▲ "This Thought" guest Yog Dirks
Guide
Mindfulness is a very simple concept. Its power lies in practice and application. Mindfulness means focusing in a special way: consciously, without judgment, focusing on the present moment. This concentration makes us more conscious, clearer, and more accepting of the reality of the moment. It awakens us to the fact that our lives unfold only in one present moment after another.
- "Mindfulness: This Moment is a Flower"
So how does mindfulness unleash a child's potential? How to introduce mindfulness education into parent-child relationships and family education? A group of Zen masters, the German Mindfulness Meditation Center instructor, Yog Dirks, shares with you the practice of mindfulness that you can do at home.
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Life Growing Up Season 2 Yog Dirks Documentary (1)
The second season of "Life and Growth"
See life, see growth, see the wider world
01
The first: the method of self-calming
The concept of mindfulness has become popular over the past few years because there have been many scientific studies of the brain and studies on the positive effects of healthy memory that have come to positive conclusions, so I believe that this mindfulness training and practice can help children how to face stress, how to concentrate, and we just want to focus on the positives. Focus on how to get kids to develop more skills.
There are three ways to practice that can be taught to parents, and these are all methods that can be practiced on a regular basis and are very practical.
The first, the four steps to self-calmness, when we are under pressure, we can do this:
Step 1: Relax your shoulders.
Step 2: Take a deep breath.
Step 3: Put your hands on your abdomen, feel your belly, and take another deep breath.
Step 4: Think of something wonderful that can have a positive impact on you, like eating ice cream or enjoying playing table tennis.
We repeat it like this, and the more we practice, the better the results.
One mother told me that once she and her son went to the dentist, her son used to be so afraid to go to the dentist, and every visit to the dentist was like a disaster. But after my son took my mindfulness class, on the way to the dentist, her son said, "Mom, when I go to the doctor today, I can practice these four steps." ”
After the mother spoke to the dentist, her son lay down, put his hands on his abdomen, took a deep breath, and then the dentist gave him anesthesia, and her son showed particular bravery. So adults can practice with children. If you practice this for a long time, then this method can be used in daily life.
02
The second kind: discover the beauty of children,
And sincerely praise him
The second method is more convenient and simple: praise your child when you observe that he is doing well, or when he is doing his best to do something.
I will observe every child. I record the behaviors of the children I observe and the behaviors that I particularly enjoy. At the end of the lesson, I give each child a piece of feedback, telling them what I observed and what I appreciated from them.
For example, I would say, "Kevin, I noticed that when Martin said he forgot his pencil today, you immediately gave him one of your pencils." I think you are a particularly helpful and kind person and I liked that very much. ”
Or, "Thomas, when I'm going to pick a classmate to discuss something in front of the whole class, you're very brave, you say you come first, I noticed that, you acted brave, I liked that." ”
To each child, I say what I observe and what I particularly appreciate. These don't have to have anything to do with their achievements.
My attitude as an adult is that we can learn something from our children. If you notice the positive side of your child, talk to him directly and say it sincerely, so for parents, it's also an exercise to look at things from a specific perspective.
03
The third: establish a small ritual before going to bed,
Train an active brain
Third, there is another exercise that I would like to recommend to students and parents, which we call "bean practice".
I will give parents or students five beans, not the soft one, but the hard one, and don't eat it.
I ask them to put the beans in your pocket, and whenever you see something beautiful, something that makes you feel grateful, or something you particularly like, take out a bean and put them in another pocket. Whenever you feel happy, you do it. That way, you'll train your brain to look for positive things.
If you look for positive things, your state will get better. This allows a habit to be formed.
There was a mother who did this exercise with her daughter before, and when the day was over, the mother would say that I already had two beans in my other pocket, and the child would say, "Mom, I already have three," and the mother would let the child talk about these happy times today, and we would share the happy moments with each other.
Especially when the day is over, when you put your child to sleep, you can set up a small ritual to talk about the three happiest moments of your day, so that parents and children will know how to focus on positive things, especially before going to bed, if you want something beautiful, your sleep will be better.
Ask each other how many beans they have in their other pocket and share the good things of the day so that the quality of sleep will be better. It's an interesting way to learn to focus on positive things.
If you think it's all too bad today, it will also affect your sleep, and I think the kids are doing really well. I gave a boy five beans, and when he came back to class a week later, he said, "Mr. Yog, in five minutes, my five beans are in another pocket." I said, "That's great, I've never been so fast, how did you do it?" "After class, my mom took me to the ice cream parlor, and the ice cream was so delicious, so I brought all five beans." "That's our attitude.
We try to enhance the effect of positive things, and if there are some negative emotions, we try to convert them by accepting them.
We're scared, we're going to feel scared, it's normal, but we try to calm ourselves down, and it's really about how to focus, support, and reinforce the positives. Calm yourself down and observe your own state, I really feel like I see hope from the kids.
Because I found that if they had the conditions and the atmosphere to grow, they could develop a lot of abilities, so I thought we could find ways to help them.
This idea is produced
"Life and Growth" documentary series
Season 2 Guest List
Yin Ye | CEO of BGI Gene, Science Popularization V
Peng Kaiping | psychologist and dean of the School of Social Sciences at Tsinghua University
Yan Bojun | popular science author, "got" the lecturer of "Western Art Class"
Tian Hongjie | expert in child psychological education
Dong Mei | Associate Professor at the School of Humanities of the Central Academy of Fine Arts
Ye Xunqian | theater educator and director
Huang Shiming | founder of the Endless Hypnosis Academy
Hao Jingfang | Founder of The Hugo Award for "Folding Beijing" by Tong Xing Academy
Chen Haixian | Psychological counselor, psychological writer
Yog Dilkes | a group of Zen masters and instructors at the German Mindfulness Meditation Center
Li Songwei | psychology science popularization big V
Jeffrey Sade | the "father of modern medical hypnosis" Milton Erikson
John Beyman | the world's top Satya master of family therapy
Otto Charmo | Founder of U-shape theory
- END -
When you have negative emotions,
How do you make yourself feel better?
Produced by | This thought
Edit | Acting
Typography | Wang Ah Jing