The mainland's two-child policy was fully liberalized in 2016, and many families will consider having a second child, on the one hand, they all look forward to having both children, on the other hand, they consider that their children have a playmate, so that the family will be more lively.
Although many parents are planning to have a second child, they do not know that the age difference between the two children has a great impact on future parenting.
For example, if the age difference between the two babies is small, then the parents will be powerless, the boss needs to accompany and care, and the small one is waiting to be fed, how can it be taken into account? Taking care of this other child is bound to be lost.
Seeing this, some people may ask, is it not the difference in age between two children, the better? This way the boss can help take care of the small ones, and he can also relax himself.
In fact, this is not good, first of all, consider the physical factors of baoma, and secondly, many children grow up, and do not want to have a brother or sister who is so much younger than themselves, so how big is the difference between the two children?
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The happiest "second child age difference", two children do not compete for favors and do not drag, this number is good
The age difference should be between 4 and 6 years old
American psychologists have conducted relevant studies on the age difference between children, and set up three different experimental subjects, one group is three years old, one group has an age difference of five years, and one group has an age difference of seven years.
After a certain time control variable survey, the family happiness index with an age difference of five years is higher, whether it is the parents' evaluation of the child or the evaluation between the children, it is gratifying.
Because the age difference is five years old, the first child is mature enough, has enough sense of responsibility, can treat his biological brother correctly, and reduces a lot of unnecessary pampering behavior.
It is precisely because children get along more harmoniously with each other, parents will save a lot of energy, can the happiness index not be high? On the contrary, families with too small and too large an age difference will have a lot of unexpected troubles.
In addition, families with two or more children in the family must learn to balance, give children love and care, and must not ignore the child's inner feelings because of their own negligence, especially Dabao, and should give more care.
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How does a two-child family balance the love of two children?
Soothe Dabao's heart
First of all, to solve the fundamental problem from the mentality, the lack of care time is objective, but also a short period of time, and the love in the mother's heart has not decreased, to explain to the big treasure clearly, because just had a small baby, more need to be taken care of by the mother.
When you were very young, your mother also took care of you day and night, you got more love than a baby, and when the second treasure grew up, we could play together.
When a contradiction arises, first appease Dabao
The child is small but also has self-esteem, has done something wrong, do not expose it in front of another child, it is best to talk to him privately. When the two children clashed, mom and dad first appeased Dabao, and then together with Dabao, they comforted Erbao.
After mediating the conflict, you can end with a hug to calm the children's emotions faster. This can not only make Dabao feel valued, but also will not affect the feelings between the two children.
Teach children concepts to share
It is not the big that makes the small, the small also need to learn to share, do not interfere too much with the child's interaction, listen to their opinions and see their practices.
Do not intervene in quarrels between children
Children get along with each other naturally indispensable friction, light quarrels and fights to grab things, heavy is directly fighting, when parents naturally do not want children to fight, they will immediately come forward to stop, some mothers will say: "You are a brother, so you have to let your brother (or sister)".
In fact, rather than understanding your reasoning, the child's strongest feelings are "loss" and "being robbed", thus becoming hostile to younger siblings.
If you want to avoid conflicts between children, parents must remember that they must not interfere in children's quarrels. It's best to let them solve it on their own.
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Read further: What is the best age for a woman to have children?
Women are only suitable for childbearing after their own development and maturity, and in general, women themselves mature until about 25 years old. With the continuous growth of age, due to the pressure of work, family, life and so on, women's bodies begin to decline after the age of 30, so the best age for women to have children is between 25 and 30 years old.
During this period, from the perspective of physical function, the possibility of diabetes, hypertension, and hyperlipidemia is relatively small; the body is in a state of relatively strong metabolism, which is relatively easy and more suitable for conception, and the egg quality at this age is good, and it is not easy to have the risk of miscarriage and chromosomal malformations.
Women over the age of 35 and then give birth to become elderly mothers, whether it is for the fetus or for women's postpartum repair is not good, women can have children between 25 and 35 years old, and the best age of childbearing is between 25 and 30 years old.