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None of us are perfect parents, but we can be infinitely close to perfect growth parents.
Knowing the hot topic "What is the thing that your parents hurt you the most?" There are nearly 20,000 answers below.
One of the answers lists the "mistakes" that almost all Chinese parents have made:
What has been said does not count, always forgetting to promise the child;
Like to use vicious language to scold their children, threaten at every turn;
Double standard, always only speak their own truth;
Likes to snoop on children's privacy, stubborn and biased;
Do whatever you want, use your child as a pump...
There is no parent who does not love their children, but some parents turn love into harm because of the distorted concept of love, the lack of ability to love, and the wrong way of love.
There is a sentence in the CCTV family education documentary "Mirror":
"Every child is born with a blank piece of paper, and the parents are the ones who paint. What kind of white paper becomes, the key lies in the parents. ”
Therefore, what kind of person you want your child to become, you must first become what kind of person.
Growing parents are a blessing in a child's life.
Those who were raised with gentleness, regardless of their personal achievements, will always have an irresistible sunshine, self-confidence and natural self-esteem.
We want to cultivate children with growth thinking, parents should first lead by example, let themselves change their thinking patterns and the way they look at their children, and constantly accompany their children to practice growth thinking.
01
Allow children to make mistakes
Accept your child's imperfections
"Making mistakes" is not a bad thing for children.
What parents need to do is to help their children learn from every mistake.
This is the key to helping children have a growth mindset.
Zhu Yongxin said in "Let Children Create Themselves":
Growing up is a "trial and error" process.
A child's mind is like a young sprout, easily hurt.
If you say a wrong word or do a wrong thing, you will be severely criticized by your parents, and you will never dare to say or do it again, which will hinder the growth of your children.
Ying Cai'er has done a good job in this regard, and she has recently been frequently searched for with her "textbook" education method.
In the variety show "New Life Diary 2", Jasper borrowed the camera of the program group to shoot "The Flash", because her mother did not buy the right costumes, and gambled to delete all the videos in the camera.
She criticized Jasper, while also giving him enough time to digest his emotions.
Jasper and the director team then admitted their mistakes and apologized to each shot.
Ying Caier said:
I think stress resistance is important.
This thing may not destroy you, but you destroy yourself first.
Problems need to be learned to deal with on their own.
If the child makes a mistake, completely deny him, or even personally attack him, not only can not help the child to actively improve himself;
It will also make him feel self-denial of "I can't do it" and even give up any more attempts.
Respond positively and things will go in a good direction.
Often practice the "I can correct" thinking model with the child, the child's attitude towards making mistakes will become more and more positive, and form a positive way of thinking, and can also learn from the mistakes.
02
Don't label your child
Guide your child to positive expression
03
Learn to control emotions
Really do not yell at children
04
Be a growing parent
Guide children to explore and learn actively
05
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The most beautiful education is on the way...