Hello everyone, I am a tomato mother who practices lifelong learning!
Cultivating children to be very good is the original intention of every parent to educate their children. However, when really educating children, some parents' wrong words and deeds, inappropriate education methods have caused a lot of harm to the growth of children. Whether a child becomes a talent or "raises waste" is closely related to the family education he received.
One of my college classmates, who is 31 years old, talked about a boyfriend and was planning to get married at the end of the year, but the two broke up again. She said that now she finds it so difficult to marry herself, because marrying her is equivalent to marrying her whole family.
The classmate has a younger brother, and she is a dragon and phoenix fetus, but the treatment of the two people from childhood to adulthood is different. My brother grew up eating breast milk, and she grew up drinking cheap milk powder. My brother had eggs in the morning, and she only had noodles. Her parents valued her brother's academic performance and did not expect her to go to college.
However, the growth results of the two children backfired, and the daughter was admitted to a key university and graduated to find a job in a foreign company, with an annual salary of more than 200,000 yuan. My younger brother dropped out of school because of a fight with his classmates in junior high school, and he reached out to open his mouth at home, and he kept nibbling on the old age and enjoying himself.
Now, when the parents are getting older and make less money, the younger brother turns around and starts to "pit sister". He is in his thirties, does not work, has no girlfriend, his parents take care of him to live, and his sister has to pay him on time.
My sister's boyfriend wanted to find a job for him because he said a few words, and his parents said, "Anyway, this is her brother, whether there is a job or not, you will all be in charge of him in the future." "Good fellow, just scare this "brother-in-law- in-law" away.
Supporting parents is the responsibility of children, but this younger brother is young and strong, when will he be raised? No one wants to carry this heavy burden.
Such a "nibbling old man" who lies at home every day, we always hear about it from time to time in our lives, and the Internet always hears about it. The second half of the parents' lives are also very painful, because the parents' original wrong way of education has ruined the child's life.
Most of the children who are abandoned are from the following three types of families, and if you have such behavior, it is best to correct it quickly
Parents are "servants" at home, and children are "young masters".
Parents love their children, they would rather suffer themselves than let their children suffer a little grievance, there is good food, children eat first, parents make money must also be close to the child to spend. Children enjoy a very high family status at home, and the selfless efforts of parents make children feel that this is all deserved.
There are many families whose parents are farmers and workers, whose parents are dressed in rags, but the children are Apple mobile phones, and the clothes are brand-name.
Everything is for the sake of the child, and as a result the child is used to such a life, I should live a superior life. When parents can't meet their children's wishes, they will also be complained by their children, "Can't afford me, why should they give birth to me"?
When the child grows up, he is not willing to overcome a little difficulty, only willing to enjoy the support of his parents and become a "white-eyed wolf" who does not understand gratitude.
Children have bad habits, and parents still condone it regardless of teaching.
Our child's kindergarten classmates, because his grandparents are particularly doting on him, so this child often loses his temper and scolds his grandparents. Not only did his grandparents not criticize and educate him, but they often comforted themselves: when the child grows up, he will understand things.
However, after the child entered the primary school, he was persuaded by the teacher to transfer because of his flying. Because as long as the teacher says what he doesn't like to hear, he will resist, even swear words, and his parents can't control it.
Many criminals, they know that what they are doing is wrong, but they think that their parents can always settle for themselves. I don't know what this child will become when he grows up.
Parents condone children who do not know how to respect their elders, and elders condone children to make mistakes and do not think so, and as a result, children are lawless at home. However, society is not your home, the law does not pay attention to family affection, and one day when you touch the bottom line, you will be punished as you deserve.
Parents take care of their children too thoughtfully, and their children's self-care ability is too poor.
When we were in college, we had a roommate who often packed up and sent dirty clothes home for my mom to wash and send back. Later, she could not take care of herself in life, and she was unwilling to suffer hardships in studying, because she dropped out of school because of multiple homework.
When the child is small, we should take good care of the child. However, a child's ability to live needs to be cultivated from an early age. Many parents love their children and are unwilling to let them suffer a little, so they take care of everything for their children, and their children's self-care ability is very poor. Moreover, because the child has not experienced setbacks since childhood, his psychology is also very fragile and he cannot bear a little blow.
If you have the above three behaviors, you must correct them in time, otherwise the child is likely to be "raised", and the pain in your old age will not be said, and it will delay the child's life.
In fact, every child has potential, and they may become elites in all walks of life in the future. Parents are the child's first teachers, and they must educate their children carefully and in a scientific way.
Children's life and learning should have rules and rules, and they should not be stocked.
"No rules, no squares", the growth of children should have the norms of the code of conduct, just like a small tree, can not be crooked, obliquely long. When a child's words and deeds make mistakes, they should be guided.
Children's study and life must have rules, treat elders with respect, treat friends sincerely, treat learning hard, and the strict requirements of parents can shape an excellent child.
Encourage children to do their own things and cultivate their ability to live independently.
The growth of children and their parents is a process of gradual distancing. If we want our child to live better, we have to plan for his future. Early let the child exercise the ability to be independent and autonomous, is the real love for the child.
A child's life should encounter a little setback in order to become strong and brave.
No one's life is smooth sailing, we always find a way to let the child "smooth sailing", the child will be very fragile. Properly let the child bear a little difficulty, their shoulders will become stronger and stronger, when the child is stronger and braver, it is the best protection of the parents for him.
"Parents love their children, but they have far-reaching plans", and the love of parents is to prepare for the day when they can be better separated from their children.
Interactive Topic: Did Your Child Make Mistakes? How did you get educated?
Slogan: Learning may not allow parents to cultivate excellent children 100%, but without learning, you can't cultivate excellent children, may every mother become a learning mother!