The family is the cradle of children's lives, the first place for education after birth, that is, the first classroom of life; parents are children's first teachers, that is, teachers of enlightenment.
Family Education 13 "How to Do"
Many parents have encountered a lot of confusion in the process of educating their children, from the small children getting up to lose their tempers, to the children lying and rebelling. In the face of such problems, parents are often overwhelmed, in fact, many times, children make mistakes in addition to the child's own problems, and parents also have a certain relationship.
For example, when the child first enters the school, he often loses everything, and usually the first reaction of the parents is to immediately send the child to the school to find it.
Over time, children will form such a concept, anyway, there are parents and mothers, it does not matter if their things are not packed. This is not conducive to the cultivation of children's conscious behavior.
1: How should parents cultivate excellent children?
A: Parents should first strengthen their own learning.
The successful goddaughter experience of a parent of a Tsinghua University student can give us some references. Although the mother's cultural level is not high. However, with the correct goddaughter attitude and method, she cultivated a student whose teacher thought that the intelligence was poor into a high-achieving student of Tsinghua University, and it can be said that the parent's ideological quality is very high. The teacher said that the child could not do it, she did not blame, nor did she scold the child, and the mother's spirit of not giving up the child is worthy of our emulation, and it is the key to the success of the child.
The teacher's words were: "Your child has intellectual problems and there is no hope at all".
When the mother came home and told her son, she said: "The teacher said that you have progress, as long as you work hard, you will continue to make progress." In this way, the child slowly improved under the encouragement of his mother again and again, until one day the child became the best student in the class, and finally entered the door of Tsinghua University.
Therefore, parents should strengthen their learning and learn the recipe of others to teach their children.
2: What should I do if my child wakes up in the morning in a bad mental state?
A: Let your child start each day happily.
The minute when the child just woke up is the key period of the child's mood of the day, many parents reflect that the first thing the child wakes up is to cry, the child cries I lose patience, either hit the child or scold the child, the result of this bad disease is getting more and more serious.
It is better to do this: when it is time to get up or the child has just woken up and turned over, the father or mother goes to the child, gently wakes the child up or caresses the child, gently creaks the child with his hand when the child just opens his eyes; talk to the child about an interesting topic, such as: Daddy guessed you dreamed last night, or that Dad dreamed of you last night, and so on. In short, find a way to get your child excited.
3: What should I do if my child falls?
A: This is a critical moment to teach children to be brave.
When a child is just learning to walk, it is a critical period to cultivate a child's brave spirit. Many successful parents practice that after their child has just learned to walk, the child falls down and allows him to get up on his own. And don't make a fuss about your child falling, if you scream loudly, it will scare your child into crying.
It's better to do this: laugh and tell the child: You're awesome, get up on your own. Although the child can't understand what you mean by being awesome, the child can understand from your expression that this is an affirmation of him, and when he sees your smile, he will bravely climb up.
4: What should I do if my child scolds for the first time?
A: Teach children to be polite.
Many of our parents now, with their newly talking children cursing for fun, do not pay attention to this themselves, so how to manage their children? The child will not distinguish between right and wrong, he will mistakenly think that the smile of the parents is the reward for his behavior, so after a long time, he will unconsciously throw dirty words casually.
At this time, what parents should do is to tell their children that this is dirty talk and are not allowed to say it again, otherwise people will not like you and will not be friends with you.
5: What should parents do when their child has just entered school?
A: The emphasis is on cultivating children's conscious behavior.
For students who have just entered the school, the first thing parents should do is to tell their children what to do when they go to school, how to do in class, how to do the homework assigned by the teacher, what to do when the teacher lectures, and how to play with the children.
This is to pay attention to a little strategy, rather than simply preaching, you can tell the child some stories of diligent learning, when telling the parents should have an appreciative smile, so that the child feels that it is a glorious thing to study well. Then, tell the child how the protagonist in the story does, he listens to the teacher very carefully during the class, the teacher assigns the homework on time, carefully completes, and does nothing if he can't finish the homework.
6: What should I do when my child has a lot of homework?
A: Parents should be cautious about their attitude towards teachers.
I have met many such parents, and when they see their children's homework more, they are distressed and simply complete their homework for their children. This will make him feel that learning should not be a hard thing, so he will think of ways to "reduce the burden" for himself in the future. Slowly doing homework becomes a burden.
It is better to do this: encourage the child to finish it by himself, constantly "cheer" the child up, and accompany the child to complete the homework. Even if it is really painful for the child, he will not find a reason for the child not to do homework in front of the child, and he will not blame the teacher.
7: What if the child does not cooperate with others?
A: Teach your child how to get along with people.
Even in the smallest unit of society, the family, a family of three, if there is no spirit of cooperation, it will go its own way.
A person is inseparable from cooperation throughout the entire life process, at home with parents, children, brothers and sisters; after going to school, to cooperate with classmates and teachers; and when it is time to work, to cooperate with colleagues and friends.
8: What should I do if my child's grades are not good?
A: Pay attention to the cultivation of ability and habits.
Successful children have a common characteristic: good learning habits, the ability to automatically complete learning tasks, and even exceed the task.
As long as you pay attention to the cultivation of children's good learning habits, it is to insert the wings of success for children. Imagine a child who listens carefully to lessons and completes his homework on time with poor grades?
Children's grades are not very ideal, parents should not blame their children, but should find reasons from educational ideas and their own methods of education for their children. At the same time, it should also be noted that the cultivation of children's good learning habits is a gradual process, and it must not be rushed.
9: What should I do if my child does not eat well?
A: Control your child's snacking.
I often see parents chasing their children to let their children eat; I often hear many parents complain that my children are really tired, and when they eat, they often eat a little, even if it is not good to eat.
The solution to these problems is to create a good atmosphere for eating, so that children feel that eating is a happy thing. Parents must not praise or denigrate the quality of the meal in front of the child, even if the meal is really not delicious, it is best not to say.
10: What should I do if my child does not perform well?
A: Don't make vague affirmations or excessive denials about your child's bad behavior.
It is often possible to hear some parents "proudly" say: My child has a special temper, always let people follow, once you choke him, he will be how, how.
Obviously, you have cultivated a little overlord, an unreasonable little emperor. Once such a child reaches society, weaknesses will appear and they will be incompatible with society.
In order for their children to take fewer detours, parents should let their children know that it is wrong to do so. At the same time, the child should also be clear that he is responsible for any of his actions, and different behaviors will have to pay different costs.
11: What should I do if my child lies for the first time?
A: Don't debunk it right away, be strategic.
Children who lie are often because they tasted the sweetness when they first lied, and then the parents did not care, and it is difficult to change after a few times. Every time they lie for a certain purpose, some for not doing homework, some for the fear of punishment for doing something wrong, some to please people, some to get something, and so on.
It's better to do this: don't expose the child right away, but change the strategy and let the child know that lying is wrong. If, on the first mistake, the child is severely punished, then he will be more hidden when he makes a mistake the second time, and will do everything possible not to let you know. Therefore, when encountering children lying, we must be calm, not only let children understand that mistakes should be taken responsibility, but also let children dare to admit mistakes when they make mistakes in the future.
12: What should I do if my child doesn't like to use his brain?
A: Parents consciously ask questions for their children to solve on their own.
There is a saying that is very good, inventors are lazy people, if he is not lazy, he will not want to walk too tired, I want to get something convenient, so the bicycle was born; the bicycle is too backward, the car then appears; the car is still slow, and too constrained, the plane then appears in front of people's eyes, it is their pursuit of the idea of saving trouble driven by the next invention came into being, they rely on continuous thinking, constantly seeking a concise way to solve the problem, so that science continues to develop, Humanity is constantly improving.
Therefore, our approach should be that if the child does not know how to use the brain, then the parent should consciously ask the problem to let the child try to solve it by himself, so that the child will slowly develop the habit of using the brain.
13: What should I do if my child is proud?
A: Don't praise your child too much.
Don't casually praise the beauty of the child, let the child understand that only by paying labor, what is obtained through continuous effort is the capital of pride or pride. Therefore, to let the child understand that the premise of what I can do is that I work hard.
Therefore, to cultivate a child's confident and humble character, it is necessary for the child to realize that the premise of pride or pride is that he has worked hard to achieve, and other things that are not obtained through his own efforts have nothing to be proud of.
epilogue
We summarize the four major reasons that affect the healthy growth and academic performance of children: one is the inattention caused by the child's own body and the inability to concentrate on learning, the second is the parents' nagging anxiety and wrong communication methods, the third is the teacher-classmate relationship in the school, and the fourth is the home arrangement. In order to solve the problem of children's growth and improve children's academic performance, we must adjust and improve from these four aspects at the same time to have obvious progress.
(This article is transferred from Ugly Duckling Middle School, the copyright belongs to the original author, if there is infringement, please contact us to deal with)
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