If the child's academic performance is not good, what is the problem?
As parents, we can't wait to pour our hearts on our children. However, many times, even if you put more effort into your child, supervise homework or apply for cram school, your child's academic performance is still no improvement, just like falling into a bottleneck period.
Parents and friends are often very anxious, blindly thinking of adding something to their children. In fact, at this time, it is often not the children who encounter the bottleneck, but the parents. There's a good chance you're stuck in a "low-level" closed loop of logic that causes yourself and your child to be busy all day and get nothing done.
Stop letting low-level logic close the loop and plague children!
The closed loop of low-level logic refers to the process of some ideas that sound ridiculous and become self-consistent through a causal cycle. For example, children especially like to watch cartoons, and basically sit in front of the screen in all their free time. The mother felt very angry, the child's poor learning is harmed by this cartoon, so the parents reported the cartoon to the shelves.
In this process, the cause: the child watches cartoons - the result: the learning becomes worse. Logic reaches self-consistency, and the mother falls into a low-level logic closed loop.
At this time, if the child tries to say to the mother, the cartoon is not directly related to my grades. Then this parent must not listen. Resting on its laurels, this is the second feature of the low-level logic closed loop. When she thinks her logic is perfect and correct, she can't listen to different voices; for him, all questioning from the outside is wrong or ill-intentioned.
It is possible to reply to the child: I don't know you yet? Don't you just want to watch cartoons and don't read books? At this time, how will the child feel? Eighty percent feel that parents are unreasonable and unable to communicate.
This is scary. You know, education is a matter for both sides, namely parents and children. When the child loses the desire to communicate with you, it is useless for the parents to say more. At the same time, it is also a parent who falls into a low-level logic closed loop, which has the worst impact on their children.
Stop your narrow-mindedness, high-level parents think so
So is it not necessarily a good thing to close the loop of logic? You can't think of it that way either. Since there is a low-level logical closed loop, there is naturally a high-level logic closed loop.
The biggest difference between the high-level logical closed loop and the former is that it has a high degree of openness and flexibility in high-level thinking. Again, when a high-level parent faces her child's always watching cartoons, her logic of thinking is to explore the reasons – try to communicate and understand – and take action.
Specific performance we can make an analogy: after the mother communicates, she found that the reason why the child loves to watch cartoons may be because she feels lonely, so it affects the academic performance, so the solution is to take more time to play games with the child, and the child's life is more fulfilling, and he is not so addicted to cartoons, and he will spend more thought on learning and improve his grades.
Children always watch cartoons so they don't learn well, which is actually a general and closed idea. High-level logic, on the contrary, is precise and concrete. It is not terrible for parents to fall into a low-level logic closed loop. Falling into without knowing it, or refusing to step out of one's own narrowness, is terrible.
Parents with high-level logic closed loops, these two points are also very important
1. Learn to repair the ring
Some parents have formed a logical closed loop at a high level, giving themselves the possibility of a transition. In the process of transition, we must pay attention to maintaining an open attitude and keeping pace with the times, so as to improve our own logical closed loop, this process is "repairing the ring".
2. Grasp the focus of your child's learning
There are too many things about children, there are test scores, hobbies, physical and mental health... Parents cannot be demanding that their children be all-round. Therefore, in different stages of growth, parents should find the focus of education and stick to it. For example, if a child who is about to enter the beginning of primary school has the most important grades, then other irrelevant courses can be stopped.
Write at the end:
The child's learning effect is urgent, and parents should calm their minds. Maintain an open, receptive state of mind; always rest your own logical closed loop.