Zhengzhou Traditional Chinese Medical Hall: On the road of children's growth, IQ only plays an influential role of about 20%, and the remaining 80% is determined by emotional intelligence. Moreover, compared with IQ, a large part of IQ is determined by genes, and the acquired "appreciation potential" is average; on the other hand, emotional intelligence is basically cultivated.
Eight of the most important emotional intelligence factors in a child's development:
1. Independence
Includes independent consciousness and independent behavior, that is:
1. Children should be able to think independently about some problems and make their own decisions;
2. Children can take care of their own housework and take care of their own lives.
Second, empathy
Empathy can be simply understood as "empathy." Empathy plays an extremely important role in interpersonal communication. The cultivation of children's empathy is a gradual process, and mothers can try this method: whenever you feel that your child is a little selfish, first stabilize the conversation atmosphere, let the child express his thoughts freely, then crouch down, seriously and calmly express his thoughts, and finally let the child respond to your thoughts: "You listened to your mother's words, what do you think should be done next?"
Third, self-confidence
Self-confidence consists of two parts: an external sense of identity and a sense of accomplishment, both of which are indispensable. The child has done something very proud, but when parents and teachers deny it, the child will certainly not have confidence. Sometimes children, although encouraged by their parents and teachers, have some doubts or dislikes about their abilities, so they will not have confidence.
4. Responsibility
Responsibility is a child's correct understanding of the norms and obligations that they should follow. An irresponsible child, accustomed to being self-centered, doesn't get along well with his peers, and doesn't have stable relationships. It is precisely because of the lack of responsibility that children often lack the motivation to struggle.
5. Self-discipline
Self-discipline is the ability to resist external temptations and self-discipline. An indisciplined child doesn't know what he should or shouldn't do. He often wastes a lot of time on some entertainment and pastimes, and it is easy to achieve nothing. To improve children's self-discipline ability, only by reminding and reprimanding is ineffective. It must be combined with "reasonable goals, a sense of accomplishment, and interest."
Sixth, the ability of the verb to resist setbacks
The ability to resist setbacks can also be seen as a self-protection ability that prevents children from having abnormal mental and physical reactions when they are hit by failure.
7. Time management capabilities
Time management ability, which means efficiency, is the basic skill of study and work, and it is also the basic skill of life. Homework is probably the best manifestation of this ability. The same class, the same homework, there are always some kids to write until midnight. In the end, the child is too tired, and the parents complain that the teacher has assigned too much homework.
8. Emotional management skills
Emotion management focuses more on the ability to deal with negative emotions. What kind of personality, interpersonal relationships, and social adaptability a child will eventually develop are all related to this.