Sayings：
Today I want to talk about a topic that has been pondered for a long time:
I have found that in recent years, when discussing the topic of blind dates on the Internet, the most commonly compared hashtags:
One is "establishment" and the other is "big factory".
There are people who are fighting all year round, whether it is the value of programmers in large factories with an annual package of 500,000 yuan, or the stability of civil servants with a monthly salary of 5,000.
It seems to be the top of the chain of blind date contempt under the two evaluation systems.
One represents (close) financial freedom.
One represents (near) a lifetime iron rice bowl.
Clearly distinguished.
However, when I learned more about these two "peak" groups, I found that:
They follow exactly the same set of rules when they go on a blind date —
A very realistic, very pragmatic set of rules;
A set of rules that pay attention to matching and pay attention to the door-to-door pairs in the new era;
A set of rules that are unfriendly to women;
A set of rules that have nothing to do with love.
I interviewed nearly twenty young people who had had blind date experience in the Internet factory or in the establishment, and asked them to share some experiences and confusion.
Here are some of my findings:
1. Appearance/stereotype
Q: What do I wear on a blind date?
Large factory @Alicia
More casual (casual), less attention paid to dress and aesthetics.
But also don't wear plaid shirts hahahahahaha
Compilation @ Night Shadow
I came into contact with a male civil servant, too old a cadre.
The dressing style is that the plaid shirt is tucked in the trousers.
Q: Where do you usually go?
Large factory @April
My male colleague from the factory, the first time I met about to go to the wetland park (December, ju cold).
Insisted on picking me up by car, trying to show off his car (BMW X5 like it).
Compiled @ Sky Blue
Generally introduce people to arrange the place and eat a meal.
Sometimes the introducer is also present.
Q: Do you handle work on a blind date?
No computer, not so rolled.
But will definitely return the boss message, will return in seconds.
Compiled @ Xing'an
The blind dates are arranged by the leaders.
2. Internal chain of contempt
xx jump > BAT.
Big factory @ ugly poor girl Chen Langlang
Hangzhou > Beijing,
The people of Dachang in Beijing are just ordinary workers.
Rent 1500 houses and save money to marry your daughter-in-law.
The salary of Hangzhou Dachang can help you far out of the average of this city.
Compilation @ sheep small fat
Looking at the treatment of units, monopolizing state-owned enterprises > non-loss-making public institutions > civil servants.
Looking at identity perception, civil servants > non-loss-making public institutions > monopolize state-owned enterprises.
If it is the Beijing area, it should be the best ministry.
Closest to the core.
3. Blind date play that outsiders do not know
A large factory next door has an internal blind date product called "XX Project".
Internally registered, but many girls from outside factories will trust the relationship to find someone to send information inside.
For example, me.
Our factory has hundreds of interest clubs, small hundreds of people, large tens of thousands of people.
The motives are not pure, they are all used for blind dates.
My boyfriend and I hooked up with a motorcycle club.
Big factory @ fire
There is a blind date wall, on the basement floor of the company.
The walls are plastered with information about single dogs in the factory, anonymous, and can be scanned.
There is also a very Internet name, "Cloud Sellers' Friends".
Compiled @ Xiaoyang
This is a networking event organized by our unit years ago:
Here is the information to fill in:
The information will be summarized into an Excel table and sent to the QQ group.
Compiled @ Ah Meow
There are kinds of sorority with other units.
The venue is like a wedding, with an emcee.
Stickers will be attached to each person to distinguish which unit you are in by color.
4. Boys in the big factory & system have their own aura
Big factory programmers do have an aura, high income, and don't have as much money to spend their intestines.
Very affordable objects.
Big factory @ punch punch
Male, 96 years, programmer in the core department of the big factory, 180.
Friends say I'm not suitable for a relationship, but suitable for marriage.
Male, height 175, sunny appearance, good facial features.
Just entered the system, after working for a few months, he was arranged by the small leader to go on a blind date.
Most of the blind dates are teachers, as well as civil servants and career editors.
The marriage standards of girls in our unit are very clear, and the first one is within the system.
First of all, the system itself is very powerful, and the civil servants ashore are equivalent to already having a layer of guarantees, and the wave of excellent ones is selected.
And many parents are also in this industry, so the family is not bad.
My boyfriend is in the same factory as me.
What makes me very unhappy is that my friends and colleagues around me have asked me to "catch" my boyfriend and check the post.
Because he's sought-after.
Although my rank is higher than his, my income is twice that of him, my savings are more than ten times his, and I am about to buy a house in Hangzhou.
They still felt that I should catch him.
5. Blind date market girls inner volume
On the first day of coming to Hangzhou, the taxi driver told me,
xx Baba men are very popular, and xx Baba women cannot marry out in Hangzhou.
Hangzhou mother-in-law thinks you are strong, regardless of home, can't hold.
But I don't believe it.
Dachang @ Inter Standing Committee
Often look at the company's internal forum blind date post,
It is almost all the marriage posts of female employees, but where the height and appearance of the girl is slightly appropriate, the requirements are not low.
I guess the man is not too embarrassed to post on it, anyway, I dare not.
Big factories have never been a plus for girls.
The tanabata friendship of the unit dragged on for a month.
Because single boys can't get together.
I was very popular before I was 25 years old, and when I was 25 years old, I was gone.
The boy on a blind date, even if he is older, will say,
If you don't have children again, you may not be able to give birth.
6, love is scarce
Blind dates think I'm a piece of fat.
80% of the men I dated rushed to my establishment, to my three-month vacation.
Marry me, they can struggle less.
There is a scale in the hearts of both sides, and I am weighing, and he has a weight, and how much burden it is to be together.
A PhD man sent me a resume directly, the kind within the system, writing about all the family situations.
Wanted my dad to solve his job.
After I left the staff, I was slow to sell.
There were even blind dates when I asked if I could go back to my original unit.
My parents said, you dumped a good bowl of porridge.
Compilation @ stink
The other party is a civil servant,
As soon as I came up, I was asked if I was a regular employee of the unit.
Boys with lower incomes and academic qualifications than themselves are not accepted.
In fact, it is very contradictory, while looking down on the utilitarian blind date rules,
While realizing in practice, the backgrounds do not match, and it is really impossible to talk about a piece.
I found that the new generation of these blind dates still think very much like the previous generation.
To be the door to the door.
Ask if you have children.
Don't get married twice.
Women who have passed the optimal fertility period will be picked and chosen.
I used to be very worried that I wouldn't be able to marry at the age of twenty-seven or eight.
But really past that age, but relieved,
Anyway, I "can't sell for a good price" and have passed the "best trading time".
I used to be a person who even thought about how to cut the opening video of the wedding.
There's no rush now.
Originally it is to do the market, why add a workload of offline activities to yourself.
I used to feel very much in need of a man to give me a certificate,
Now I feel that the right to issue this certificate is in my hands.
Written by: Ke Liang
Editor-in-Charge: Tintin
Vespers Hours:
"I've been told since I was a kid.
Women are older, over the age,
If you can't find the object, you will be abandoned.
Now I know,
This is a scam that spreads through ten to ten. ”
——Interviewee @ Langlang
I would like to ask you to think about it:
Through such layers of screening,
What kind of life do we want to live?
What kind of people to love?