Today I recommend a book to my mothers, "Learn to Speak Again After Becoming a Mother"!
Mother's words should be the most gentle upbringing. The best education exists in every word and every interaction of the mother. What the mother once said may become a light that illuminates the child's life. Hopefully, every child can get courage, encouragement, and trust from their mother.
This book starts from cultivating children's self-esteem and social attributes, allowing children to be the masters of emotions, guiding children to learn to resolve contradictions in several aspects, telling a mother how to talk to her children, how to insist on understanding the child's inner thoughts in trivial daily life, thinking and communicating from the child's point of view, and then shaping the child's heart.
Parent-child education is a practice, not to cultivate children, the most important thing is actually to cultivate oneself. Don't get lost in your limited experiences, experiences, and cognitions and forget to help your child find "happiness in the moment."
In fact, after reading the whole book, the two words that flashed the most in the brain were "empathy", when the child made a mistake, when the child faced the problem, the mother should first empathize to understand the child, the simple child actually has only one idea behind it, that is, I hope to get the love and affirmation of the mother. Therefore, it is more important to be a good example, dig into the child's innermost thoughts, and cultivate her self-esteem, self-confidence.
The phrase "it's all for your own good" became a hurtful sentence
The TV series "Little Joy" has resonated with countless parents. Song Qian, as Yingzi's mother in the play, left a deep impression on the audience, and we do not care whether the educational method implemented by Yingzi's mother to her daughter is right or wrong, just in terms of the way she speaks to her daughter, as a child's mother is indeed unqualified, which can be seen from their daily dialogue. Ying zi's mother's love for her daughter in her heart is undeniable, but when this "love" comes out of Ying Zi's mother's mouth again and again, it seems to have changed its taste, song Qian in consulting the child's opinion, there is a kind of "imposed" inquiry, bringing to the daughter is sad and desperate again and again, and the development is also diagnosed with depression later.
When the mother begins to grow, the child can grow. Children will not grow into what we want them to be, but will grow into who we are. I hope that children can get praise and encouragement from their elders, not blame; hope that children can laugh with their peers in a relaxed atmosphere, rather than compete; hope that every child can be cared for and loved; words about love and gratitude, recognition and empathy, sincerity and happiness can purify children's hearts.
The meaning of parental existence is not to give children a comfortable and prosperous life, but when you think of your parents, your heart will be full of strength, you will feel warm and have the courage and ability to overcome difficulties, so as to obtain the true joy and freedom of life.
Come on! Moms~