How to be truly rich in raising children

With love| grow up for life, and every night at 8:00 a.m.

Today, let's talk about raising children.

preface

The child is the heart of the parents, from the moment the child falls to the ground, we always do our best to give the child the best conditions, give her good food, wear well, use good, and materially reluctant to owe the child.

Some parents, even if they are bitter and tired, can not suffer their children.

Do you think that this kind of pampering of children is the realization of true enrichment of children?

In fact, this is wrong, so what should a truly rich child do?

1. The life impact of childhood deprivation on children

Before talking about the real rich child, let's first look at how the lack of childhood affects the child's life.

The feeling of scarcity in childhood refers not only to material deprivation, but more importantly to spiritual deprivation, which generally refers to unmet needs and desires.

Li Xue, a famous family educator, once said: What determines the future prosperity of children is not material but spiritual. Spiritual deprivation will affect a child's life.

The so-called poor for a while, the three generations of poor heart are the best interpretation of this influence. This sentence also tells us that spiritual deprivation will take at least three generations of effort to alleviate.

How did this sense of childhood deprivation arise? Even families with rich material lives may create a sense of scarcity in their children's lives. Let's look at examples from life.

On the child's birthday, we will go out of our way to buy a toy for the child that he has missed for a long time, and after the toy is bought, you will casually tell the child to be careful not to break the toy.

Your intention is to teach your child to cherish his toys. But what is your child's next reaction?

Children will be very obedient and careful with toys, even holding toys reluctant to play, and protecting the toys well. This goes against the child's original intention of wanting toys.

Children crave toys by buying them back and playing with them, or even removing them to see what happened to satisfy their curiosity.

Similarly, when you buy a paintbrush and paint for your child and then tell your child to save on paint, your child should be reluctant to use paint and be generous in painting.

Of course, in this caution, creativity is limited, and although the child is also using brushes and paints, the joy and satisfaction of painting with brushes and paints is missing.

For another example, parents tell their children that skin care products are too expensive, do not use skin care products; our lives are less than the top, more than the bottom.

Language such as this, transmitted to the child is negative energy, is the language that limits the child's desire, the child's body and mind are bound in this negative energy.

These restricted longings quietly accumulate into the child's subconscious, and the child, who is directed by the subconscious, experiences the heaviness of life everywhere:

Children who do not use skin care products because skin care products are too expensive will grow into big girls who hoard a lot of skin care products but are reluctant to use them; children who cannot use toys and pigments generously will grow into adults who dare not face their own desires.

More importantly, adults who dare not face their desires will have a deep sense of unworthiness, and the sense of unworthiness makes them believe that they are not worthy of a good job and do not deserve to enjoy the money they earn easily.

Therefore, the lack of childhood deeply affects the child's life. To make children grow better, what we need to enrich is the child's heart. As Li Xue said, true prosperity is the abundance and flow of the heart.

Bring a good feeling to your child's life

2. How can we make our children's hearts rich and flowing?

This requires us to create good feelings for our children in life. The good feeling of life is not something that can only be achieved by material abundance. In a materially poor family, you can also create a good feeling for your children. The beauty of life has nothing to do with matter.

There is such a friend next to Li Xue, a family education expert, her life is very rich, her personal temperament is also good, and what is more valuable is that her brothers and sisters are like her.

This makes people wonder if their parents have laid a material foundation for them. But in fact, when the family was young, the material conditions were very poor. How can families who are busy with their livelihoods raise children with such temperament?

It turns out that although their material conditions were poor when they were young, their mother never brought them a sense of the heaviness of life, but from time to time brought back some gadgets to them, and from time to time created some small surprises for them, and their mother created a sense of beauty for their lives and let them feel the beauty of life.

Therefore, their childhood subconscious wrote down the pursuit of a better life, and under the command of this subconscious, of course, they have been pursuing a good life, and the unremitting pursuit will of course make their lives more and more beautiful.

Such conclusions can be confirmed in others. There are some people who were born in the era of material poverty, even if they can only eat a meal of meat for half a year, their parents are willing to call friends and children to share happily.

Therefore, what these children feel about life is not the heaviness of material poverty, but the joy of sharing together.

This happiness is also a good way to live. Therefore, under the influence of this precious spiritual temperament, in the case of the improvement of the environment later, they quickly found a way out.

3. Be honest about your child's needs

Another way to make a child's mind rich and fluid is to be honest about responding to the child's needs.

No matter how hard parents try, there will always be times when they can't meet their children's needs. So, when we can't meet the needs of our children, what impact will we have on our children if we can't answer honestly? Let's look at an example like this.

There is a mother, the child likes to buy things, when the child wants to buy a thing, the mother always finds all kinds of excuses to refuse, so the child directly asks the mother: "Why can't you see me happy?"

The child's language is very direct, but the child also sees the rejection of his parents' various needs. It is not that the parent is unable to meet his needs, but does not want his child's needs to be met.

Many parents grew up with a sense of scarcity, so he habitually rejected their children's needs. This will give the child the illusion that he feels that his needs are wrong or that he should not have needs.

Therefore, when we cannot meet the needs of our children, we must answer the children honestly, telling the children that the parents are temporarily unable to meet his needs; or telling the children that they are reluctant to spend money due to the family's financial situation.

If you answer the child honestly, then, even if the child's needs are not met, he will not put the reason on himself, he will know that the parents are not able to meet or the financial situation is reluctant to spend money, this is the parent's problem, not his problem.

His needs are not met, but his needs are still there, and when the child grows up, he will meet his own needs through his own efforts.

Therefore, true prosperity is to create a feeling of a better life for children, even if we can't meet their needs, we must learn to tell children honestly.

summary

Well, today's content ends here, let's summarize it.

First, the lack of childhood affects the child's life, so the real wealth is to make the child's heart full and flowing.

Second, even if the living conditions are poor, we must create beauty for the children's lives and let the children feel the beauty of life.

If you can't meet your child's needs, don't make excuses, but honestly tell your child that you are not capable of meeting your child's needs.