Aya in the era of writing/pen farming
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Children will encounter many teachers in their lives, and parents usually play the first teacher in their lives.
Many times, children will always be affected by some ears and eyes in getting along with their parents, and the reason why parents are encouraged to teach by example is probably this reason.
Locke, a famous education scholar, once put forward a very famous "whiteboard theory", he believes that every child is born a whiteboard, and what color they will become when others paint on the whiteboard in the later period. That is to say, a child's cultivation education is greatly affected by acquired factors.
Some parents, perhaps with limited horizons and knowledge, worry that they will not be able to give their children good guidance.
In fact, parents can also accompany their children to grow up together, many parents read a lot of books to enrich themselves on the one hand, on the other hand, into educational output, to give their children the teaching on the road of life.
And "To Kill a Mockingbird" is a book worth reading for parents.
This book gives parents an excellent inspiration, allowing parents to grasp the key points in the process of educating their children and give their children the inspiration of life.
The author of this book let parents know that the following three keywords should be understood by children as soon as possible, and their meaning can be correctly interpreted, only in this way can children get sustainable benefits.
One: Smart
Liu Zhenyun said such a thing, which is very sobering, he said: "There is a big river in the world with rough waves, and many people have drowned, and this big river is called smart. ”
Many people can cross the river of "stupidity" and drown in the river of "cleverness".
After the previous generation of people have experienced the suppression of education, they know that children who have grown up in an environment of oppression and criticism will mostly have some psychological characteristics of inferiority, dare not let go of things, do not believe in themselves, and have a strong herd mentality.
So, when you have a child, you go to the other extreme, blindly encouraging the child.
We often hear that parents nowadays like to put words like "Hello awesome" on their lips, and no matter what their children do, they will give positive praise. This in itself is understandable, but everything must have a degree, and when the scale of praise exceeds the degree it should be, it will be too much.
After reading "Kill a Mockingbird", you will understand that words of praise for children can come in many forms, and it is best to give valuable praise according to the child's actual situation, rather than just saying: "Hello is smart".
From childhood to adulthood, children are immersed in their own very smart praise to grow up, in fact, it is also a kind of killing of children.
Smart means high IQ, which means that children have wisdom beyond ordinary people.
Brain experts have studied the brains of geniuses and the brains of ordinary people, and the results of the study have confirmed that even if they are geniuses, the brain has only developed less than seventy percent, they are just more diligent and good at thinking than ordinary people, more probing psychology, and perhaps more fortunate than ordinary people, with many opportunities in life.
Most people in the world are ordinary people, and the IQ gap between smart and stupid people is also very small.
In The Story To Kill a Mockingbird, the little girl's father, Edikos, told his daughter:
"True cleverness is not for boasting, there is no need for people to show everything they know, and there is no need to be arrogant."
Instead of letting your child know how smart he is, tell him how to get it.
Two: Conscience
Edikos's profession was supposed to be a well-respected lawyer, but because he was defending black people and defending the rights and interests of black people, he was always excluded and criticized by others.
In the society at that time, racial differences were still very serious, and the black race was identified as the most inferior race in the world because of its black skin, and they suffered unfair treatment everywhere.
Edikos, on the other hand, became a black defense lawyer.
In his eyes, the negro should not be discriminated against because of the color of his skin, and in his heart, upholding justice and conscience is far more important than being a qualified lawyer in the eyes of the public.
Whenever her daughter was ridiculed and bullied because of her profession, Edikos would tell her daughter very seriously:
"There are some things that can follow the principle of conformity, but there is one thing that absolutely cannot be followed, and that is the conscience of man."
Edikos used his words and deeds to let his daughter understand that a person with a conscience is the most correct, a person with a conscience knows how to do things, has a bottom line, knows how to stick to his inner sense of justice, and will not do things that hurt others.
From an early age, the little girl understands better than others that kindness does not mean cowardice, and that with a conscience, she will not waver in one thing.
People are tempted too much in their lives, and many people abandon their conscience in order to take the so-called shortcut, and when they go astray, they find that it is too late. Every parent should understand as early as possible that maintaining a conscience is as important as keeping the original intention.
Three: Be brave
Bravery is not the exclusive quality of young and strong young people, and in "To Kill a Mockingbird", even a frail old man who is nearly a hundred years old is still the existence of "bravery" in Edikos's mouth.
Bravery is a very good quality of a person, it means to face things and dare to take responsibility, rather than running away from it.
Every parent wants their child to grow into a brave adult, so when a child says that he is afraid of something, some parents will warn his children: "Don't be afraid, be brave." ”
Some parents will even irrationally use the "desensitization method", the more the child is afraid of something, the more they let them do something, the result will sometimes be self-defeating, bringing the child psychological wounds that can not be healed.
The brave will also be afraid, and the brave should be allowed to have something to fear.
Even brave people are normal people, everyone has their own fear of things and dare not face things, this is very normal, do not overcorrect, you have to let the child admit that they are not afraid of anything, this is not the right and wise approach.
Bravery does not mean toughness, they will still be soft when they should be soft, and weak when they should be weak. Let the child grow into a brave person, not a hard person.
Wisdom, conscience and bravery will always accompany children throughout their lives, and the sooner these words are rooted in their hearts, the better they can grow.
The book "To Kill a Mockingbird" is worth reading for every parent, and it will bring great inspiration to their children on the road of educating their children.
This is a coming-of-age textbook about courage and justice, and it is also a very famous parenting treasure book in the world, parents with children at home, do not miss it.
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