"Never break four things in your life: trust, relationship, promise and heart, because when they are broken, they don't make any noise, but they are extremely painful,"
Especially when dealing with friends of the opposite sex who are deeply related, we need to maintain a kind of boundary. Know that your relationship is a friend, so be sure to understand the importance of boundaries.
If in our relationship, the boundaries between friendship and love are blurred, and the feeling of getting along is shielded, then it will not only make others misunderstand, but also hurt the people around us.
After all, your relationship is just a deep friend, he is not your family member or your lover. Then the relationship between you needs to be clearly defined.
Therefore, it is necessary to grasp the boundaries in words and deeds, and once this boundary is exceeded, then the relationship has actually become sour. Of course, in the case that you are still single to each other, the upgrade from friendship to love is actually worth blessing.
However, if your relationship has always been a friendly relationship, and one of them already has a boyfriend or girlfriend. Then no matter how good and deep the relationship is, it cannot be too intimate.
It's like if you have a particularly close friend of the opposite sex in a relationship, then you will probably ask yourself the question: "Is there pure friendship between the opposite sex?" ”
In fact, this is a very controversial topic, but it is actually very simple, that is, your definition and distance of this deep friendship between the opposite sex. Simply put. It is in this kind of relationship that you can grasp the measure of two people getting along. If there is ambiguity in this relationship, then it is not pure friendship.
So how can you judge whether you are pure friendship between the opposite sex, in fact, you already have the answer in your heart, but you also give yourself a test like this, you can ask yourself a few questions.
Your close friend is in love, are you happy for him, or are you angry?
The other party already has an object, do you automatically keep your distance from him? Have you ever thought about ruining the feelings between them.
If the answer you choose is no, then you really think of the other person as your best friend. But if the opposite is true, it proves that the relationship is at least not pure friendship. 、
After all, feelings can not tolerate a third party, think about it from another angle, if you love the other half, he has a very deep feelings of the opposite sex friend, two people get along if it is not the people who understand them, will misunderstand that they are lovers, you say that such feelings will be pure?
The answer is certainly that this feeling is not pure, because two people do not have the boundaries that should be between friends of the opposite sex. Of course, it does not mean that friends of the opposite sex should "die and not interact with each other" when they fall in love.
But what you need to know is that when one party already has a boyfriend or girlfriend, it is polite to know to keep your distance at this time.
After all, in this world, except for men and women, everyone will make friends with the opposite sex. It is acceptable that the other half has friends of the opposite sex, but what cannot be accepted is ambiguous friends of the opposite sex.
Therefore, between the opposite sex, even if the feelings are deep, they need to maintain a measure. Although you are very good friends, after all, people sometimes speak like knives, and you do not keep your distance, it is difficult for the other party not to think about whether the feelings between you are the so-called "friends or more, lovers are not enough." ”
Just like Cheng Youqing and Li Daren in "I May Not Love You" we have seen, their feelings are not pure friendship. Because in the relationship between the two of them, there is never a so-called distance, which is why they witnessed each other's several relationships, and finally ended in nothing.
Because their feelings can be seen, who can accept such feelings. It's as if there is a sentence in the play: "I hate people like you the most, obviously there are ghosts in my heart, but I use the title of good friend, I think I can be infinitely enlightened." ”
Therefore, the best friends of the opposite sex are not without boundaries. Especially when you each have your own feelings, keeping your distance at this time, even if you respect yourself, it is also respect for your other half.
Imagine who can accept a friend of the opposite sex in the highest position, even above themselves. Therefore, between friends of the opposite sex, if the other party already has an object, then they must keep a distance from each other and draw a good boundary to prevent misunderstandings and affect each other's feelings. That's what close friends should do, you say yes or no.
Wen | Ming floating life
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