Although born into a rural family that was not very wealthy, Cao Qian was also a child held in the palm of her parents' hands. Since childhood, she has studied well, and the little girl is also a typical example of "other people's children" in the mouths of other parents.
Parents do not realize that their children have grown up, fooling the life they want to live, blindly "controlling", Cao Qian has become a rebel, "the results have plummeted" not to say, but also went abroad for 17 years to cut off contact.
From a well-behaved girl to an unfilial daughter whose parents are not willing to meet when they are dying, is there any hidden feeling in Cao Qian's choice? Listen to the childlike character Ji slowly.
Parents take care of everything
In 1979, Cao Qian was born in an unknown village in Dalian, her parents made a living from farming, and the family conditions were relatively general. Cao Qian is the only daughter of the family and has been loved by her family since she was a child.
Even if it is said that it is held in the hand for fear of falling, it is not too much to say that it is afraid of melting in the mouth. After a lifetime of shaving food in the field, the parents of the Cao family naturally hope that their children can use their knowledge to break out of a way of life and live the life of a city person.
As a result, learning became the only thing girls had to do until they were 18 years old.
Cao Qian's health was not very good when she was young, but also because she was weak and sickly, no matter what needs she had, her parents would try to meet her. Even the old two are reluctant to eat or wear, but they are willing to buy expensive supplements for their children to eat.
All parents do is hope to create a good condition for their children and give her a good future. To say that the only requirement for children is to study well.
Anything other than that, like doing laundry, mopping the floor, cooking, and other chores, becomes a matter of "no need for you" and "all this is a waste of your time" in the mouths of your parents.
With such teachings from her parents, Cao Qian naturally did not hear anything out of the window, and it could be said that she did not have to care about anything, and only read the books of the sages.
All the affairs of life are all taken care of by her parents, so in terms of learning, Cao Qian has never disappointed her parents, her grades are really good, and there is always a place for her in the top three of the class. This naturally makes Cao Qian a role model for other parents.
People around them praised their children, and the parents of the Cao family naturally accepted all the orders. When they are outside, the old couple will also praise their daughter's filial piety. "Your child is really sensible and filial", this is the most favorite words of the Parents of the Cao Family.
Elementary school, junior high school, high school, Cao Qian was admitted to the local school with excellent results. The walls of the home are plastered with various awards in the eyes of their parents, which is a blueprint for a better future, and they always believe that their daughter will have a big success.
Life is so plain, the college entrance examination quietly came. Cao Qian, who had better grades, had already had an idea in her heart, and only waited for the results to come out, so she applied for the university in the south to meet the outside world.
But when she told her parents about her idea, she was met with extremely harsh opposition. "You can only apply to the local university!" That's what my father said. "If you leave us, how are you going to live?" These are the words of the mother full of worry.
Obedient girls don't want to be "controlled"
Far beyond a score line of several tens, Cao Qian has achieved very good results, but her wishes seem to be difficult to achieve. Her father's toughness and mother's obstruction were like a basin of cold water, splashing Cao Qian's heart.
But the little girl who seemed to be resigned was not willing to compromise, and the well-behaved daughter rebelled, and the first time she quarreled with her parents, and then quietly filled out two southern universities, and the third volunteer filled in the local school.
Unfortunately, the results were not satisfactory, and Cao Qian eventually entered a local university nearby. As if they had won the battle, the parents of the Cao family happily prepared the supplies for their daughters to start school, while saying the words "even God is on our side".
It was also these nagging that made Cao Qian's temper worse and worse, and gradually closed her heart. In fact, parents do not want their children to go to other places, not only because of limited family conditions, but also because they are worried that Cao Qian will go to other places alone, her life is not familiar, and there will be too many unpredictable things.
But they did not say what they had in mind, but just blindly hit, which Cao Qian could not accept. What her parents did made Cao Qian feel controlled, like a marionette.
It was also after this that she rarely talked to her parents about her heart, and only took the initiative to call when she was short of money.
Also in order to get rid of what she thinks is "controlled" and to "retaliate" against her parents' opposition, Cao Qian shows her rebellion to the fullest. She began to make friends with "bad boys", learned to compare herself with classmates from superior families, and even did not return home at night.
And at the end of her studies, the girl who has always been excellent lied, she called her parents and told each other that she might not be able to finish her career because of the 6 subjects, and now the only way out is to study abroad.
In fact, with the conditions of Cao Qian's family, it is not easy for her to finish college, let alone go abroad. Therefore, the first thing that the two sons thought of was to reject their daughter and persuade her to study hard in the final stage and make up for the previous course.
Cao Qian's emotions were ignited by the fact that her parents, who had been "obedient" to herself, once again questioned her future plans.
She angrily accused her parents of being falsely kind for years and not really thinking about herself. After the calm, he described to his parents the benefits of returning to work after studying abroad.
Listening to the daughter's words into the heart, the parents of the Cao family began to waver, which showed that the parents were still hesitant, Cao Qian was furious, and then no matter how the other party contacted, she did not respond.
As if to prove that her love for her child has always remained the same, but also to let the child achieve what she calls a good future. The two sons, who did not want their daughter's future to be ruined, rushed around borrowing money, taking out all their savings and carrying a foreign debt of 70,000 yuan, which reached Cao Qian's hands.
The basic cultivation of children is the most important
After getting the funds she wanted to go abroad, Cao Qian did not ask the source of the money, and naturally accepted it and went from school to Germany.
Parents who are far away from home do not know that this difference is 17 years. During this period, Cao Qian also called her parents, but the tone of her mouth and only talking about money made her father very cold. After a few words of scolding, Cao Qian unilaterally broke off contact.
How hard is it for a parent who has never been out of the province in his life to find a daughter in a foreign country? The Cao family's parents simply had no choice but to wait.
In the 17 years of waiting, the two have regretted that they had misspoken in the last phone call, and their bodies have also had problems. The Cao family's father had kidney cancer and his mother had breast cancer, and the biggest wish of the two was to see their daughter again.
The strong thoughts in their hearts made them burst out with great energy, through many searches and inquiries, and even asked for help from the relevant media, the two old people who had waited for 17 years finally had news after several twists and turns.
Cao Qian, her daughter, who had been missing for many years, had already changed her name, restored her former good student status, and became a tenured professor at the University of Munich. She became a successful person in the eyes of her parents, but in the face of her sick parents, she chose not to see each other again.
Someone once asked Cao Qian why she did not go home to see her parents, cao Qian's answer was that she was busy with work and had no time, and most importantly, the home was too depressed, and she just wanted to escape.
This girl who had been held in the palm of her hand and lived still did not understand the thoughts of her parents at that time, only that the other party was in control of her.
Communication is always the most important bridge between people. If the parents of the Cao family could express their own worries and difficulties at that time, instead of blindly issuing orders and forcing their children to act according to their own instructions; if Cao Qian could declare her "complaints", perhaps things would not have developed to this point.
Some people say that there is a problem with Cao Qian's character development, so her parents will have to take on certain responsibilities.
When Cao Qian was young, her parents were obedient to her and did not let her touch anything other than study, which naturally made it easy to develop the "selfish" and "arbitrary" personalities of other people.
Instead of taking into account that people will have their own thoughts when they grow up, they are blindly treated as orders of children, and the consequences of children's rebellion are often a kind of harm to both parties.
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