Wen | Cheats Jun
How old are your children, and are they sleeping in separate rooms now? If there is no room, who does the child sleep with?
It is said that judging whether a family is happy can be seen from the interaction of the whole family going out to travel, or from the demeanor of each family member, but in fact, it can also be seen from who the child sleeps with.
I believe that many families are sleeping in this way:
After giving birth to a baby, Bao Mom was afraid that the baby would make trouble in the middle of the night, and she quarreled with her father who was going to work the next day, so the child slept in a room with her mother, and her father went to sleep in the second bedroom. This is how many years of sleep, until the child sleeps in a separate room.
And the time for children to sleep in separate rooms is also early and late, some three or four years old sleep in separate rooms, and some have not been divided into rooms until they are seven or eight years old, because the children are too clingy, and parents decide to divide the rooms until the children are ten years old.
In fact, if the child sleeps in one room with the mother for a long time and the father sleeps in the other room, the family who does this should wake up. Because this indicates that the family relationship is misaligned.
The child occupies the father's bed, suggesting that the family relationship is misaligned
Psychologists believe that the relationship between husband and wife is the basis of the family relationship, and the relationship between husband and wife is equivalent to the relationship between soil and plants in a pot compared with the relationship between children and parents.
Whether you have raised flowers or not, I believe you understand that only the soil in the pot is good enough for plants to thrive.
In other words, only when the relationship between husband and wife is well managed can a healthy parent-child relationship be cultivated.
But at present, many families have such a situation: the mother and the child are too close, hindering the relationship between the child and the father.
One obvious manifestation is that the husband and wife should be living in the same room, and the child sleeps in the other room, but the child and the mother sleep in the same room for a long time, and the father sleeps in the opposite or next bedroom.
Of course, the cause of this situation may be as follows: Dad is busy at work, has a long working time, and comes home with less time to manage the baby
But no matter what the reason, as long as there is such a fact, it means that the child occupies the bed that should belong to the father, implying that the child has replaced the father and become the mother's closest person. That is to say, the parent-child relationship occupies the main position in a family, and its status is much higher than that of the husband and wife relationship.
Such a couple will put the child first in the family and spoil him everywhere. Children are spoiled excessively, which is not conducive to cultivating a sense of responsibility.
At the same time, mothers who are more intimate with their children will regard their children rather than their husbands as their emotional sustenance, and fathers are marginalized in the family. This is not conducive to the father to exert his male power to influence the child, nor is it conducive to the growth of the child's gender awareness.
The process of raising a child is a process in which parents and children are gradually separated. However, if the child and the mother have been sleeping in the same room and the relationship is too close, it is not conducive to the separation of mother and child. When such a child grows up, he is still psychologically very dependent on his mother, and the possibility of his mother invading the newborn family becomes greater after becoming a family. The contradiction between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law will affect the stability of the newborn family.
In order to make room for the cultivation of husband and wife feelings, and for the growth of children's own independence, parents should give their children a room to sleep in time.
Families with conditions should give their children a room to sleep in time
When is it best for your child to sleep in separate rooms? Preferably around the age of three.
Some parents feel that the child's age is too young, premature room sharing will affect the sense of security, in fact, the sense of security is not achieved by not dividing the room, but the parents in the usual care of the child process, whether the child responds in time, whether there is emotional stability to decide.
Therefore, under the premise of establishing a full sense of security for the child, parents can gently and gradually divide the child into rooms to sleep. Later, you will find that your child's acceptance is much better than you think.
【How old is your baby sleeping in separate rooms?】 Did the process go smoothly? 】
Senior nursery, psychological counselor. Understand the parenting and psychology, but also pay attention to the self-growth and family management of baoma, and strive to be the intimate person of mothers. Welcome to pay attention to [Parenting Cheats], you want to know about parenting nursing, growth and development, family education, mental health, you can find the answer here!