Hello everyone.
In order to increase the readability of the account, Saturdays, Sundays, and holidays are not changed, and the study notes are adjusted to be published. (Notes are excerpts and do not represent personal views)
1. The source of the pain of raising children
In raising children, I found that the root cause of everyone's pain is that they spend too much money and apply for too many classes.
Each one has just gained a foothold in the big city, and as a result, the cultivation of children is similar to the cultivation of nobles:
Speaking classes, dance classes, piano classes, Chinese studies classes, broadcast acting classes, taekwondo, programming, and what robots, some have to ride horses every month, and four-year-olds are busier than adults.
My point is that the premise of cultivating interest is that you will let him do it for a long time.
There are some things that you can't insist on offering for twenty or thirty years, then basically it is of no great use, and if you really cultivate interest, you may not be able to provide for it.
This does not include the various cultural classes after attending elementary school.
I actually don't understand, what has been said in class, spend thousands to find a college student who costs 60 yuan per lesson to tell you again, I always feel that it is not a little redundant.
But there seems to be no way, because everyone is making up, and you have no sense of security if you don't make up.
Some time ago, I said that I would not let make up the class, and the parents applauded it, which means that everyone knows that the make-up class is useless, but the inertia is rolled out, and others are doing what you do, and it is easy to be anxious.
And one child is so much money, you have two more, this money is X3, but when your salary can go up threefold is a problem.
It is very painful for a family to not be able to save money, and there are constant hidden dangers, which I think is one of the reasons why people don't want to live.
2. The rules of telling stories to children
Summarize some of the rules for telling stories to children (especially small children):
In a story, there can be no more than three main names and place names.
New terms appear to be explained, not thrown hard, even if it is a rough explanation.
That is to say, replace it with a classification name of the next higher level, such as "and state stabbed Shi Dong Zhuo", to say "the governor of this place of hezhou is called Dong Zhuo".
To let people know that the state is a "place", and the thorn history is a "chief".
If there are three things in the story, you must use 70% of the space to tell one thing, and 30% to tell two things.
Before telling a thing, there must be a question, either through the characters in the story to ask questions, or ask their own questions.
The story logic must be single, one reason pushes out a result, and many reasons cannot cause a result.
If it is true that many causes have contributed to a result, the primary must be highlighted and the secondary must be omitted.
The ending of the story cannot be open, if there is a conclusion, it should be given directly, and the evaluation of the characters should be clear.
There can be no such ending as "Hu Fei's knife is cut or not", let alone "how this person evaluates the academic circles are still discussing".
Unless the purpose is for the children to discuss.
The most widely and universally accepted terms should be used.
If a statement is self-contained, don't mention it, if you have to, it is better to be old than new.
Just like children's food, it is better to be tasteless than irritating.
If you make a statement clear, you must also introduce the interpretation and redefinition of many premises and concepts, even if there is academic value, you must avoid it.
3, parents do not go to "accept the child's ordinary"
Parents should not "accept the child's ordinariness", just accept your own ordinariness as a parent.
Children are unknown, ordinary or extraordinary is not something you can decide and anticipate right now.
The future is left to the future, and you only need to be a normal parent for the moment.
Normal parents are in awe of an independent life.
Never be on top in front of the child, just easily and simply love the child, do three meals a day, talk happily with the child for a little while every day, focus on doing your own thing, and pay attention to how you do as an example.
Children will not grow up in the direction expected by their parents, but will only grow up in the way their parents are.
I think of a passage:
In the beginning, each child felt particularly different in the eyes of their parents:
The heavenly court is full of square corners, and the earlobes are thick and blessed, either under the Ziwei Star or the Wenqu Star.
More than 10 years later,, how did I give birth to such a thing...
4. The root cause of mediocrity:
The vast majority of us mortals, lamenting alone that we are not talented, not creating enough, or something, are actually illusions.
The problem boils down to nothing more than:
One is lazy, two is delayed, and three are unwilling to read.
So much for.
—— Zhang Jiawei, "Masterpieces and Masterpieces"
5) There are two things we should try to do as little as possible
One is to interfere with the lives of others with your own mouth;
The second is to rely on other people's brains to think about their own lives.
—Jack Fox