumbag" by his ex-girlfriends.
I don't quite understand this behavior and feel that it is no different from cheating on the girl's feelings.
He laughed at me for being too pure, and the girl with pure love has the greatest chance of being cheated in her relationship.
In his opinion, the beginning and end of a relationship depends entirely on his mood, and the quality of a relationship depends on whether he is willing to make a scene.
When the mood comes, buy a lipstick to make the baby happy, the mood is not good, it is cold and violent or deliberately looking for an excuse to separate.
Because this is an era of fast-food love, few people will be sad to death because of a relationship.
Therefore, he is not responsible for these girlfriends at all.
Unless, in this relationship, he has moved his heart.
Listening to Xiao Jing's words, I couldn't help but think about whether men are so bad, or whether love has become a tool for entertainment in the eyes of modern people.
If you like it, play it, throw it away if you don't like it, anyway, there will always be a new one, as if whoever is serious will lose.
But is that correct?
The correct concept of love should be to treat each other with sincerity when facing the person who is moved. Everyone needs to have the ability to greet love and reject love.
And most importantly, learn to correct the motivation for love.
Love is not a toy to relieve boredom when bored, nor is it a decision on a whim for the sake of satisfaction.
It is to find people who make themselves happy, able to accept themselves, work together together, and be like-minded in the future.
The motivation for falling in love should be simple and pure.
02: People who play with feelings, there is no pattern
Now there are many "love brain" little girls, who are too naïve and simple to treat feelings.
The boyfriend's few words of coaxing deceived himself, and even some little girls felt that they had met true love.
Some time ago, Jiahe was like this, just took off the single, every day and we showed off that they found a boyfriend who was so good to her, plus they were handsome, Xiaojia and her boyfriend were like conjoined babies every day, tired together.
A week before Xiao Jia's boyfriend's birthday, Xiao Jia began to prepare birthday gifts, saying that she wanted to make up for the gifts that had not been given to her boyfriend in the past 25 years.
That is to say, on that birthday, Xiao Jia bought 25 different gifts for the object.
These gifts cost Xiao Jia Xiao twenty thousand, although Xiao Jia is a rich second generation, but spend so much money to prepare gifts for a birthday, as her friend, we still can't help but remind her.
Xiao Jia said that she would not be on the head, but her actual actions were very sincere.
In addition to gifts, daily expenses are basically paid by her, ranging from a few thousand to as many as twenty or thirty thousand.
At that time, we already had a vague sense that something was wrong. This is in love, it is clear that he is looking for a boyfriend who eats soft rice.
But Xiao Jia, who is indulging in sweet love, does not listen to persuasion at all.
Sure enough, after finding the next girl who was richer and more willing to spend money for him, the boy decisively abandoned Xiao Jia.
As a friend of Xiao Jia and a bystander, I can't quite understand why many people lose themselves so easily when they are in love.
In order to gradually abandon the circle of friends for the sake of the object, in order to make him happy, he can give up his original principles, and even eventually become another person.
Perhaps, this is why many people are pua in their relationships.
Take love too seriously, above everything, higher than your own studies, higher than your own family, higher than your own principles, and the final result will only be one, that is, this relationship can only end with an endless ending.
03: Love, need to go in both directions
True love must go in both directions.
One-way giving, or not paying and waiting for the other party to pay, this kind of love will not last long in the end.
Don't curl yourself up in a shell just because you've been hurt, and don't turn these wounds into thorns because you've been hurt, and hurt those who really treat you.
People who are immersed in love, do not try to change because they are afraid that the other party will one day dislike themselves, so that they can become what they imagine.
Come on!
Isn't that cool at all?
To establish a correct view of love, you need to look at the character and pattern of the other party, and one less cannot be.
If the other party's pattern is only on the pastime, you really don't need to waste time and continue to entangle with it; if the other party's character only stays on play, then you don't have to give love to someone who is not worthy.
You are brave enough to be yourself, to be the person you want to be, and the person who loves you will naturally love you.
About the Author:
Su Xiaobei is a young writer and marriage counselor. Hope to use simple words to warm your heart.