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When it comes to Xu Zhimo, the first two words that people think of are generally: the proud son of heaven and the scumbag.
It is said that he is the proud son of heaven because Xu Zhimo has written countless poems in his lifetime, among which "Farewell to Kangqiao", "Sayonara", "I Wait for You", "Change and Change", "Chance" and so on are widely praised by people.
So why call him a scumbag?
It was inseparable from the three women in his life.
It is ridiculous to say that Xu Zhimo wrote countless poems in his life, but only wrote "Laughing and Solving the Troubled Knot" once for his wife, Zhang Youyi.
Come, now let go of your face and smile, shake hands and work together;
This goes to the breeze day, the scenery of the free road is good.
Listening to the cheers behind him, the controversy disbanded the knot,
Eliminate the annoyance!
——《
Laugh to solve the knot of troubles
fragment
On the day of writing this poem, Zhang Youyi signed the divorce agreement and burst into tears.
Xu Zhimo cheered and wrote this poem with a pen, gave it to his wife Zhang Youyi, and ended his first marriage.
When she married Xu Zhimo, Zhang Youyi was only 15 years old. In order to complete the marriage arranged by the family, she had to give up her studies and marry far away to Zhejiang, becoming Xu Zhimo's wife.
Growing up in an era of feudal etiquette, Zhang Youyi received moral education from an early age: from her father at home, and from her husband to her husband. Therefore, after becoming Mrs. Xu, she behaved demurely, obediently and gently, and kept her home in good order.
However, these advantages are in Xu Zhimo's eyes: earthy and vulgar.
How much does Xu Zhimo dislike Zhang Youyi? After getting married, Xu Zhimo went abroad to study, Zhang Youyi went to visit, and the first thing the two people did when they met was to buy clothes.
This is not because Xu Zhimo likes her, but because Xu Zhimo feels that the Chinese clothes worn by Zhang Youyi are too earthy and humiliating himself.
In Xu Zhimo's view, this marriage has nothing to do with love, it is "the words of parents, the order of the matchmaker", he just obeys orders, nothing more.
Therefore, after getting married, Xu Zhimo did not bring Any warmth and love to Zhang Youyi, and ignored Zhang Youyi in addition to fulfilling his basic marital obligations.
After Zhang Youyi went abroad, she was busy from morning to night every day, buying things, washing clothes, cleaning, and cooking, just like a nanny.
What about Xu Zhimo? Every morning, he hurried out of the house and ran to London to meet his "soul mate" Lin Huiyin.
At this time, Xu Zhimo's eldest son was almost two years old, and Zhang Youyi was pregnant with Xu Zhimo's younger son.
Originally, it was a very happy thing, but Xu Zhimo was completely unhappy, and now he only wanted to divorce immediately and then marry Lin Huiyin.
For Xu Zhimo, Zhang Youyi is the product of the forbidden ritual religion, his emotionless wife, and the burden he wants to get rid of every day, while Lin Huiyin is completely different, an angel, and his soul mate.
In pursuit of this soul mate, it doesn't matter if you sacrifice everything.
Therefore, even if he abandons his wife and son, even if everyone rebels and leaves, he will still pursue Lin Huiyin.
Unfortunately, things did not turn out the same as he imagined.
Time is like water, always speechless.
If you're okay, it's sunny.
This is a poem written by Xu Zhimo to Lin Huiyin.
If Zhang Youyi gave Xu Zhimo marriage, then what Lin Huiyin brought to Xu Zhimo was love.
In 1920, at the age of 16, Lin Hui wandered away from Europe and met Xu Zhimo, who was studying abroad. This year, Xu Zhimo's eldest son Xu Jikai just turned two years old, and although Xu Zhimo is not proud of the spring breeze, he can also be called mature and stable.
When a young and beautiful girl meets a mature and stable uncle, the next story seems to come naturally.
Lin Huiyin admired Xu Zhimo's profound knowledge and elegant conversation, Xu Zhimo liked Lin Huiyin's beauty and talent, and even thought that Lin Huiyin was his "only soul mate".
During the period of love with Lin Huiyin, Xu Zhimo, who was nourished by love, created a large number of love poems:
"Accidental", "You Go", "The Joy of Snowflakes", "In the Mountains"....
At this time, there is another person who is silently in love with Xu Zhimo, that is, his wife: Zhang Youyi.
At this time, for Xu Zhimo, his wife is no longer the responsibility of the family and the sustenance of feelings, but a roadblock between himself and true love.
In order to remove this stone, Xu Zhimo quickly divorced Zhang Youyi, and in 1922, he returned to China and wanted to marry Lin Huiyin. This time, however, it was Lin Huiyin's turn to refuse.
Although Lin Huiyin admired Xu Zhimo's talent and cultivation, she was not as rebellious as Xu Zhimo, and for her, marriage was much more important than love.
Therefore, when she learned of Zhang Youyi's existence, she took the initiative to give up this relationship, married Liang Sicheng, the son of Xu Zhimo's mentor, under the arrangement of her parents, and persuaded Xu Zhimo to treat his wife well.
Although Xu Zhimo told himself again and again, "I am lucky, but I can't be killed", he can't control himself to find Lin Huiyin.
He invited Lin Huiyin to visit Xiangshan mountain at night, confide in her, and even came to Lin Huiyin in front of Liang Sicheng. Later, Liang Sicheng couldn't bear it anymore and posted a note on the door of his house: Love needs to be alone. Xu Zhimo could only give up.
Xu Zhimo, who has lost his "only soul mate", can only comfort himself with "I am fortunate, not my life" while re-embarking on the journey of finding true love.
This time, he met Lu Xiaoman.
To some extent, Lu Xiaoman and Xu Zhimo are a type of person.
The first time Xu Zhimo met Lu Xiaoman was at a dance party. At this time, just like the repetition of the story when I met Lin Huiyin, it was just that the person who had a marriage contract was replaced.
Lu Xiaoman's husband is Xu Zhimo's good friend: Wang Geng.
In order to make his wife live a better life, Wang Geng put a lot of his energy into reading, working and doing studies, giving Lu Xiaoman a very comfortable life.
At the same time, her husband's excessive busyness also made Lu Xiaoman feel lonely and empty.
Soon after meeting Xu Zhimo, Wang Geng was transferred to Harbin for work reasons and asked Xu Zhimo to take care of his wife, as a result, Xu Zhimo took care of his good friend's wife as his own.
Lu Xiaoman liked Xu Zhimo, and in order to be with him, he resolutely chose divorce.
Wang Geng is also a very open-minded and open person, not only agreeing to the divorce, but also becoming the only one who blesses them.
Xu Zhimo wanted to marry Lu Xiaoman, which was not an easy task.
First of all, Xu Zhimo's father did not agree to this marriage, and after divorcing Zhang Youyi, his father not only stopped giving him financial support, recognized Zhang Youyi as a dry daughter, but also refused to participate in his wedding with Lu Xiaoman.
Therefore, Xu Zhimo had to find his master Liang Qichao.
However, Liang Qichao was not very willing, but he could not resist the pleading of his students and had to agree. But he refused to send blessings to the two, and for the first time in history, he cursed in public at the wedding:
Xu Zhimo, you are an impetuous person, so that you have nothing to learn, you can't do learning, and you are even more a failure to be a person, and your divorce and remarriage is proof of your inattentiveness!
Lu Xiaoman, you and Xu Zhimo are both people who have come over, I hope that from now on you can abide by the way of women, review your personality and behavior, divorce and remarriage are all caused by the faults of your character, I hope that you will not make a mistake and mistake yourself!
Although this marriage is in love, it is not blessed by people, and it is also full of drama after marriage.
When love meets reality, romance meets chai rice oil and salt, they begin to encounter problems that they have never thought of before:
On the one hand, Xu Zhimo quarreled constantly because of Lu Xiaoman's discord with his parents.
On the other hand, it is Lu Xiaoman who is unwilling to change his profligate living habits, and Xu Zhimo has to run around in order to support his family.
Xu Zhimo, who does not know how to sacrifice everything for love, has he regretted it when he experienced this?
People often sing the praises of love, saying that it is something more precious than life.
We cry because of Liang Shanbo and Zhu Yingtai, they gave up their lives for love, we lament juliet and Romeo, for love, they can give up everything.
We support everyone in the pursuit of love and happiness, but here is the only premise:
All love, all happiness, should not be based on the suffering of others.
If Xu Zhimo can resist the pressure of his family and refuse to marry Zhang Youyi, if Lu Xiaoman is not married to Wang Geng, then this story may also become a good story in the world.
Unfortunately, there are no ifs.
Once upon a time, the carriage and horses were very slow, the letters were far away, and there was only enough to love one person in a lifetime.
Mu Xin's "Once Upon a Time Slow" has been repeatedly mentioned by people in recent years, in fact, what people miss is not the past when everything was very slow, but the era of choosing a city to grow old and choose a person with a white head.
Nowadays, people are always pursuing love, pursuing freedom, and pursuing happiness, using this as a name to linger in the flowers, using the search for true love as a reason, and forgiving themselves again and again for the harm they have brought to others. Just like Xu Zhimo in those years.
After Xu Zhimo and Zhang Youyi divorced, his mentor Liang Qichao wrote to him:
Human beings value themselves in compassion for all things, and are obliged not to exchange the suffering of others for their own happiness.
Those who pursue happiness never realize:
Love at the expense of hurting others can never be equated with happiness.
The best feelings are love, grace and righteousness, and no shame.
Only in this way can you calmly promise your lover:
May there be one heart, and the white head will not be separated.
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