Some time ago, a married friend was depressed and talked to us, saying that she and her in-laws had recently fallen out, the cause was that this friend had a stomach disease a few days ago, got up in the morning and vomited, was found by the mother-in-law, thought she was pregnant, joyfully and the neighbors showed off, and also said: Look at my daughter-in-law's face, it must be a big fat grandson, and there are people in our family.
As a result, the next day the mother-in-law asked her what the due date was, she was confused, saying that I was not pregnant, and after getting a positive reply, the mother-in-law changed her face again, saying that she was pretending. My friend was very crying and laughing, I never told you that I was pregnant, what did I wear? It's just that you think too much about it.
Perhaps realizing that it was her own problem, the mother-in-law was embarrassed and used the topic to play, pointing to her nose and warning her: If you can't have a child in the past two years of marriage, I will let my son divorce you.
This sentence made the friend angry, flipped the table on the spot, quarreled with the mother-in-law, and finally the husband swore to heaven, assuring her that the pregnancy and childbirth were all decided by herself, and he accepted both boys and girls. That's the end of it.
The friend said breathlessly: Before getting married, my mother-in-law was good to me, and said that after you two young people live a life, I will never interfere, but now the face has become really fast, to put it bluntly, doesn't she just want a grandchild? I saw that their family seemed to have a throne to inherit, so they wanted a boy.
In fact, this is also an idea in the hearts of many old people now, because there will be a feudal idea of son preference in their hearts, so they are also very eager to hope that their daughter-in-law can get pregnant as soon as possible after marriage, and it is best to give birth to a boy, so that everyone will be happy.
Especially now that the three-child policy has been implemented, many friends around xiaobian have responded to the call and begun to have three children, many of whom want to add another male.
But I think boys and girls are all equal, just as important. And for the couple, he is your child, and that will not change in any way. In addition to raising this little life to grow up, the relationship between the husband and wife is also very important, after all, only the other half will be the one who accompanies you in this world until you are old.
"The first child is a girl, and the mother-in-law has not come to see her for a year"
After three years of marriage, Qianqian and Li Jiang finally welcomed their first child. When she was pregnant, her mother-in-law greeted her warmly, and often touched Qianqian's stomach and said, I really hope this fetus is a boy, so that our old Li family has a queen.
Li Jiang also echoed on the side, yes, I also want boys, boys are so good, after being glanced at by Qianqian, I changed my mouth consciously, girls or girls.
Privately Qianqian asked Li Jiang, do you really want a boy? Are you also so patriarchal?
Li Jiang chuckled and said, it is better to be a boy, and then a girl, and it is better to have both children and daughters. Rest assured, I like boys and girls, after all, they are our children.
Nine months later, the newborn fell to the ground as a girl. The moment she heard the child's gender, the mother-in-law changed her face at that time in the hospital, turned her head and left, only to throw a sentence at Li Jiang, the land of the old home cannot be left unattended, I have to go back quickly, the child you husband and wife take care of it.
Qianqian was a caesarean section, stayed in the hospital for more than a week before being discharged home, the wound was painful and uncomfortable, but she also had to take care of the baby, making her tired and tired.
Her husband had to go to work during the day and didn't like to tease the children when he came home at night, and Qianqian began to realize that he didn't really like girls, but in fact, he still wanted a boy in his heart.
She didn't say anything, she didn't ask anyone for help, and she gritted her teeth and persevered. Until the children reached the age of one, the mother-in-law never came to visit their granddaughter at their home, not even a phone call, not a video.
"Forced me to give birth to a boy in the second year of a caesarean section?" Beautiful thoughts"
Who knew that when the child was on his first birthday, the mother-in-law unexpectedly came.
She bought the baby some small gifts, with nice skirts, snacks, candy, etc., to coax the child to be very happy. After waiting until late at night and putting the baby to sleep, the mother-in-law came to the couple's room and said to them, I actually have something to do this time, the child is also one year old, I think Qianqian you should have a second child.
Qianqian narrowed her eyes and asked her: Mom, when I gave birth to the eldest, I was born by caesarean section, I can't have a baby so soon, the doctor told me, saying that the fastest will be two years later.
The mother-in-law narrowed her eyes and said, you don't have to listen to the doctor, they just love to scare people. You will be 30 next year, if you wait another year, in case this fetus is a girl again, when will I have to wait until my eldest grandson will be born? Take advantage of the fact that you are young now, and get pregnant quickly.
My husband even advised Qianqian: "My mother is right, or we will ask for another one." I'm not saying that I prefer sons to daughters, but I want a boy, and how good it is to have children and daughters. ”
Her husband's words completely angered Qianqian, and she yelled at the two people: "You really have enough, is the boy so important?" The doctor told me that I had to wait at least two years after a caesarean section before I could get pregnant again, but who of you ever paid attention to my body? ”
Then she accused her mother-in-law: "Mom, after I gave birth to this child, did you come to see me and see this child?" From the day she was born, until now, I have taken her little by little by myself. You are also a mother, you are also a person, and you know the hard work. Just because I gave birth to a girl, you can't bear to watch me suffer alone, even if you have a lot of time, you won't come and help me, right? ”
Then she turned to her husband and said, you are not much better, I did not expect you to be such a hypocritical man, the mouth said that you are not patriarchal, but simply like boys, want children and daughters. But how many times have you hugged your daughter since she was born, and how many times have you changed her diaper? When you are in a good mood, touch the child's small face and yell at her when you are in a bad mood.
I have only been having a caesarean section for one year, and you are so anxious to urge me to have a second child, if the second child is still a daughter, is there still a third child, and the third child is still a daughter? Are you about to kick me out of the house? I'm just a tool for you to give birth to boys, am I? Or is this child not counted as a member of your Li family, so none of you have a fancy to her?
Don't ignore the feelings of motherhood for the sake of your children
After Qianqian vented this call to the two people, the mother and Li Jiang seemed to have found out in their conscience, and after a long time they did not come back to her trouble, nor did they offer to let her conceive a second child, want a boy or anything like that.
Qianqian did not feel happy, just a secret sigh in her heart, she did not know whether it was a blessing or a curse for such a family, but also very poor for her daughter, grandma and father did not like her very much, in this family only she was truly in love with this child.
After having children, many people will ignore the feelings of being an adult and a mother, and rightfully think that since they are mothers, they must make concessions for their children everywhere and sacrifice for their children.
But we forget that the mother is also a person, before becoming a mother, she is actually a child, but also her own joy, her own pain, her own fear of people and things, and after having a child, she will become unprecedentedly powerful, just to support her child a warm harbor.
Like her husband and mother-in-law, they don't consider Qianqian's physical condition, and they are anxious to urge her to have a second child, and the practice of asking for a boy is really too chilling. Some people say that a woman can know whether the person around her is a person or a dog once she has a child, and this sentence is really half true. Some people, no matter how much they care about you and how good they are to you on the surface, but in the face of such a big event, they will always show their truest side, which may make you feel happy from the bottom of their hearts, and may also be hypocritical and heinous.