The literal understanding is that when you express a certain point of view or do something, someone directly jumps out to deny your point of view or contradict you.
In education, the term "desktop parenting" may not be familiar to parents, but this method is often found in many families.
This kind of not very correct way of education, in addition to causing a very bad impact on the growth of children, will also play a great harm to the relationship between husband and wife.
In daily life, the contradictions between husband and wife most of the time occur when they are educating their children.
So let's use a few factual cases to experience what is table-breaking parenting, to see if this parenting method also exists objectively in your family, if there is a similar situation, it must cause alarm.
Scenario one
When it's time for dinner, the family members are ready to sit down and eat together, and only the children will still be staring at the TV screen.
The mother screamed a few words, but the child did not hear it, did not pay attention to the mother, the mother shouted loudly several times, and then the mother's tone began to become serious, but the child actually did not react.
At this time, the father on the side also urged the child, and although the child replied with his mouth, his body still did not move.
At this time, the grandmother who loved her grandson stood up and said that the meal was still hot, and let the child see it again, and I would go over and feed it to her later.
Scenario two
Children will go to English tuition classes every week, so mothers will generally let their children prepare English words for 15 to 20 minutes at this time around 2 o'clock.
But today the child has been noisily saying that he wants to watch cartoons, and the mother patiently discusses with the child, but the child has been making trouble, and he is unwilling.
Seeing that dad was next to him, he went straight into his dad's arms and sprinkled it.
At this time, the father should have the same attitude as the mother.
But unexpectedly, the father did not stand on the side of the mother, but indulged the child, saying that if she went, the child would have a weekend off, and he would be busy with various cram schools, and the happiness of childhood would be gone.
When we look at the two cases, we can feel that the couple has differences on the issue of the education of their children.
I found that the child did not respond to the mother's teaching and demands, but showed great attachment in front of the father and grandmother.
Parents should have a deep understanding of this kind of problem.
When the child's behavior deviates or expresses yourself, and you are trying to establish a parental attitude and educate the child with a serious face, your husband's other half or other family members in the family not only do not cooperate with you, but also interrupt you, and spoil the child in the way of denying you, resulting in what you say in the end, and the child will not listen.
Therefore, there are differences of opinion among family members on the issue of educating children, which is often played out in many families.
According to relevant polls, nearly 80% of parents talk about educating their children together, and there are more and more family disputes due to different educational concepts.
Generally speaking, when educating children, there are two ways for families to dismantle the stage:
| 01 | Soft and hard, lose prestige in front of children
Adults educate children, and if there is a disagreement in front of the child, it is extremely detrimental to educating the child.
When the mother educates the child, the grandparents are partial to the child and make excuses for the child, the mother's authority will be challenged, and the child will be more arrogant.
| 02 | Be tough and stick to your opinions
One parent, who said of her own experience, said that when the two people first got married, they had no children and rarely quarreled.
Since having children, the number of quarrels in a month has skyrocketed, and the husband and wife have always been unable to agree on various educational problems of children.
Adults discipline children and argue about children in front of children, which is the most unfavorable to children.
Because if you quarrel with each other, it will lead to the ineffectiveness of anyone's methods in the end, which can only encourage the child to go his own way.
When faced with these differences, should parents introspect in time, lead by example, and adjust their own educational methods? Here's a little advice for you:
| 01 | Family members communicate in a timely manner and establish a unified discourse
At any time, communication is an extremely important thing, and parents should often communicate more on the issue of education.
When there is a problem with children's education, they can express their own views, but there is only one purpose, for the good of the child, the ways and methods can be adjusted to each other, as far as possible to understand each other's intentions, respect each other's expressions, and finally form a unified opinion.
| 02 | Parents take turns with their children and can do both soft and hard
We often say that parents often sing a red face and a white face, but in the end it is all to educate the child, not to educate the child when they want to educate each other.
Don't show that there are differences between the two sides in front of the child, communicate privately, and unify your attitude in front of the child.
A good husband and wife relationship can provide a good atmosphere environment for educating children, and couples should work together, divide labor and cooperate, and be intimate, so that children can truly feel right and wrong, healthy growth.
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