Parents judge whether their children are "good children", often have a relatively crude standard, that is, whether children will "talk back" with themselves.
The average parent feels that it is not a good child who resists, and it is a well-behaved child who does not resist the mouth, and will certainly be excellent when he grows up, but the truth is not necessarily so.
Hang Hang is a child who likes to talk back, when his mother educates Hang Hang, he always wants to express his opinions, always "unconvinced" by what his mother says, almost no time can quietly accept the mother's language education, which makes the mother very headache. After all, with such a child who likes to talk back, the parents' hearts will really become very tired.
Although Su Su and Hang hang are neighbors, Su Su's personality is completely different from Hang Hang.
Su Su is recognized as a good child in the community, always very obedient, when Su Su's mother educated Su Su, Su Su was always silently taught, not noisy, not noisy, not mouthed, is simply a model of a good child.
In the blink of an eye, twenty years have passed, both children have grown up, and when people look at these two children again, they find that they have not rated them correctly when they were young.
Children who love to talk back when they are young may not be unsuccessful when they grow up
Hang Hang, after growing up, is a very assertive person, whether in life or work and study, is a "vigorous" posture, work efficiency is very high, for the development of things trend of the judgment is very strong, personality is more rational, a proper embryo of a successful person, which makes many people very surprised.
In fact, the reason why Hanghang has become excellent after growing up is because he "loves to resist the mouth", and the love of the mouth is not a sign of disobedience, but a manifestation of strong subjective thoughts, courage and thought, generally these children have strong initiative and enthusiasm, and they often like to carry out efficient methods when doing things and learning, so these children are more likely to approach success when they grow up.
Of course, not all children who love to talk back as children will become excellent, and there are exceptions to this.
Some children love to resist not because they have their own opinions, but because they are "selfish" and "overbearing", do not allow their interests to be harmed in the slightest, do not know how to look at things with a long-term perspective, have poor communication skills, do not know how to share, etc. The purpose of their mouths is to avoid all words and deeds that cause harm to their own interests.
And these will make children become more stubborn, narrow-minded, and will lose everywhere when they grow up.
Children who do not like to talk back when they are young may not be excellent when they grow up
Twenty years later, Su Su, unlike what people expected, Su Su did not become very good, but was very ordinary, there was no advantage, but there was no obvious disadvantage, and it felt like an ordinary person who could no longer be ordinary.
The reason why Su Su has become like this is actually very much related to Su Su's "not speaking up" personality. Su Su is very obedient, but this also leads to Su Su's enthusiasm for doing things is not high, the initiative is poor, although it can be developed in accordance with the educational direction of parents and teachers, but the sense of autonomy is very poor, and what to do needs to be reminded by others.
Over time, Su Su has become a person without a "main heart", he does not know what his ideal is, he does not have a goal in life, he can do things well, he will not make mistakes, but he also does not seek perfection, and he exerts the way of moderation to the extreme.
On the one hand, Su Su was a failure because he didn't achieve the best people expected.
But it's not that all the children who don't talk back have become moderate like Su Su:
If the child is not relented because of inferiority, cowardice and other reasons when he is a child, then these children may encounter many thorns on the road to growth because of their inner sensitivity, and when they grow up, they are likely to still keep their promises and do everything.
If children are young because of their calm personality and strong overall view, they will most likely be more successful when they grow up, because they have strong planning skills and can effectively use factors such as time, resources and interpersonal relationships to build their own life path, they will often be very good.
Therefore, the gap between children who like to talk back and do not like to talk back is obvious, but this gap is good or bad, but it also depends on the specific situation, whether the child likes to talk back or not, parents need to find the reasons for it, eliminate the unfavorable factors in the child's growth process, and guide the child to develop towards excellence.
Treat children who love to talk back
In the face of children who like to talk back, parents should analyze what the child is talking about, if the child is reasonable and well-founded, in line with the child's own speech angle, then parents need to respect the child's opinion, for the correct opinion parents should be recognized, for the different angles and incorrect opinions, to be explained and explained, so that the child can recognize their own shortcomings from an objective point of view, so that the child can be upwards in everything, have an opinion, and continue to grow on the right path.
Treat children who don't talk back
For children who do not speak up, parents should pay more attention to it, because the inner hidden nature of children who do not speak up is relatively deep, and parents need to understand the real reason why children do not speak up through careful observation and contact, is it because of the child's trust in parents? Or do you feel inferior? Or is the big picture strong?
If the child does not resist because the child's independent thinking ability is poor, or there are some negative factors such as lack of self-confidence and inferiority, then parents should intervene as soon as possible to help the child rebuild self-confidence, guide the child to think independently, and let the child form an independent personality, rather than a personality that has always been attached to the parents.
Write at the end
Children who do not resist are not necessarily obedient, children who resist are not necessarily bad, parents should recognize the original reason, see the facts, and usually pay more attention to children to help children grow up healthily.
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