Professor Li Meijin, when talking about parents educating their children, said:
"Some parents don't care when they should be in charge, but they are blind when they shouldn't."
When you are not willing to manage it, you will get used to a lot of stinky problems in your child; if you don't want to let go when you should let go, it will hinder the growth of your child.
In terms of educating children, parents should do "five unaccustomed" and "three disregards", so that children can have more success in the future.
Five unaccustomed
1. No rules, no habits
There are black and white in heaven and earth, rules in the world, and a degree in all things.
A rushing river, without a strong, will run out of control and rage everywhere.
The is the rule, guiding the river smoothly into the distance until it joins the sea.
Children have no rules, parents must not, with "he is just a child" as an excuse to get used to.
Don't let the child do whatever he wants, and punish if you break the rules.
From a young age, we can make rules so that we will not be unable to control them when we want to manage them in the future, and then make a big mistake and ruin the child's life.
2. Too lazy to get used to
Some children are too lazy, clothes to reach out, food to open their mouths, the slightest difficulty to escape.
Parents do everything, which will lead to the appearance of unhealthy personalities such as "giant baby" and "mother's treasure" in children, affecting the happiness of a lifetime.
Parents should cultivate the habit of doing housework from an early age, so that children can independently complete what they can.
This not only cultivates the child's self-care ability, but also gives the child the quality of hard work and ability.
The good habit of hard work is of great benefit to children's learning, life and work.
3. Disrespect the elders and cannot get used to it
Respect for elders is a traditional virtue of the mainland and the most basic quality of a person.
Now in many families, there are often several elderly people around a child.
Some children not only call and drink to the elders, but also scold the elders when they are slightly unsatisfied, and the elders are still happy.
A child who is disrespectful to his elders at home does not know what politeness is in society.
If children develop a arrogant and arrogant personality, they will certainly be educated by society in the future and suffer hardships.
4. Do not understand gratitude, can not get used to
Parents are accustomed to giving the best things to their children exclusively, but they are reluctant to enjoy themselves.
Slowly, the child will take for granted what others give, not only not appreciating the efforts of others, but also asking for them with courage.
Such a selfish child can easily become a parasite when he grows up, and it will plague his parents for the rest of his life.
Parents should not only give to their children, but also teach their children to learn to give and be grateful.
A child who knows how to be grateful will not be bad in the future.
5. Crying and playing, can not be used to
When children cry and play, if parents often compromise, they will let the children form the wrong idea: as long as they cry all the time, they can get what they want.
Satisfying children without principle will make children not know right from wrong and develop a character of nonsense.
Parents should learn to firmly refuse, the child's unreasonable demands, so that children understand the principles and bottom line in interpersonal communication.
Three disregard
1. Do what you can, don't care
Parents cannot accompany their children for a lifetime, and in the future, children will still have to go their own way independently.
What children can do when they grow up, they should be allowed to do it.
Giving children a free environment can help children grow better.
Parents should not dislike their children for doing slowly and badly, let the children try to do it on their own, and the children will grow.
2. Personal private space, don't care
Regardless of age, anyone has their own private space.
Parents want to know their children, which is understandable, but also respect their children's privacy.
To truly understand the child is to enter the child's heart through good communication.
Snooping on the child's privacy will only cause the child's resistance and rebellion.
3. Choose your own target, don't care
A life that cannot make its own choices and has always been dominated by its parents is pathetic.
Parents should give their children the right and freedom to choose, from what to wear and what to do.
In the future, when children face life choices, they can listen to their hearts and make the decisions that are most suitable for them.
Parents with foresight know how to strictly manage when they should be strictly managed, and let go when they should let go.
Tension is moderate, this is the best love for children.