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Psychoanalytic psychologist Eriksen proposes that everyone in the process of growth is in accordance with the maturity of the stage, whether it is physiological, biological, social or event, these 4 areas will be reflected.
In addition, the psychologist also proposed the theory of 8 stages of individual personality development in his book, and formed a unique set of ideas for the development characteristics of each stage.
Adulthood belongs to the 7th stage, which ranges from 25 to 30 years old, and the development tasks of this stage include obtaining a sense of reproduction, avoiding stagnation, feeling cared for, and so on.
Men and women of this age have already started a family and have their own babies, and most of them are focused on raising the next generation, of course, the reproductive ability mentioned here does not refer to a person's fertility, which also includes the responsibility of caring for and educating children.
Even if an individual does not have children, she will develop a corresponding sense of reproduction at this age, thus giving birth to a sense of love and concern for the next generation. The psychological characteristics of the middle of adulthood are not only a sense of reproduction, but also more concerned about the development of society and the psychological needs of people.
If a woman in her 50s does not have a sense of reproduction, then she will replace the inner needs with the illusion of false intimacy, so that she will close herself into a person's world, because she only focuses on herself, resulting in stagnation.
Most women in their 50s will experience marriage and family, for women at this stage, romantic love is obviously not what they most urgently desire, only stability and care are the root of marital happiness.
It is difficult for people to go smoothly, and so is marriage, some women have been hurt a lot in marriage, so they have learned to be strong and independent early, no longer like when they were girls, they have a beautiful vision for everything, and they will not rely on men with one mind, because they know that only when they have great strength, they can unswervingly go on.
Such women are active and economically independent, they often have achievements in their careers, and it is precisely because they are enterprising enough that such people are becoming more and more powerful and look more indestructible.
But in fact, everyone needs care and love, and women in their 50s who are still working are still like this, and their hearts are very eager for the stability and harmony brought by their families.
At this time, if women want to find another half, they will never start from the perspective of romance and passion of love, and everyone hopes to live a stable life, which in turn will bring a full sense of security.
Not only that, from the perspective of family stability, women will never accept long-distance love, if the two people's hometowns are far apart, then the risk of quarrels in the future will be greatly increased, such as who to go to during the New Year's Festival, where to settle after forming a family, whether to adapt to the strange atmosphere, etc., these are the problems that women have to consider.
Whether women are young or in the middle of adulthood, they all want their other half to take care of themselves.
By the age of 50, women have reached the realm of open-mindedness, they do not care about the rich and noble, if the other half respects her and loves her, then such a life is enough to be called happy.
A stable life is indispensable to the economic foundation, although it does not require great wealth and nobility, but women want men to have a stable economic income.
Men certainly have the right to pursue their dreams, but they also have to consider whether changing jobs will have an impact on the family, if a man's work is very mobile, then their residence will often change with the start and end of the project, for women, such a life is obviously not stable enough.
Stable families must also have a harmonious atmosphere.
Some families have too many brothers and sisters, everyone often maintains only superficial harmony, behind the scenes, always cheating on each other, calculating with each other, and such a family combination will inevitably bring a lot of trouble, so 50-year-old women prefer men with harmonious families.
From the perspective of care, the charm of young men to attract women may come from the sense of humor and gentle character, but the attraction of older men to women comes from the silent care and care of moisturizers.
Imagine how it would not be heartwarming for you to come home tired from work and find that your husband had already prepared a meal waiting for you?
It is undeniable that young men have a dynamic personality and handsome appearance, but for women around 50 years old, they have experienced great winds and waves, gained more life experience, the skin bag is no longer the primary condition for choosing a mate, they are more inclined to choose mature and stable men.
- The End -
Author | Tommy
Edit | Rain
The First Psychological Writing Group | A group of young people who like to look up at the stars
参考资料：Bruk, A., Scholl, S. G., & Bless, H. (2018). Beautiful mess effect: Self–other differences in evaluation of showing vulnerability. Journal of personality and social psychology, 115(2), 192-205