In fact, many things in the literary and artistic circle originally had no beauty to speak of, but they were passed down by people, and they were beautiful for some reason.
Lu Xiaoman, because of his marriage with Xu Zhimo, became a famous figure in modern times. Today, people say that she is a painter, well versed in Kunqu opera, can also play Pi Huang, write a good article, has a deep foundation in ancient literature and a solid ability to modify words, but all of these are not as famous as her marriage and love with Xu Zhimo.
We don't want to write this emotion complex and touching, because it is often the imagination of the writer, and life often needs people to get its most authentic side. Authenticity, honesty and beauty, is the flame of life perception. It shines brightly, and for those who read it, it is a kindness from the heart that does not need to be whitewashed, and can then be transformed into a kind of power in the future. It doesn't take much sacredness, just an effort to restore.
In 1903, Lu Xiaoman was born in Kongjia Lane, Shanghai. His family moved to Shanghai to avoid the war in the "Taiping Heavenly Kingdom". Lu Xiaoman's father was named Lu Ding, his original name was Lu Zifu, the word Housheng, because he was smart when he was young, and he had to pass every exam, so the elders changed his name to Lu Ding for him. Rikuding was a native of the late Qing Dynasty, graduated from Waseda University in Japan, and was a proud disciple of the famous Japanese minister Itō Hirobumi. During this time, Lu Ding participated in dr. Sun Yat-sen's alliance meeting. After returning to China, he served in the Kuomintang government, successively serving as director, counselor, taxation director and other important positions, and also founded the China Savings Bank. The Lu family was rich and was a famous and prestigious family in Changzhou, Jiangsu at that time.
Lu Xiaoman's name was Wu Manhua, and his great-grandfather was wu Guangyue Jinshi, who had served as an official in Zhejiang, Guangdong, Henan, Hebei and other places, and was appointed as the governor of Jiangxi in 1829, and was deeply trusted by the Daoguang Emperor. With this family background, Wu Manhua has received a good education since childhood, is versatile, especially good at poetry and painting, and is a famous girl in the Republic of China period.
After Lu Ding and Wu Manhua got married, it is said that they had 8 children successively, but they all died prematurely, and finally only Lu Xiaoman was left with this single seedling. Therefore, Lu Ding and Wu Manhua attach great importance to the cultivation of Lu Xiaoman, bent on "building" her into a famous door, in addition to the mother's ear and eyes, personally adjusted, after Lu Xiaoman enrolled, her father also specially invited a foreign English teacher for her. Growing up in such a family environment, Lu Xiaoman was proficient in all kinds of paintings and calligraphy, especially with literary and artistic temperament, and also developed a willful, enjoyable and demanding personality.
In 1909, Lu Xiaoman went to Beijing with his mother to live according to his father. In 1910, she studied at the Elementary School Affiliated to Beijing Women's Normal University. In 1918, he entered the Sacred Heart Academy in Beijing. In 1920, he was hired by Gu Weijun, the chief foreign minister of the Beiyang government, as a diplomatic translator, and gradually became famous in Beijing's social circles. Fame has also reached the age of marriage. In 1922, Lu Xiaoman left the Sacred Heart Academy and married Wang Geng. This year, Lu Xiaoman was 19 years old.
Wang Geng is a native of Wuxi, 8 years older than Lu Xiaoman, originally the son of an official eunuch, angry after the decline of his family, graduated from Tsinghua University, studied in the United States, entered the University of Michigan, Columbia University, Princeton University, and later entered the West Point Military Academy, graduated in 1918 and returned to China, serving in the War Department of the Beijing government. Lu Xiaoman's family was able to choose such a husband for Lu Xiaoman, mainly because of Wang Geng's spirit of hard study and his future future, and in fact, in the second year of marriage to Lu Xiaoman, Wang Geng was appointed deputy commander of the Escort Road Army of the Ministry of Communications and promoted to major general of the army.
From the perspective of material conditions, Lu Xiaoman became Wang Geng's wife of course to live a rich life, but material enjoyment can not make her really happy, Wang Geng is a person who is bent on the career, will not give Lu Xiaoman too many flowers between men and women before the moon and the moon Qingqing my romance and entanglement. This made Lu Xiaoman somewhat psychologically lost. In the third year of marriage, Wang Geng was appointed as the chief of the Harbin police, and Lu Xiaoman went with him, but the Harbin climate made Lu Xiaoman very uncomfortable, and it did not take long for her to return to Beijing alone and separate from Wang Geng.
In 1924, Lu Xiaoman starred in "Chunxiang Noisy School" and became acquainted with Xu Zhimo. The enthusiastic Xu Zhimo suddenly aroused a certain need in Lu Xiaoman's heart, but as a married woman, she still had some scruples at the beginning, thinking that it was not the right time for her and Xu Zhimo to meet, and Wang Geng, as a husband, did not find that there was already a crisis in her marriage at this time. Lu Xiaoman wanted him to play with himself, he always had no time to shirk, after Xu Zhimo appeared, he simply handed over this "errand", when Lu Xiaoman needed to have fun, he would always let Lu Xiaoman go to Xu Zhimo. This made Lu Xiaoman and Xu Zhimo together a natural thing, and soon there were feelings, becoming an encounter of dry firewood.
Xu Zhimo
Xu Zhimo's statement at that time was that there would be a vigorous marriage revolution, and it would not matter if the whole world was lost. In front of him, Wang Geng became a tasteless person in Lu Xiaoman's heart, so from an emotional point of view, Lu Xiaoman began to alienate Wang Geng and quickly burned into a mess with Xu Zhimo. Because of this, it became inevitable that Lu Xiaoman and Wang Geng would quarrel and quarrel, which in turn made Wang Geng insult Lu Xiaoman in public and not give Lu Xiaoman a good look. Lu Xiaoman has been regarded as a pearl in the palm of his hand by his parents since he was a child, who can withstand this kind of anger. After being scolded, she returned to her mother's house and vowed not to return to the Wang family. What's more fatal is that Lu Ding and Wu Manhua also feel that their daughter should not be wronged in this way, and they stand on their daughter's side and support their daughter's actions. Eventually, Lu Xiaoman divorced Wang Geng in 1925.
Parents' attitude towards their children's married life will also lead to the success or failure of their children's marriages, and Lu Xiaoman has been pampered by her parents as a divorced woman. This year, Lu Xiaoman was 23 years old, and she had entered a hot love affair with Xu Zhimo before the divorce. In many articles of today's people, Xu Zhimo at this time is written as a poor student, in fact, this is not the case, Xu Zhimo stayed in the ocean, has a deep family background, and his father Xu Shenru was a famous industrialist at that time. The reason why he said that he was poor was because he divorced his ex-wife Zhang Youyi and was cut off by his father, and he could no longer easily get money from the family.
Xu Shenru did this for two reasons: First, Xu Zhimo and Zhang Youyi's marriage was arranged by him, he liked Zhang Youyi very much, after Xu Zhimo and Zhang Youyi divorced, Xu Shenru accepted Zhang Youyi as a "righteous daughter"; second, although Xu Zhimo did not love Zhang Youyi, he let Zhang Youyi give birth to two children for himself.
Lu Xiaoman's divorce made her xu Zhimo's wife, but this kind of thing Xu Zhimo could not fail to ask his father, Xu Shenru was very angry about this, because his son's divorce from Zhang Youyi was already a big rebellion in his opinion, and after this, the son had to marry a married woman, and Xu Shenru's old bones were angry. But when he encounters such a thing, what can he do? Xu Zhimo asked his friend Hu Shi and others to intercede for himself in front of Xu Shenru, and Xu Shenru saw that he was irretrievable, so he put forward the following three conditions:
1. The marriage costs are at their own expense, and they must obtain Zhang Youyi's permission; 2. The wedding must be introduced by Hu Shi and witnessed by Liang Qichao, otherwise it will not be recognized; 3. After marriage, they must return to Shanghai in the south, and the two must live in peace and keep to themselves.
For Xu Zhimo, these three conditions are not a problem, the marriage fee is not a problem, Zhang Youyi has a "dead heart" to him, "permission" is just a form; Hu Shi is his friend, Liang Qichao is his teacher, let them be an introducer and witness will not make much effort; returning to Shanghai and finding a job there, living with peace of mind, is also not a problem. Besides, isn't this what he vigorously fell in love with Lu Xiaoman? However, in 1926, when Xu Zhimo and Lu Xiaoman were married in Beihai Park in Beijing, there was an embarrassing scene that Xu Zhimo and Lu Xiaoman did not expect.
Liang Qichao
The person who created the embarrassing scene was no one else, but Liang Qichao, as a witness to the marriage, he issued a very famous "marriage testimony" to Xu Zhimo and Lu Xiaoman, which was very famous in later generations, with the following meaning:
These few words I say are not very good, but I am so that there will be no more things like this in this society in the future, and people cannot marry like this, let alone do this. Xu Zhimo this person is impetuous, did not do learning, not to say, to be a failure, divorce and remarriage is the proof of his inattentiveness! Lu Xiaoman, you are also a divorced person, and I hope that from now on you will abide by the way of women and review your personality and behavior. What I want to say is that divorce and remarriage are all caused by the shortcomings and faults in your and Xu Zhimo's personality, I hope that you will not be wrong again and again, and you will be wrong because of this mistake to hinder others; do not take selfishness as the criterion for acting, do not take absurdity and pleasure as the purpose of life pursuit, and stop treating marriage as a child's play, thinking that you can get married if you are happy, and divorcing if you are unhappy! If this is the case, you will make your parents ashamed, you will make your disdain, and you will let society see you as a joke! I hope this is the last time you two get married in your lifetime! This is my most sincere congratulations to you! That's all I have to say, that's it!
Today, some people say that this "marriage testimony" that is close to reprimand reflects Liang Qichao's concern and love for his student Xu Zhimo as a teacher, which can be described as ancient and modern, but some people also say that Liang Qichao is selfish in doing so, and the so-called selfish heart is that Xu Zhimo is also pursuing his daughter-in-law Lin Huiyin, who has not passed through the door, while fighting with Lu Xiaoman. What we want to say is that whether it is "fighting" or not, liang Qichao's words are bitter and heartfelt words for those who take marriage as a child's play, and they are all a warning, although the occasion of the new marriage is somewhat unlucky, but it is better than nothing.
Lu Xiaoman and Xu Zhimo in the first days after marriage, the two lives were comfortable and romantic, but the time was not long, Lu Xiaoman suffered from severe asthma and stomach disease, in order to see her, Xu Zhimo visited famous doctors, and finally found Weng Ruiwu. Weng Ruiwu was born in 1899 in Wujiang, Jiangsu Province, similar in age to Lu Xiaoman and Xu Zhimo, the son of Weng Shouqi, is a big player, loves antique collection, is good at calligraphy and painting poetry, can also sing Beijing opera Kunqu opera, and also Chinese medicine Tuina.
Weng Rui noon
When Lu Xiaoman's illness occurred, he cried and rushed to the ground, and Weng Ruiwu came to Xu Mansion to massage Lu Xiaoman. Lu Xiaoman's illness eased as a result, and he always became pleasant, gentle and kind after Weng Ruiwu's massage. Because of this, between Weng Ruiwu and Lu Xiaoman, there are often opportunities for luo shu and clever hand caressing, and there are also some gossip from the outside world, for which Weng Ruiwu is very reasonable: "It was Shima who invited me to come here!" Xu Zhimo did not care much about this, and did not oppose his wife making friends, after several illnesses, the three of them became good friends, and because they had a common love of opera, they also went out to play together. However, the Xu family has always been reluctant to accept Lu Xiaoman, in their view, Lu Xiaoman is a woman who will not live a life, and Xu Zhimo married her very hard.
The fact is also that Lu Xiaoman spends a lot of money at home, has cars in and out, and hires many servants. She likes to buy casually and never asks what the price is. There is even a nurse at home who serves her specifically, because she does not drink milk and believes that the nutritional value of human milk is far higher than that of milk. In addition, she also smoked opium, which caused constipation and consumed honey. At that time, honey was very expensive, and there was always a lot of honey in her house, and she even used tender tofu and egg white makeup to make herself "look very gentle". Due to the erosion of opium and many other reasons, she became more and more delicate, lazy, and playful, and soon after marriage, she lost the passion she had when she was in love, and seemed to be no longer a spiritual woman. In order to please her, Xu Zhimo always blindly created her, running between Beijing and Shanghai, desperately earning money to support his family, which also caused the Xu family to be strongly dissatisfied with Lu Xiaoman.
In 1931, Xu Shenru's wife Qian Muying was critically ill, and Xu Shenru urgently recalled Xu Zhimo to Jiaoshi. Xu Zhimo originally wanted Lu Xiaoman to serve his mother-in-law, but xu Shenru was fiercely opposed. After Qian Muying's death, Lu Xiaoman rushed to the Xu family wearing a filial piety suit, but was blocked by Xu Shenru's people in the middle of the road and failed to enter the house. Xu Zhimo felt that his father had gone too far in doing so, and he bumped into his father, and the father and son turned against each other from then on.
In 1931, Xu Zhimo returned to Beiping via Nanjing and rushed to attend Lin Huiyin's lecture, and the plane crashed and was killed. Xu Shenru was in tears, and in addition to his grief, he thought that Lu Xiaoman was an ominous woman, it was Lu Xiaoman who killed his son, if it were not for Lu Xiaoman's money, Xu Zhimo would not have worked part-time to maintain his livelihood, and such a tragedy would not have happened at all. For this reason, Xu Zhimo's memorial service Lu Xiaoman also failed to attend. What is happy is that, fortunately, Xu Zhimo had a sincere conversation with Weng Ruiwu before the accident, hoping that Weng Ruiwu could take good care of Lu Xiaoman for himself, and Weng Ruiwu fulfilled his promise after Xu Zhimo's death.
Xu Shenru
After Xu Zhimo's death, Lu Xiaoman no longer went out to socialize, and silently endured criticism and accusations from the outside world. Her body was the same as before, and the old disease often recurred, and Weng Ruiwu's massage of her was still the same. It is said that after one massage, Lu Xiaoman suddenly asked Weng Ruiwu: "I can't do without you for this disease, if one day I get sick, what will you do?" Weng Ruiwu thought for a while and told Lu Xiaoman a good way, that is, smoking opium, Lu Xiaoman obviously knew that this was a bad habit, but together with Weng Ruiwu and the two of them swallowed clouds and vomited on the living room smoke bed. In order to anesthetize herself, she even sat in the classroom for smoking opium.
Perhaps it was the beginning of swallowing clouds and spitting fog with Weng Ruiwu, Lu Xiaoman and Weng Ruiwu began to live together, and Weng Ruiwu took over all her expenses in addition to supplying her with opium. The harm to Weng Ruiwu's wife is obvious, Weng Ruiwu's wife is called Chen Mingliu, and Weng Ruiwu has 5 children, Weng Ruiwu did not abandon Chen Mingliu, but took a two-end approach to care between Chen Mingliu and Lu Xiaoman, but the money is always limited, and spending it on Lu Xiaoman's side is equivalent to less Chen Mingliu's side, so Chen Mingliu and his 5 children suffered a lot because of Lu Xiaoman's appearance.
In 1952, Chen Mingliu, who was only 52 years old, died of illness. Weng Ruiwu's daughter Weng Xiangguang, thinking of her father's indebtedness to her mother for Lu Xiaoman's sake, rushed into Lu Xiaoman's house and yelled at her father there: "Why do you want to do this to your mother?" Don't divorce your mom early so that mom can find a good person and live a few years of comfortable life!" After saying that, he said to Lu Xiaoman with tears: "Why did you grab my father and hold on?" It is said that Weng Ruiwu and Lu Xiaoman listened to Weng Xiangguang's rebuke and both shed tears in silence. People can't tell if their tears are helplessness or remorse, or both.
In 1960, Weng Ruiwu died, when Lu Xiaoman was not yet 60 years old, but he had lost only his skin and bones, and even his teeth were missing, like a person in his 80s or even older. To this end, she once wrote such a poem: "Over the years, I have been more aware of the wilderness and the cold, and the mountains are always lonely." What people did not expect was that it was Weng Xiangguang, who questioned her, who saw that she was living a pitiful life alone and took on the obligation to take care of her. On April 3, 1965, Lu Xiaoman died in Shanghai Huadong Hospital. People see from the archives that Lu Xiaoman filled in the form he filled out in 1959 and filled in Weng Ruiwu in the "Family Personnel Situation" column. Obviously, Lu Xiaoman regarded Weng Ruiwu as his family member at least then, and also clearly showed her last heart.
Lu Xiaoman in his later years
At this time, Lu Xiaoman was already far from the so-called literature and art, and looking back on her life, it was really not so beautiful, and it was not difficult for people to find a word for her - pet, and perhaps it was this word that destroyed her. As for the "Weng RuiWu" she filled in in the "Family Situation" column, in addition to eating opium with her, in the days of her company, she was exhausted of lead and flowers, but Weng Ruiwu still did not abandon her, which was her luck. And her heart is only a person who can live a good life with her, but she is too late by the "pet" who used to be.
The pictures in this article are from the network, thanks to the original author!