Almost all women crave and pursue love, but on the road to love, most of us should be unhappy. As the Russian writer Turgenev put it: Love is an occasional chance.
Not everyone has this opportunity, even so, but I believe that in real life, many women are willing to do whatever it takes to fight the fire in order to pursue the so-called love.
The next thing I want to tell is such a story, in order to protect the privacy of the girl, I named her He Li.
The parties' statements
My name is He Li, I am 32 years old, I work in an advertising agency, and my monthly salary is about 10,000. Seriously, I am living quite miserable now, not only missing the golden marriage period of the best girl, but also the career development is very ordinary, in short, the love career is both frustrated. Although I was born in rural Jiangxi, I have been very idealistic and ambitious since I was a child. So I came to Guangzhou when I was 23 years old and just graduated.
I like the weather in the city of Guangzhou, it is almost winterless, it does not snow all year round, there is a very cold, when I have to wear a down jacket. Of course, my favorite is the rhythm of life of people in guangzhou, a big city. Relatively speaking, Guangzhou is not as slow as the pace of life in small places, nor is it as stressful as life in cities such as Shanghai and Shenzhen.
Back to the point, let's talk about my experience in Guangzhou in the past few years. I feel that I am the epitome of many of your young people, and you will see your own shadow in the words I have written.
When I first came to Guangzhou, I was full of energy, bent on doing something, in this city, completely on my own to get a place, to get ahead.
At that time, my thinking was also very simple, I only talked about a relationship in college, so I still looked forward to love, and often fantasized about who the husband who would accompany me in the future would be, what he would look like, what stories he would have with me, and so on.
Coincidentally, my first boyfriend after work was the one I met when I was doing my first job in Guangzhou, he and I are salesmen, he is not tall, he is not handsome, but the voice is very gentle, but also quite talented, I like it. He is also more capable than me, so he has been promoted to a leadership position, although I have also won the crown, but overall it is still inferior to him.
We were in for three years, and during the two years of cohabitation, I was doing his laundry and cooking for him, and we were going to go home together to prepare for our engagement, but in the end he hesitated, he said that he was now in a period of rising career development and did not want to get married so soon. I truly love him, and I will definitely accompany him.
But since then, he has alienated me and rarely comes home at night. I once did his laundry and saw a woman's mouth mark on his collar, so I sneaked a peek at his phone and he cheated on him. I cried and ran to ask him what was wrong, but he said a little bit of breaking up. That time, I was very hurt by him, but I didn't completely lose faith in love.
I know that it is also because I am too weak, so he will not want me. Therefore, I desperately try to improve myself, at least when I become stronger and better, I also have more capital to pursue love.
A year later, I was in love again. The object of love is a small leader in the factory, very handsome, but from a very poor background, and there are several sisters in the family. I didn't dislike him either, he was pretty good at flirting, so the first time I met him, I felt very called, and he could give me the feeling of love I wanted.
We've been together for about half a year, and most of that half year is when I'm responsible for the cost of dating. I know he's not very capable and it's not easy to make money, so I'm not embarrassed to spend his money.
I was quite sincere with him, but he became unscrupulous because of my kindness to him, and asked me for money at every turn. It wasn't simply a matter of money for me to leave him, but I felt that he didn't love me and was in love with me in order to take advantage of me.
The third boyfriend actually started out to be nice to me, but he was quite macho and a bit of a door-knocker. I was originally pursuing love and didn't mind money so much. So my boyfriend is reluctant to spend money on me, and I generally don't pay too much attention to it.
We talked for a year and he almost never sent me anything. Ever since he was admitted to the civil service, his attitude towards me has been even worse. In the past, he would praise me for being smart and say that I was beautiful, and later he would often say that I was useless. After separating from me, he quickly went on a blind date with a new girl and became engaged to that girl.
My family saw that I had reached this age, and last week they urged me to go home for a blind date, in fact, I was disgusted by the blind date model of knowing the object, too utilitarian, I think it is difficult to have love. But I used to be stupid about pursuing love.
At this age, I understand that women should not pursue love too much. Love love is just a false pretense for thousands of years in this patriarchal society, men in order to manipulate women, self-interest. Men are very realistic, where is there any love that is not loved? Men love themselves the most, love their careers, futures or love money, but they can't love their women the most.
I used to be too emotional, a good youth, and my energy and time were spent on men to pursue those fruitless loves, resulting in a career that did not develop well. If I had been more mentally mature at that time, knowing that love was not the most important thing, planning for my life earlier, shortening the time of love, and entering marriage as soon as possible, it would not be so miserable now.
Yang Yuying said in "Sister Riding the Wind and Waves 2" that for me, love is an embellishment on the cake, very sweet, but only an embellishment. When I was 20, I thought love was the whole of a lifetime, but as I got older, now I accept everything.
He Li's feelings and Yang Yuying's words express the idea of there is a fit, I hope that girls can also understand this truth as soon as possible, love is not the whole of our lives.
You can pursue love, but you must understand that in the hearts of men, many things are far more important than the love you pursue. Girls should not be too attached to love, especially at a certain age, to put their own lives first, do not waste their youth for those fruitless loves, not only waste their youth, but also delay their future.