#山哥情感观点系列 #
(Shan Ge talks about emotions, picture from the Internet)
| Wen/Pang Fengshan
01
Zhu Deyong, a famous Taiwanese cartoonist, said:
The difficulty of love is the moonlight is poetry, it is three hundred and sixty-five thousand roses, plus eternity; the difficult marriage, the account book is the certificate, it is thirty-six thousand and five thousand quarrels, plus patience; the difficult life, is neither of the above.
For this reason, for feelings, two people together, it is impossible without friction and quarrels.
To a large extent, husband and wife are interdependent, that is, playing pots and pans symphonies together. Therefore, it is inevitable that there will be times when the tongue touches the teeth, and there will be times when the spoon touches the edge of the pot.
Whether it is a quarrel between husband and wife, a contradiction or even a cold war with each other, this is a normal state of life and marriage, can not be avoided, there is no need to avoid, just face it calmly.
Just as the so-called husband and wife quarrel do not remember revenge, the bedside quarrel after the end of the bed and.
Whether it is hot or cold, in general, two people quarreling has become a way of communication for many people.
In real life, some couples may feel uncomfortable if they don't argue every other time, and they will feel that something is wrong with their marriage.
In fact, this is not a pretense, nor is it abnormal, but they have indeed taken each other's quarrels as a habit, and only in the quarrels can we find the real feeling of the husband and wife living, otherwise they may feel panicked and feel weak.
Of course, husband and wife quarrel is definitely an art, but also need to grasp the scale and scale, which is why some couples are suitable for quarrelling, how to quarrel is not scattered, and some partners never quarrel, the result of quarreling once is divided.
Two people together, not afraid of quarreling and not afraid of having nothing to say, afraid of not being able to do the following with each other.
02
Emotional mentor Tu Lei said:
Many people ruin their happiness because of an illusion, and there has never been an easy and successful love, from the beginning of nothing to talk about, to the end of nothing to say, this is the journey that love must go through.
All the best happiness must be bloody and run-in to be able to blend to the end, but many loves stop here.
You think you've come to an end, so you've found a listener, and you've talked a lot, and you think you've found a confidant, but that's just the novelty of strangeness. You think you've found true love again, but chances are, you've missed someone who truly loves you.
Good emotional relationship, not afraid of noise, not afraid of nothing to say, but no matter how noisy, how to make trouble, in the end, no one can do without whom.
Two people together, if you can't do how to argue, how to make trouble, each other can not be separated from each other, then advise you not to argue easily, because it is easy to quarrel with each other's feelings.
Feelings are like this, from the initial freshness, to each other's blandness, this is a natural process, next, in the trivial chai rice oil and salt of life, it is inevitable to undergo the baptism of life, to face the test of reality, to feel the friction and collision of each other.
In such a process, as long as two people have feelings, love, and the responsibility they shoulder, then, no matter how noisy they argue with each other, how they make trouble, in the end, I am afraid that no one can still be separated from anyone.
Those who finally choose to leave you are not because of how many quarrels you have had between you, nor how many cold wars you have endured, but just because they have always wanted to leave you, but have not yet found a better time, or a more convincing reason.
More often, two people originally have no love, no feelings, and no so-called sense of responsibility, just use each other, each taking what they need, so it is sooner or later to break up.
03
I have a relative, she and her husband have lived together for many years, they have two babies with each other, they from before marriage to after marriage, more than ten years of conjugal life, always accompanied by noise and bumps.
She and her husband often quarrel over a small matter, and when the quarrel is fierce, they will even move their hands, which has happened more than once.
They quarrel really fiercely, very scary kind, absolutely let you feel what is called heart pounding.
However, over the years, they can actually live together very well.
In fact, she and her husband quarreled, quarreled, the Cold War returned to the Cold War, they could pull down in the past, emotions came and went quickly, and after the quarrel, they were like no one else.
For this, it may be difficult for some couples to do this.
Therefore, not all couples are suitable for quarrels and cold wars, some couples may quarrel, how to fight and how to make trouble does not matter, and some couples, maybe two people as long as they quarrel once may be abolished.
It needs to vary from person to person, two people living together, and deep down, each of us doesn't want to always argue with each other, always fight, always have a cold war.
However, this is not something we can control ourselves, marriage is a matter of two people, and it requires mutual achievement and fulfillment of two people.
Since the quarrel between husband and wife may be difficult to avoid, then we can only control the contradiction between husband and wife to a minimum, try not to complicate and aggravate each other's contradictions, try to do how to quarrel and how to make trouble, after the quarrel is still two people who love each other.
I believe that as long as two people care about each other and love each other, never forget their original intentions to adhere to each other's feelings and marriage, no matter how noisy and noisy because of some things, they will do not be able to do without whom, so that every quarrel with the bottom line becomes a catalyst for feelings, rather than a destructive agent.
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