1, there is a young woman in the unit, recently divorced, she looks very charming, I have always liked her, and now the opportunity has come. One day I saw her on the road and I walked straight up to her

1, there is a young woman in the unit, recently divorced, she looks very charming, I have always liked her, and now the opportunity has come. One day I saw her on the road, and I went straight up to her and called her my girlfriend, and she looked at me in disbelief and said, "You're dreaming!" I pulled out my phone and made a call. Ten minutes later, a tens of millions of Ferraris stopped beside us and I asked her if she would like to be my girlfriend? She shyly threw herself into my arms, husband, what girlfriend do you say, I am obviously your fiancée! At this time, the Ferrari driver said, can not go? Car rental is expensive! Alas, this driver is so mouthy, the beauty gave me a slap and flew away!

2. The first time the sister-in-law took her boyfriend home, the two broke up. The mother-in-law who loves money opened her mouth to give a dowry of 500,000 yuan, and the young man was really scared. Later, when the sister-in-law sent her boyfriend back, he said to the sister-in-law on the road: "After going back, tell your mother that ginseng and abalone cannot be eaten at the same time, sea cucumber and shark fin cannot be eaten at the same time, and prawns and crabs cannot be eaten at the same time!" The sister-in-law asked in a puzzled way: "I don't know how you said this, but what is the use of her disagreeing?" The young man gave a blank look and said, "Your family is so poor that at the same time it will die of poverty!" ”

3, the car opened by the company in recent years is Porsche, Ferrari and other cars, the weekend is not easy to rest on the feeling of taking a bus. Not long after getting into the car, an aunt with heavy makeup scolded and grinned and prepared to get on the car. The driver wasn't a good temper either, when the aunt hadn't gotten in the car yet. Shout: I am in a hurry to reincarnate, the goblin quickly flashed away, don't miss the good day of returning home! Then, driving away with a cigarette...

4. My cousin was sick and hospitalized, and the attending doctor was his ex-girlfriend. This was embarrassing, the cousin was about to leave, but was stopped and said: "You are in line, now it is you, come in!" After the cousin went in, he said embarrassedly: "Doctor, look at it, it is cured, please eat!" The ex-girlfriend smiled and said, "I want to solve it in one meal, it's cured, introduce me to a boyfriend!" ”"

5. I heard that my uncle's cousin drove Wuling to Qiuming Mountain to run the mountain and hit the tree, so let me go and see. The next day I came to my uncle's house with brain platinum and Wuliangye, and it was my 10-year-old cousin who opened the door, only to see him wearing a plaster cast in his left hand and a cigarette in his mouth. I asked him, "Is your dad home?" The cousin smiled and said, "Brother, look at me like this, will my father be at home?" ”

6. The daughter-in-law tries on the newly purchased clothes on the Internet and turns around in front of the mirror with great interest. "Oh, husband, I seem to be sick, I feel short of breath, and my eyes are black." "Wife, your illness is caused by external conditions and inability to adapt to internal changes. The daughter-in-law looked at me puzzled, "Say what, talk about people." ", did not expect the girl to jump over,"Ma Ma, Dad said that people fat clothes are small, Le'

7. The rich man bought a house for the second generation of the rich who had just graduated, and spent 8,600,000 yuan on Tomson Yipin. The people in their community are very magical, never take the access control card when they go out, and wait for the doorman to open. Yesterday, although he brought it, the second generation of the rich did not go to open the door, so he waited with them for half an hour. Finally, they finally waited for someone with an access card to open the door! The second generation of the rich has no other ideas, just want to teach these people a lesson: remember to bring the key when you go out!

8. When my cousin went to the market to buy vegetables, he looked at Wang Ba very fresh, and when he was going to fish, his finger was bitten down by Wang Ba, and the stall owner lost 300,000 yuan. After recovering from his injuries, my cousin was very happy and invited us to go to the hot pot restaurant. I took some beer, and a brother suddenly asked: Is there anyone who drinks white??? We all shook our heads, and he said, "Don't you all drink white??? Then I'll drink it. After we listened, we all silently cast admiring eyes. Then he said to the boss: Boss, bring me a bottle of nutrition express.........

9, quarrel with the female boss, I left in a huff, before leaving I said to her: "Even if you beg me, I will not come to work, I hate you!" The landlady sneered and ignored it, and at noon, she sent a circle of friends and said: "It's really happy to pay my salary today." I quickly took a taxi out of the house and rushed to the company to ask the finances: "What about my salary?" Why didn't it? "The finances are confused, the company can't open the pot, who pays wages." I ran to question the landlady, and she said that the circle of friends set me alone. I was about to leave again, and the landlady came over and took my hand and said, "Don't go, from today on, the company is in charge." "I threw away her hand and left in a huff, trying to throw this mess at me? Don't!?

10. Working in the workshop of GAC Group, there is a high temperature subsidy bonus of 1200 yuan this month. After paying my salary a few days ago, I hid the bonus of 1200 yuan of high temperature subsidy in the clothes I wore in winter, and wanted to buy a bottle of Moutai wine in a few days, so I added a note for insurance purposes and wrote: Save enough 1500 yuan to give to my wife. I took it out today and found that there were 300 more pieces, which became 1500 pieces.

11, I have a lot of relationship with the company's landlady, she accidentally became pregnant with my child. In order to stay with me, the landlady divorced her husband without hesitation, and then posted 800,000 yuan to marry me. The day after the wedding, I took her to the mall. I must be talkative and flirt with the shopping guide from time to time. It's not that I'm not afraid of my wife getting angry, but every time at this time, she will pull me away, and the clothes will not be bought...

#Funny Moment# #年度搞笑名场面 #