Quanzhou Anshen Psychological Hospital: The reasons for children's nervousness and anxiety are very complicated. It may be genetic or it may be caused by the acquired environment.
Innate temperament works.
Many moms have had this experience. When their baby is 4 months old, they cry or be terrified when they see a stranger. When they're slightly older, some of them are still sensitive, lack self-confidence, have strong self-esteem, and are prone to being nervous and worrying too much. Some parents wonder that there is no difference between bringing their own children and bringing someone else's children. Why are children so "grinding"? Here, innate temperament does play a role.
environmental factors
Studies have shown that the role of environmental factors cannot be ignored. Most children with an anxious temperament, their parents are also prone to anxiety or impatience. It is not difficult to imagine that when things happen to children, the information received by parents who are often nervous is also confused and anxious. However, parents who are emotionally unstable and love to beat their children will lack enough security and stability when their children are ignored, beaten, and denied for a long time.
Parents are too demanding.
The more common anxiety now is the pressure that parents bring to their children through advanced education - other children can't do it, their own children can do it, other children can do it, and children should be more proficient. Because of the high standard of "not losing at the starting line", it is difficult for children's performance to satisfy and approve of parents, so they ask children to do better again and again. Over time, children will lose self-confidence and feel restless because they cannot achieve their expected goals. If parents are accompanied by intimidating or harsh punishment, children become more nervous when doing something.
Overprotective and coddled
Excessive protection and coddling of children, resulting in their lack of independent development, is also the cause of children's anxiety. Take Xiaoyu as an example. Since she was a child, she has been loved by her family as a "little princess". She was hardly treated unfairly. Even kindergarten was where her aunt worked. A year ago, my aunt and husband went abroad to settle down. Xiaoyu didn't want to go to kindergarten for a while, but then she reluctantly went and began to bite her nails. Over-arrangement by family members often deprives children of opportunities to exercise their social skills. When they are alone in a new environment, in a new situation, or in contact with strangers, they become confused about how to deal with it, resulting in mood swings and excessive worry.
The relationship between parents is not harmonious
There are also many children's anxieties that allude to discord between parents. For example, the parents' marital relationship has a rift, unwilling to face it themselves, but by raising the requirements for the child to make up for the defects in the marriage; at this time, the child will subconsciously cooperate with the parents, show some symptoms of anxiety, transfer the contradictions in the family to themselves, and be willing to be the "scapegoat", thus avoiding the rupture of the parental relationship.