Text/Dahui
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Life is a process of continuous saving, at the beginning we came to this world empty-handed, with the growth of age has been constantly saving, constantly storing energy, the more we go back, the more we know things, the more things we see through, but we begin to chase a streamlined life.
In the past, I would always keep putting things in my pocket, constantly expanding my network to expand resources, pursuing a lively life, unable to endure loneliness, and would be proud of the friends around me, at that time I was not allowed to have any time to be alone, I could not endure loneliness, and I would always continue to travel around in the noise.
The first half of life is actually a process of continuous exploration and exploration, many times we do not know what we really need, but have a strong herd mentality, it is easier to follow the current. They will also take the eyes of others very seriously and dare not stick to themselves.
I am afraid that others will feel that I am too lonely, unsociable, and unable to tolerate the pointing of others, so I prefer to put down my self-commission and seek perfection. Even if you like to stay alone, you don't dare to insist, don't dare to refuse the invitation of others, and are afraid of hurting the relationship between each other.
At that time, although the whole person was sharp, in fact, many times he lived carefully. Don't dare to be yourself, blindly submit to accommodation, and can't live out your truest self.
As I grew older, I saw through many things, and I also understood the relationship between people, and I began to know how to break away, no longer easily led by others, but more aware of sticking to my heart.
When people reach middle age, the more sober they live, they slowly understand the importance of solitude and live more and more "alone".
Seeing through the human condition, I am not willing to submit against my heart
When people reach middle age, they basically live to understand. Many people's truths in life can only be understood at that stage, and only through experience can they see through people's hearts.
In the past, I always thought that people's minds were very simple, and I always felt that as long as I treated others sincerely, I would be able to get the same return, and I used to treat people with a mind, and then I was betrayed and hurt by people, and I began to understand the complexity of human nature.
In fact, many times the relationship between people is the exchange of interests, when you are not profitable, others will naturally ignore you, when you are not at a level, the two sides can not reach the basic exchange of interests, only one side of the unlimited demand, then the relationship will come to an end.
The relationship between the two families of Zhou Bingyi and Hao Dongmei in "In the World" can be said to have taught everyone a lesson. The two families are not a circle of people at all, and naturally there is no way to force them together. From the moment Zhou Bingyi came forward to help Cai Xiaoguang to trust the relationship, the relationship between the two families was truly exposed.
Any relationship is only naturally perpetuated by helping each other. Zhou Bingyi's ordinary workers' family could not help Hao Dongmei, it would only cause them trouble. Once the mouth is opened, what they get is unlimited taking, and their disconnection is very realistic but sober.
Even if it is a good relationship, once it is mixed with interests, then naturally there is no way to continue. The subsequent betrayals of Chun Yan and Debao undoubtedly illustrate this point.
When people reach middle age, they understand people's hearts and see through the involvement of interests, so they are unwilling to get involved and are unwilling to submit against their hearts. It is better to simply live.
Begin to know how to break away and enjoy a streamlined life
When I was young, I always pursued a lively pursuit, liked to attend various parties, and liked to meet all kinds of friends.
And as we get older, relationships that once thought they were good ended up stranded by time. Many people lay silently in their address books and never contacted again.
In the past, in the face of the people around them, they would be lost, but then they slowly understood that drifting away in life was the norm. When they are on the same road, they accompany each other on a journey, and at a certain stage, they are no longer on the same road, and they will naturally be separated.
In the past, it was sad to passively break the connection, and then slowly began to take the initiative to break the connection, and would no longer be confused by hypocrisy, but knew how to cherish the people who were truly worthy.
Start to cut off some hypocritical friends, give up some of the intertwined but meaningless social interactions, get rid of those dispensable relationships, and begin to enjoy a streamlined life. At a certain stage, we need to clean up the people around us. When people reach middle age, they don't have to have too many friends, those who are not sincere do not have to stay in life, and there are fewer and fewer people around, but what is left is very important.
Streamline your social circle and leave your limited energy to those who deserve it.
Don't care about other people's eyes, just want to be loyal to yourself
A person who cares too much about the eyes of others will never live his own life well. You always care too much about the evaluation of others, dare not refuse, do not dare to go against the wishes of others, for fear of provoking criticism from others, afraid that others will think that you are not easy to get along with, and choose to leave you.
But do you care about it in exchange for the cherishing of others? In most cases, your forward-looking and backward-looking fears will only make others ignore you more and more and not care about your feelings.
People are actually quite tired in this life, so there is no need to make themselves unhappy because of some insignificant things and some unworthy people.
In the first half of my life, I always cared too much about the eyes of others, and never really lived for myself. In middle age, most of life has passed, and in the second half of life, I really don't want to embarrass myself because of others anymore, but I just want to be loyal to my heart and completely live myself.
If you don't want to attend a party, you don't want to participate, and you don't have to participate against your heart on an occasion you don't like. Like to stay alone is a straightforward statement, do not have to be afraid of not being social, do not have to care about the evaluation of others, live out their own is the most important.
People who travel around in the midst of staggering chips may not be really happy, and people who enjoy being alone are actually not lonely, they are just living the way they like.
When people reach middle age, those who come and go alone are really sober.
This uniqueness is a symbol of maturity, they no longer pursue superficial hilarity, nor will they merge into some disliked occasions against their hearts, but know how to be loyal to their hearts and live according to their favorite ways.
See through the sophistication of people, read the hearts of people, understand the importance of renunciation, no longer yield and accommodation, but also know how to stick to themselves.
People who enjoy being alone are really living and understanding, and for the rest of their lives, they don't look at anyone's face, they only care about their own feelings.