Whether the marriage relationship can last, the key is only three words

1

Yesterday, I watched an emotional show and was blinded by the love logic of a small couple.

The two are college classmates, have been together since their sophomore year, and their relationship has always been good.

After graduation, the two returned to their respective cities for internships and began a long-distance relationship. Love, which was once very beautiful, has become contradictory because of a different place.

The girl said that her boyfriend didn't care about her anymore and couldn't even remember the most important birthday. Of course, this is not excessive, the most angry thing for me is that he let him come to my hometown to develop, he refused, but bought a house in his hometown, what does he mean?

The boy said, I have connections in my hometown, wherever I go, there are people to help you, go to the city where you live, you are not familiar with life and can not carry out a career, buying a house in my hometown is to prepare for the future.

The girl is angry, you are also too selfish, have you ever thought about my feelings, I will be uncomfortable in a strange city.

The boy said, you come here with me, it will make you happy.

The two have their own opinions, and neither of them will let go of their words and go to the other's city to live.

The host asked incomprehensibly, do you love each other?

As a result, the two said love almost at the same time.

The audience burst into laughter. The host also laughed helplessly.

The little couple says they love, but neither of them will make sacrifices for love.

The host finally said a meaningful word, you may love each other, but each other's credibility is not high, such a love even if you love each other temporarily, it is difficult to cultivate the right results in the end.

2

Some time ago, one of my girlfriends suddenly canceled the wedding, and I held the invitation card she had sent earlier in my hand and called to inquire about the reason.

The girlfriend was a boyfriend they met at a party, and the two spent a year together and had a good relationship. The boyfriend is gentle and considerate, can speak well, especially when making mistakes, and the apologetic attitude is very sincere, so that you can't help but be soft and will forgive him.

The girlfriend said that it was because he had a super good attitude of admitting mistakes, but he made himself very insecure. She told a few little things.

Once, on his phone, she found that he had a very ambiguous conversation with a netizen named Wild Boar, but he explained that Wild Boar was a boy. In order to prove his innocence, in front of her, he deleted all the information of the other party and said that he would never contact him again.

That day, she went to pick him up from work to have dinner and found him and a girl standing in the side door of the company arguing, and the quarrel was very bad. She stepped forward to ask why, but he couldn't help but pull her away. Afterwards, he said that the girl was an ex-girlfriend, and he had broken the thread and harassed him, and he was arguing to defend his current love.

Because the parents of both parties urged marriage, they were also making intense preparations. At that time, the purchase price was set at 120 square meters, but when the down payment was paid, it turned out to be 80 square meters, he explained that it was a mistake in the sales of the house, and constantly apologized to her and admitted the mistake, saying that he was negligent.

The girlfriend said that she later learned that the wild boar was a quarrel girl, not an ex-girlfriend, or he was flirting with his sister. The house was something he had deliberately done and didn't want to buy the area he had promised before. Every time the matter was revealed, he wept and apologized, saying that he would never do it again. With him, there is no sense of security, there is no credibility, and can only choose to break up.

It is better to say well than to do well, and only by doing well can we see and touch it, otherwise we will not be steadfast in our hearts.

Shakespeare also said that true love cannot be expressed in words, and that deeds are the best illustration of faithfulness.

3

In a good relationship, the most important thing is trust, and only by trusting each other can we have a sense of security. The level of trust determines the level of credibility.

There is a negligible difference between trustworthiness and trust.

American psychologist John. In his "The Fight of Love", Gottman made the most concise interpretation of credibility and trust. He said that the degree of trust is that two people tolerate each other or protect each other, and the degree of mutual trust is relatively high, and the feelings will be very deep.

Credibility refers to how willing a person is to sacrifice themselves for a relationship, and if a couple's trust is high, their credibility is often high as well. If the level of trust is low, the level of credibility will not be high.

That is to say, it is not enough to just love each other, both parties must also have a relatively high degree of credibility, which is the key to determining whether the marriage relationship is lasting.

Credibility is the test of each other's position in each other's mind, its weight, its willingness to make sacrifices, and so on. Usually it is said that you love me, but at the critical moment, one party must always make sacrifices to prove that the credibility is relatively high, so that the other party can have the confidence and courage to continue to love. Otherwise, each other is in a state of suspicion and suspicion, where will there be a good marriage relationship.

In the hit drama "Ode to Joy", Wang Baichuan has always said that he loves Fan Shengmei, and he has done a lot for her, and he trusts and loves each other deeply. However, when Fan Shengmei asked to write his name on the property deed, Wang Baichuan refused.

Because Wang Baichuan's mother did not agree, he did not dare to disobey his mother's will for his girlfriend, and he was also afraid that the Fan family's brother and sister-in-law would come to compete, so he refused to write Fan Shengmei's name.

In the face of love, Wang Baichuan refused to make sacrifices, so that Fan Shengmei could not see hope, and his credibility was reduced. When everyone thought they were so in love that they should get married, they broke up.

Whether the marriage relationship can last, the key is only three words, credibility.

Some people fall in love at first sight and some people hate each other late, but in the end they still fail to cultivate the right results, in fact, in the end, they have not delivered enough trust to each other, they have no determination to be righteous for love, they leave room for each other, in the process of constantly weighing and compromising, calculating their own gains and losses, each other has not reached the credibility they deserve, and naturally they cannot come together.

Love each other to be frank and unreserved, the key moment can be paid for love, rather than sacrifice their own interests to complete each other, on this basis, in order to increase credibility, in order to better continue the marriage relationship.