Letting go of children is a compulsory course for every parent

Julie Lythcott, director of freshman life at Stanford University and education expert — Haims mentions in "How to Raise an Adult" that more and more new students with excellent grades and theoretical learning have poor self-care ability. She also said: "We send a signal to the child, 'Hey, kid, you can't do anything without me.'"

With our over-help, over-protection, over-guidance, and over-caring, we deprive our children of the opportunity to build self-efficacy. And it happens to be an important norm of the human mind, far more important than the self-esteem built through parental praise. ''

Letting go of children is not an easy task, but it is a compulsory course for every parent. Because the real love of parents is to let children separate from their own lives as soon as possible and become an independent and complete individual. On the contrary, if parents do not know how to let go as soon as possible, it is difficult for children to form an independent personality. Once separated from his parents, he will be useless, unable to be autonomous, lack of confidence, unable to take responsibility...

Yin Jianli, an expert in china's youth education and the author of "A Good Mother Is Better than a Good Teacher", also said: "Strong maternal love is not a permanent possession of children, but a decent exit. The first task of motherhood is to be intimate with the child and take care of the child's growth; The second task is to separate from the child and promote the child's independence. ”

To truly love children, we should completely let go of our hands and let them try, grope, and do their own things. In this way, children can become more and more independent, excellent, and in the future with their own hands to create their own future.