Many mothers always have some troubles when they grow up guarding their children. "My baby is so clingy, as long as I'm here, I don't do anything myself, what should I do?" "The children are too clingy, I still have work to do, what should I do?" "Is it a sign that a child is clingy to a person who is insecure?" "What if a boy is too clingy when he is a child and grows up without an opinion?" ”
This kind of problem emerges in an endless stream, in real life, it is not difficult for us to see this phenomenon, there are often parents with children walking in the community, children playing and playing to go to the mother's side, begging the mother to hug, and the father only plays with the mobile phone on the side, what is the reason for this?
Is it certainly insecure that the child is too clingy? Does the little boy have no responsibility after being clingy? I think this statement is completely wrong. So why do boys always get close to their mothers?
The child sticks to the mother, these three psychological hints to read
: Insecurity
The biggest concern for mothers is whether their children are clingy or insecure. According to scientific evidence, children's clinginess is largely a sign of a lack of security.
Before the age of 3, the child's side is always only the parents, their dependence and trust on the parents can be said to be very strong, at this time if the child does not receive the absolute attention of the parents, then they will have insecurity, and then show clingy behavior.
: Gender consciousness begins to develop
Same-sex repulsion, heterosexual attraction, little boys at the age of 3-6 years old will produce "Oedipus complex", simply put, the Oedipal complex, will have a special dependence on opposite-sex parents.
At this time, the baby begins to explore the world, with gender awareness, they will be curious about people who are different from themselves, why do they come from, why is the mother different from them?
It's like when we were kids we always asked, "Mom, how did I get here?" At this time, the mother will say: "Child, you are sent by your mother with a phone bill!" Although it is only a small joke, it reveals the truth of the opposite sex attraction in the growth of children.
And this kind of Oedipus complex always makes the mothers feel panic, afraid that the child will treat the father as an enemy, and the excessive psychology will become distorted in the long run, but in fact, the mothers do not have to panic, this is just a stage of the child's growth. Generally, after the boy reaches the age of six, he goes to school and is exposed to new and strange things, and the children will slowly eliminate the Oedipus complex and begin to be curious about teachers and classmates.
: Attachment personality
Finally, there is another reason for the phenomenon of boys kissing their mothers, and that is personality. Although each child has a different personality, some may be cheerful and lively and willing to make friends; some may be reserved and reserved, and they are more sensitive to social interaction.
Boys' personality is too shy for growth is not a good point, mothers should pay attention to their children are too reticent, too fragile, always pay attention, timely correction, to avoid children due to personality defects caused by psychological problems.
Parents should pay attention to their children's psychological development in a timely manner
Before the age of 2, parents should try to be close to their children, respond to their needs, meet their children's needs, and give them the greatest sense of security.
After the age of 3, the boy enters the stage of heterosexual attraction, then the mother needs to properly keep a distance from the child, so that the role of the father plays a role in this stage, 3-9 years old children cultivate personality, learn knowledge are based on imitation progress, which requires the father to be an example, standardize their behavior, let the son grow up with himself into a qualified man.
Parents should spend more time with their children during this period. Some psychologists say that when a child asks for help from a parent, if the parent responds to the child within 7 seconds, the child will have a great sense of security and satisfaction.
The growth of children is the long-term work position of parents and mothers, boys and mothers are not a serious problem, but this is a phenomenon that deserves parents' high attention, if there is no timely guidance, it is easy to leave hidden dangers for the future growth of boys, and parents and fathers should solve problems in a timely and effective manner, and paint a beautiful, sunny and brilliant picture for the child's growth!