Text/Dahui
Figure/ Originated from the network, intrusion and deletion
In this life, we will deal with all kinds of people, we will meet all kinds of people, some people and you have a spiritual connection, establish a deep connection with each other, they are willing to be close to you, willing to understand you, willing to warm you with their own strength.
In the same way, there will be some people who come to you just to suppress you, bully you, look for a sense of existence and pleasure in your body, and will not care about your feelings at all, and will not be willing to calm down and listen to your voice.
We often hold the greatest sincerity to get along with the people around us, willing to open the door to accept all the people around us, but many times it is not how you treat others, they will treat you in this way, facing some people who are not worthy, what you will get will only be hurt again and again.
Some people understand you, there will be people who misunderstand you, talk about you behind your back, this is for sure, we all live in the eyes of others, inevitably encountered some gossip, stupid people will be the first time to want to explain themselves to everyone, and wise people they often choose to be silent, and will not waste their tongues with some people at will.
Those who are silent are not fools, but because they are good at pretending to be stupid, not because they do not hear those criticisms, but because they do not care.
There is a saying that it is better to compete with the same good than to argue with fools, and when you understand this truth, you will no longer waste your tongue to deal with some low-level people.
Remember to never explain yourself to anyone.
People will only understand what they think and will not listen to your explanations
Zhou Bingyi in "The World of Man" can be said to be a very virtuous person, he is bent on doing practical things for the people, and has encountered a lot of criticism and misunderstanding in the process.
When he was first transferred to the military factory, everyone was not optimistic, they all felt that he was just using his relationship to come in, there was no strength, everyone maintained opposition, unwilling to cooperate with his work.
In order to arouse the enthusiasm of the masses, Zhou Bingyi cited the example of his younger brother Zhou Bingkun at the meeting, hoping that the masses could stand on their own feet, rely on their own strength to change their lives, and conform to the trend of reform and opening up. But I heard a voice at the bottom: "If I have a brother like you who is an official, I will definitely be able to do it." ”
Although Zhou Bingkun did not rely on his brother's relationship at all, and worked his own, others would not believe it at all, even if he explained it more, it would not help.
Many times people have their own preconceived views on a thing, when such ideas are fixed, they will not be easily changed, people will only understand some things according to their ideas, and will not listen to your explanations.
Especially in the face of the achievements of the people around you, everyone will take it for granted that there must be a relationship, and they can't see your efforts at all. You say that no matter how much you say, you will not change their concepts, everyone is not willing to accept the fact that they are inferior to people, they prefer to push everything to fate and to relationships, which is a common phenomenon in life, and will not change their cognition because of your fluttering words, and no one will be willing to listen to your explanation.
People who understand you naturally understand, and people who don't understand you don't have to explain
In this world, it is already a very honorable thing to meet three or five confidants and have a few people who are sincerely willing to understand you, and there is no need to expect everyone to understand you and understand you.
The desire to be understood and recognized by everyone is tantamount to a fool's dream. If we think about what we can't do exactly on our own, how can we count on others if we can't do it ourselves?
Although we all know the truth of "unknown whole picture, no comment", but in reality, few people can do this, in most cases we will randomly criticize others, will judge some things according to their own inherent concepts, evaluate some people, many times we have never understood them at all, we have an inherent understanding of each other, and will not change easily.
In fact, as long as you are a little careful, as long as we are willing to put ourselves in the shoes of others to understand others, we will certainly be able to get the answer we want, the so-called long-term people's hearts, the first glance of intuition is difficult to let you fully understand a person, only after in-depth contact can you really understand.
Some people have cultivated a wordless tacit understanding in the process of continuous getting along, as long as they have a look at each other, they will understand each other's thoughts. There are also some people who can't understand you even if they get along for a long time, because they don't even think about understanding you.
People who understand you don't have to waste your tongue to explain, they will naturally understand that no matter what you do, you can give the greatest understanding and support, and people who don't understand you don't have to explain, and it is difficult to change their thinking no matter how much you say.
Be close to people who understand you, and those who don't understand you will resolutely stay away.
Rather than explaining, proving oneself with actions is the best way
Some people will want to explain as soon as they face the misunderstanding and criticism of others. Spend a lot of time and effort trying to get the other person to dispel their misunderstandings about themselves through words.
There are also some people who care too much about other people's ideas, afraid that others will misunderstand themselves, so they completely give up their egos to accommodate others, pretend to be very social, and finally lose their most precious self.
Neither explanation nor accommodation is the best way, one will make you fall into the abyss of infinity, one will make you unable to see your true self, let yourself live more and more painfully, only silence is right, with action to prove yourself, is the best way.
Back to the example of Zhou Bingyi, he encountered a lot of misunderstandings in his life, but later he rarely explained himself to others, even if he was reported by people under his real name, he did not waste his tongue anymore, he has been doing things impartially, diligently and sincerely for the people, believing that the clean people are self-purifying, and finally the organization will give him a clean, the people will see his efforts, and finally his vision has finally been achieved, completing his father's expectations.
Verbal explanations are too pale and powerless, and only by proving yourself with actions can you completely let others see you clearly, and you can also make yourself feel ashamed.
In the face of other people's misunderstandings, it is really powerful to use actions to support oneself and convince others with results than to waste time explaining.
Never explain yourself to anyone, because it doesn't work at all, and others won't listen to you and will only guess according to their own understanding.
It is enough to have a few people who really understand themselves, and other people's ideas do not have to be too concerned. If you care too much about other people's thoughts, you will only embarrass yourself and make yourself live more and more depressed.
People who understand you naturally understand, and people who don't understand you waste no amount of tongue is useless. There is no need to explain, only with down-to-earth action to prove themselves, with the results to support, not to live up to themselves, is the best way.