Parents are loved children, naturally also hope to educate the child very well, children sometimes make mistakes, parents will choose to correct the child's mistakes, but patience is always limited, some children do not obey, parents refer to just a few times or do not correct, the child's left ear into the right ear out of the mistakes made several times will be repeated, parents will be very angry, lose patience will yell at the child, teach the child.
Parents feel that this is more useful than reasoning with children, in fact, this is not the case, children are not animals, what they need is the love of their parents, not yelling, children who are "yelled" by their parents may have many character defects, and these character defects are more difficult to change the more they grow up, and some will even accompany the child's life.
First, the child may form a flattering personality
Little tomato's father and mother divorced, small tomato with mother life, mother a woman with small tomato life pressure is very large, temper is also good and bad, this night, mother accompanied by small tomato to write homework, small tomato can not do a problem, mother will yell at small tomato: you are a waste, such a simple problem you can not do, should your father do not want you, I already know that I do not want you.
After listening to her mother's words, the little tomato was tearful, she wanted to comfort her mother, and her mother directly knocked off her hand: Don't touch me with your hand, you are a pig, and the simplest problem will not be.
Mother often to the little tomato like this, the little tomato slightly wrong on the words to greet the ancestors of the small tomato family eighteen generations, for the mother's roar, the little tomato is very afraid, sometimes the mother raises the decibel she will tremble.
Children for the parents of the yelling is sometimes very afraid, parents roar more, the child may form a flattering personality, just as the little tomato mother roared, the child will feel that he is very bad, he is the beginning of all misfortune, he is sorry for his mother, he wants to use his own way to please the mother, thus forming a flattering personality.
This personality will also spread to the future, no matter who the child meets, he will subconsciously please, let others pick others first, silently suffer losses, and never live happily.
Second, children may be autistic
Parents have long yelled at their children because they have done something wrong, and some children have delicate minds and will feel that they are the source of all evil.
Over time, the child will become very inferior, he is not willing to socialize with others, is not willing to contact anyone, and is not willing to tell his parents about his own thoughts, these things have no one to help him relieve, he may be autistic, and even depressed.
Third, the child is insecure
Xiaohong's parents are civil servants, there are always colleagues around to compare the child's grades, Xiaohong belongs to the children with medium grades, this day the father drank too much wine, came back to Xiaohong and yelled: You are really a waste, the colleague's child took the first grade, you, you are counting down, how can you be so stupid.
After her mother returned, she also reprimanded Xiaohong, why the results were so poor, which made her humiliated.
Parental lessons may make children feel insecure, so that children do not feel the love from their parents, they think of parents may think of lessons and endless yelling, insecure children at home will not be able to lift their heads, they will become very introverted, do not dare to express their thoughts.
When they grow up, they will be like this, no matter where they are, they can't lift their heads, and when they work, they don't dare to say an idea, and they can only cower.
Parents want to educate their children, can not always yell at the child, yelling children is also easy to lead to the rupture of parent-child relationship, there are many children to the adolescent rebellious period, the parents' yelling can only be counterproductive, make them more rebellious, even in order to confront the parents on the road of no return, regret for a lifetime, parents to scientific education of children, to start from the child's psychology, to understand what the child is thinking, why the child wants to do this.
If your child is worried about how to discipline your child, you may wish to buy a book of emotional intelligence training for your child, use the form of picture books to attract your child's attention, help your child understand, and cultivate a good character for your child in a scientific way of education.