Since ancient times, no matter what kind of work or what kind of identity people pursue, what they pursue is nothing more than two words, that is, "happiness". Different people do not have exactly the same understanding of happiness. For example, people who are engaged in business hope that the source of wealth will be widespread and their business will get better and better every day; those who are officials in the DPRK hope to rise step by step; and those who read books hope that the title of the gold list will be titled. For ordinary people, what exactly is happiness?
In fact, happiness is very simple, the family is in good health, there is a fairly good job, the wife and children are hot, a few friends who can make friends, and that's it. The pursuit of happiness on the road, not all smooth, if you reach a certain age, but make a wrong decision, you will lose happiness, and even regret for life. The ancients had such a piece of advice
"Forty desires, the general trend has gone; fifty sentimentalities, chickens and dogs are restless." ”
What does it mean?
First, forty desires, the general trend has gone
Now middle-aged people around forty years old, the work is basically stable, all aspects of energy is also relatively strong, physical fitness is OK, so there is a "man forty-one flowers" saying. However, if placed in ancient times, forty years old is no longer young, or has begun to enter the twilight years, because the average life expectancy of the ancients is short, and it is normal to die at the age of fifty, which can be seen from the ancient saying "seventy ancient rarity".
Confucius once said, "Thirty and standing, forty not confused, fifty knowing the Destiny." There is a popular saying on the Internet: "Middle-aged people seem to be strong and are the pillar of the family, but the collapse is also in an instant." "To be fair, after people pass middle age, the responsibilities and burdens on their bodies are heavier, and there are elderly parents who need to be supported, and there are children who have not yet become independent, even if they have dreams, they dare not easily break in."
The "desire" in "forty desires" refers to desires, including desire for wealth, desire for fame and fortune, and desire for feelings. When you are young, there is almost no pressure, in a state where one person eats enough for the whole family without hunger, dare to fight and dare to break in, even if it fails, it does not have much impact, and there are many opportunities to start over.
Comparatively speaking, middle-aged people cannot be so dashing, because they carry responsibilities and have too many things to worry about and consider. If you pursue fame and fortune too much, pursue wealth too much, and pursue at all costs, once you fail, the consequences are unimaginable, it is possible to lose the family foundation accumulated for many years, the chance of making a comeback is very slim, and the family will also suffer, if it is serious, it will lead to the separation of wives and children.
When a person is over forty years old, he should understand which is more important than the other, and he is no longer a hot-blooded young man who carries a sword and walks to the end of the world. Looking at the friends around you who start a business, most of the young people in their twenties and thirties, and there are very few middle-aged people over the age of forty. Most people understand that stability is the most important thing, because they are at the age of "winning, not losing". From this point of view, the saying that "there are more than forty desires, and the general trend has gone" is quite reasonable.
Two, fifty sentimental, chickens and dogs restless
"Love" here has two meanings, one is the love of men and women, and the other is the feelings between relatives and friends. Why not be affectionate? And look at the first meaning, people around the age of fifty, generally married for more than twenty years, and husbands or wives hand in hand through the ups and downs, the original love has been sublimated into affection, mutual understanding, mutual tolerance, and slowly become old partners.
However, a small number of people feel that life is too plain and eager to pursue the so-called freshness, so they begin to become dishonest, and then they are unfaithful to marriage and betray their other half. Men or women, must be loyal to the marriage, if the couple really has no feelings, you can choose to separate, and then pursue happiness separately. Otherwise, the feelings outside the marriage are not right, do not move this thought, once discovered, it will be restless.
Looking at the second meaning, the exchanges between friends and relatives belong to the exchange of courtesy and courtesy, and it is also the common sentiment of people. But after the age of fifty, it is necessary to recognize which relationships can continue to be together and which relationships should be broken. Don't trust others too much, he is real you are real, he fakes you turn around. Some people, the friendship is too important, friends asked him to borrow money, without saying a word, he agreed, and finally the money lent out was recovered, making his family unhappy.
The things left by the ancients may not be correct, but they cannot be completely denied, just like the saying "forty desires, the general trend has gone; fifty sentimental, chickens and dogs are restless", although the times are changing, this sentence is still worth learning, what do you think?